Act 4 — Scene IV.[1292]
Reading edition
Scene IV.[1292]
[Enter] Cob.
Cob. [knocks at the door.] What, Tib! Tib, I say!
Tib. [within.] How now, what cuckold is that knocks so hard?
Enter Tib.
O, husband! is it you? What’s the news? 5
Cob. Nay, you have stunn’d me, i’ faith; you ha’ giv’n me a knock o’ the forehead will stick by me. Cuckold! ’Slid, cuckold!
Tib. Away, you fool! did I know it was you that knockt? Come, come, you may call me as bad when you list. 11
Cob. May I? Tib, you are a whore.
Tib. You lie in your throat, husband.
Cob. How, the lie! and in my throat too! do you long to be stabb’d, ha? 15
Tib. Why, you are no soldier, I hope.
Cob. O, must you be stabb’d by a soldier? Mass, that’s true! When was Bobadill here, your captain? that rogue, that foist,[1293] that fencing Burgullion?[1294] I’ll tickle him, i’ faith.
Tib. Why, what’s the matter, trow? 21
Cob. O, he has basted me rarely, sumptuously! but I have it here in black and white [Pulls out the warrant], for his black and blue shall pay him. O, the justice, the honestest old brave 25 Trojan in London; I do honour the very flea of his dog. A plague on him, though, he put me once in a villanous filthy fear; marry, it vanished away like the smoke of tobacco; but I was smokt[1295] soundly first. I thank the devil, 30 and his good angel, my guest. Well, wife, or Tib, which you will, get you in, and lock the door; I charge you let nobody in to you, wife; nobody in to you; those are my words: not Captain Bob himself, nor the fiend in his 35 likeness. You are a woman, you have flesh and blood enough in you to be tempted; therefore keep the door shut upon all comers.
Tib. I warrant you, there shall nobody enter here without my consent. 40
Cob. Nor with your consent, sweet Tib; and so I leave you.
Tib. It’s more than you know, whether you leave me so.
Cob. How? 45
Tib. Why, sweet.
Cob. Tut, sweet or sour, thou art a flower. Keep close thy door, I ask no more.
[Exeunt.]