Dion. Come, ladies, shall we talk a round? As men Do walk a mile, women should talk an hour After supper: ’tis their exercise. Gal. ’T is late. Meg. ’T is all5 My eyes will do to lead me to my bed. Gal. I fear, they are so heavy, you’ll scarce find The way to your own lodging with ’em to-night.

Enter Pharamond.

Thra. The prince! Pha. Not a-bed, ladies? You’re good sitters-up.10 What think you of a pleasant dream, to last Till morning? Meg. I should choose, my lord, a pleasing wake before it.

Enter Arethusa and Bellario.

Are. ’T is well, my lord; you’re courting of these ladies.— Is ’t not late, gentlemen?15 Cle. Yes, madam. Are. Wait you there. Exit. Meg. [Aside.] She’s jealous, as I live.—Look you, my lord. The princess has a Hylas, an Adonis. Pha. His form is angel-like.20 Meg. Why, this is he that must, when you are wed, Sit by your pillow, like young Apollo, with His hand and voice binding your thoughts in sleep, The princess does provide him for you and for herself. Pha. I find no music in these boys. Meg. Nor I:25 They can do little, and that small they do, They have not wit to hide. Dion. Serves he the princess? Thra. Yes. Dion. ’T is a sweet boy: how brave[3214] she keeps him! Pha. Ladies all, good rest; I mean to kill a buck To-morrow morning ere you’ve done your dreams.30 Meg. All happiness attend your grace! [Exit Pharamond.] Gentlemen, good rest.— Come, shall we go to bed? Gal. Yes.—All good night. Dion. May your dreams be true to you!— Exeunt Galatea and Megra. What shall we do, gallants? ’t is late. The King Is up still: see, he comes; a guard along35 With him.

Enter King, Arethusa, and Guard.

King. Look your intelligence be true. Are. Upon my life, it is; and I do hope Your highness will not tie me to a man That in the heat of wooing throws me off, And takes another. Dion. What should this mean?40 King. If it be true, That lady had been better have embrac’d Cureless diseases. Get you to your rest: You shall be righted. Exeunt Arethusa and Bellario. —Gentlemen, draw near; We shall employ you. Is young Pharamond45 Come to his lodging? Dion. I saw him enter there. King. Haste, some of you, and cunningly discover If Megra be in her lodging. [Exit Dion.] Cle. Sir, She parted hence but now, with other ladies.50 King. If she be there, we shall not need to make A vain discovery of our suspicion. [Aside.] You gods. I see that who unrighteously Holds wealth or state from others shall be curst In that which meaner men are blest withal:55 Ages to come shall know no male of him Left to inherit, and his name shall be Blotted from earth; if he have any child, It shall be crossly match’d; the gods themselves Shall sow wild strife betwixt her lord and her. Yet, if it be your wills, forgive the sin61 I have committed; let it not fall Upon this understanding child of mine! She has not broke your laws. But how can I Look to be heard of gods that must be just,65 Praying upon the ground I hold by wrong?

Re-enter Dion.

Dion. Sir, I have asked, and her women swear she is within; but they, I think, are bawds. I told ’em, I must speak with her; they laught, and said, their lady lay speechless. I said,70 my business was important; they said, their lady was about it. I grew hot, and cried, my business was a matter that concern’d life and death; they answered, so was sleeping, at which their lady was. I urg’d again, she had scarce75 time to be so since last I saw her: they smil’d again, and seem’d to instruct me that sleeping was nothing but lying down and winking.[3215] Answers more direct I could not get: in short, sir, I think she is not there.80

King. ’Tis then no time to dally.—You o’ the guard, Wait at the back door of the prince’s lodging, And see that none pass thence, upon your lives. [Exeunt Guards.] Knock, gentlemen; knock loud; louder yet. [Dion, Cler., &c. knock at the door of Pharamond’s Lodging.] What, has their pleasure taken off their hearing?—85 I’ll break your meditations.—Knock again.— Not yet? I do not think he sleeps, having this Larum by him.—Once more.—Pharamond! prince! Pharamond [appears] above. Pha. What saucy groom knocks at this dead of night? Where be our waiters? By my vexed soul,90 He meets his death that meets me, for his boldness. King. Prince, prince, you wrong your thoughts; we are your friends: Come down. Pha. The King! King. The same, sir. Come down, sir: We have cause of present counsel with you. Pha. If your grace please95 To use me, I’ll attend you to your chamber.

Enter Pharamond below.

King. No, ’tis too late, prince; I’ll make bold with yours. Pha. I have some private reasons to myself Makes me unmannerly, and say you cannot.— They press to come in. Nay, press not forward, gentlemen; he must100 Come through my life that comes here. King. Sir, be resolv’d[3216] I must and will come.—Enter. Pha. I will not be dishonour’d. He that enters, enters upon his death. Sir, ’t is a sign you make no stranger of me,105 To bring these renegadoes to my chamber At these unseasoned hours. King. Why do you Chafe yourself so? You are not wrong’d nor shall be; Only I’ll search your lodging, for some cause To ourself known.—Enter, I say. Pha. I say, no.110

Enter Megra above.

Meg. Let ’em enter, prince, let ’em enter; I am up and ready:[3217] I know their business; ’Tis the poor breaking of a lady’s honour They hunt so hotly after; let ’em enjoy it.—114 You have your business, gentlemen; I lay here. Oh, my lord the King, this is not noble in you To make public the weakness of a woman! King. Come down. Meg. I dare, my lord. Your hootings and your clamours,119 Your private whispers and your broad fleerings, Can no more vex my soul than this base carriage.[3218] But I have vengeance yet in store for some Shall, in the most contempt you can have of me, Be joy and nourishment. King. Will you come down? Meg. Yes, to laugh at your worst; but I shall wring you,125 If my skill fail me not. [Exit above.] King. Sir, I must dearly chide you for this looseness; You have wrong’d a worthy lady; but, no more.— Conduct him to my lodging and to bed. [Exeunt Pharamond and Attendants.] Cle. Get him another wench, and you bring him to bed indeed.131 Dion. ’Tis strange a man cannot ride a stage Or two, to breathe himself, without a warrant. If his gear hold, that lodgings be search’d thus, Pray God we may lie with our own wives in safety,135 That they be not by some trick of state mistaken!

Enter [Attendants] with Megra [below].

King. Now, lady of honour, where ’s your honour now? No man can fit your palate but the prince. Thou most ill-shrouded rottenness, thou piece Made by a painter and a ’pothecary,140 Thou troubled sea of lust, thou wilderness Inhabited by wild thoughts, thou swoln cloud Of infection, thou ripe mine of all diseases, Thou all-sin, all-hell, and last, all-devils, tell me, Had you none to pull on with your courtesies145 But he that must be mine, and wrong my daughter? By all the gods, all these, and all the pages, And all the court, shall hoot thee through the court, Fling rotten oranges, make ribald rhymes, And sear thy name with candles upon walls!150 Do you laugh, Lady Venus? Meg. Faith, sir, you must pardon me; I cannot choose but laugh to see you merry. If you do this, O King! nay, if you dare do it, By all those gods you swore by, and as many155 More of my own, I will have fellows, and such Fellows in it, as shall make noble mirth! The princess, your dear daughter, shall stand by me On walls, and sung in ballads, any thing.159 Urge me no more; I know her and her haunts, Her lays, leaps, and outlays, and will discover all; Nay, will dishonour her. I know the boy She keeps; a handsome boy, about eighteen; Know what she does with him, where, and when.164 Come, sir, you put me to a woman’s madness, The glory of a fury; and if I do not Do ’t to the height—— King. What boy is this she raves at? Meg. Alas! good-minded prince, you know not these things! I am loth to reveal ’em. Keep this fault, As you would keep your health from the hot air170 Of the corrupted people, or, by Heaven, I will not fall alone. What I have known Shall be as public as a print; all tongues Shall speak it as they do the language they Are born in, as free and commonly; I ’ll set it, Like a prodigious[3219] star, for all to gaze at,176 And so high and glowing, that other kingdoms far and foreign Shall read it there, nay, travel with it, till they find No tongue to make it more, nor no more people; And then behold the fall of your fair princess! King. Has she a boy?181 Cle. So please your grace, I have seen a boy wait On her, a fair boy. King. Go, get you to your quarter: For this time I will study to forget you. Meg. Do you study to forget me, and I’ll study185 To forget you. Exeunt King, Megra, and Guard.

Cle. Why, here ’s a male spirit fit for Hercules. If ever there be Nine Worthies of women, this wench shall ride astride and be their captain.190

Dion. Sure, she has a garrison of devils in her tongue, she uttered such balls of wild-fire. She has so nettled the King, that all the doctors in the country will scarce cure him. That boy was a strange-found-out antidote to cure her195 infection; that boy, that princess’ boy; that brave, chaste, virtuous lady’s boy; and a fair boy, a well-spoken boy! All these considered, can make nothing else—but there I leave you, gentlemen.200

Thra. Nay, we’ll go wander with you.

Exeunt.

Notes in this chapter

Note 1 · Before Pharamond’s lodging in the court of the palace.Note 2 · Finely dressed.Note 3 · Closing the eyes.Note 4 · Convinced.Note 5 · Dressed.Note 6 · Behavior.Note 7 · Portentous, ominous.