Act 3 — [Scene I.][2535]

Orl. Stand not, sir, bare to me; I ha’ read oft That serpents who creep low, belch ranker poison Than winged dragons do that fly aloft. Mat. If it offend you, sir, ’t is for my pleasure.55 Orl. Your pleasure be ’t, sir. Umh, is this your palace? Bell. Yes, and our kingdom, for ’t is our content.

Bell. Oh sweet Matheo, peace. Upon my knees I do beseech you, sir, not to arraign me For sins, which Heaven, I hope, long since hath pardoned!70 Those flames, like lightning flashes, are so spent, The heat no more remains, than where ships went, Or where birds cut the air, the print remains. Mat. Pox on him, kneel to a dog. Bell. She that ’s a whore,75 Lives gallant, fares well, is not, like me, poor. I ha’ now as small acquaintance with that sin, As if I had never known ’t, that never been.

Yes thou hast ware to sell;85 Knaves are thy chapmen, and thy shop is hell.

Bell. Is this your comfort, when so many years160 You ha’ left me frozen to death? Orl. Freeze still, starve still! Bell. Yes, so I shall: I must: I must and will. If, as you say, I’m poor, relieve me then, Let me not sell my body to base men. You call me strumpet, Heaven knows I am none:165 Your cruelty may drive me to be one: Let not that sin be yours; let not the shame Of common whore live longer than my name. That cunning bawd, Necessity, night and day Plots to undo me; drive that bag away,170 Lest being at lowest ebb, as now I am, I sink for ever. Orl. Lowest ebb, what ebb? Bell. So poor, that, though to tell it be my shame, I am not worth a dish to hold my meat; I am yet poorer, I want bread to eat.175

Orl. I could feast ten good fellows with these hangers.[2543] Mat. The pox, you shall!185 Orl. I shall not, till thou begg’st, think thou art poor; And when thou begg’st I’ll feed thee at my door, As I feed dogs, with bones; till then beg, borrow, Pawn, steal, and hang, turn bawd, when thou art whore,— [Aside.] My heart-strings sure would crack, were they strain’d more. 190 Exit.

Brave i’ faith! Udsfoot, give me some meat.

Orl. Th’ art at the shipwrack now, and like a swimmer, Bold, but unexpert, with those waves dost play,285 Whose dalliance, whorelike, is to cast thee away. Enter Hippolito and Bellafront. And here ’s another vessel, better fraught, But as ill-mann’d; her sinking will be wrought, If rescue come not: like a man of war I ’ll therefore bravely out; somewhat I ’ll do, And either save them both, or perish too. 291 Exit.

Bell. Fate? your folly. Why should my face thus mad you? ’Las, those colours295 Are wound up long ago, which beauty spread: The flowers that once grew here, are withered. You turn’d my black soul white, made it look new, And should I sin, it ne’er should be with you. Hip. Your hand, I ’ll offer you fair play. When first300 We met i’ th’ lists together, you remember You were a common rebel; with one parley I won you to come in. Bell. You did. Hip. I ’ll try If now I can beat down this chastity With the same ordnance. Will you yield this fort,305 If the power of argument now, as then, I get of you the conquest: as before I turn’d you honest, now to turn you whore, By force of strong persuasion? Bell. If you can, I yield. Hip. The alarum ’s struck up; I ’m your man. Bell. A woman gives defiance. Hip. Sit. [They seat themselves.] Bell. Begin:311 ’T is a brave battle to encounter sin. Hip. Yon men that are to fight in the same war To which I ’m prest, and plead at the same bar, To win a woman, if you ’d have me speed,315 Send all your wishes! Bell. No doubt you ’re heard; proceed. Hip. To be a harlot, that you stand upon, The very name ’s a charm to make you one. Harlotta[2556] was a dame of so divine319 And ravishing touch[2557] that she was concubine To an English king; her sweet bewitching eye Did the king’s heart-strings in such love-knots tie That even the coyest was proud when she could hear Men say, “Behold, another Harlot there!” And after her all women that were fair325 Were harlots call’d, as to this day some are: Besides, her dalliance she so well does mix, That she ’s in Latin call’d the Meretrix. Thus for the name: for the profession, this: Who lives in bondage, lives lac’d; the chief bliss330 This world below can yield, is liberty: And who, than whores, with looser wings dare fly? As Juno’s proud bird spreads the fairest tail, So does a strumpet hoist the loftiest sail, She ’s no man’s slave; men are her slaves; her eye335 Moves not on wheels screw’d up with jealousy. She, hors’d or coach’d, does merry Journeys make, Free as the sun in his gilt zodiac: As bravely does she shine, as fast she ’s driven, But stays not long in any house of heaven;340 But shifts from sign to sign, her amorous prizes More rich being when she ’s down, than when she rises. In brief, gentlemen haunt them, soldiers fight for them, Few men but know them, few or none abhor them. Thus for sport’s sake speak I, as to a woman Whom, as the worst ground, I would turn to common:346 But you I would enclose for mine own bed. Bell. So should a husband be dishonoured. Hip. Dishonour’d? Not a whit: to fall to one Besides your husband is to fall to none,350 For one no number is. Bell. Faith, should you take One in your bed, would you that reckoning make? ’T is time you found retreat. Hip. Say, have I won, Is the day ours? Bell. The battle ’s but half done, None but yourself have yet sounded alarms,355 Let us strike too, else you dishonour arms. Hip. If you can win the day, the glory’s yours. Bell. To prove a woman should not be a whore: When she was made, she ’d one man, and no more;359 Yet she was tied to laws then, for even than,[2558] ’T is said, she was not made for men, but man. Anon, t’ increase earth’s brood, the law was varied, Men should take many wives: and though they married According to that act, yet ’t is not known But that those wives were only tied to one.365 New parliaments were since: for now one woman Is shar’d between three hundred, nay she ’s common, Common! as spotted leopards, whom for sport Men hunt to get the flesh, but care not for ’t. So spread they nets of gold, and tune their calls,370 To enchant silly women to take falls; Swearing they ’re angels, which that they may win They ’ll hire the devil to come with false dice in. Oh Sirens’ subtle tunes! yourselves you flatter, And our weak sex betray: so men love water; It serves to wash their hands, but being once foul,375 The water down is pour’d, cast out of doors; And even of such base use do men make whores. A harlot, like a hen, more sweetness reaps, To pick men one by one up, than in heaps:380 Yet all feeds but confounding.[2559] Say you should taste me, I serve but for the time, and when the day Of war is done, am cashier’d out of pay: If like lame soldiers I could beg, that ’s all, And there ’s lust’s rendezvous, an hospital.385 Who then would be a man’s slave, a man ’s woman? She ’s half starv’d the first day that feeds in common. Hip. You should not feed so, but with me alone. Bell. If I drink poison by stealth, is ’t not all one? Is ’t not rank poison still with you alone?390 Nay, say you spi’d a courtesan, whose soft side To touch you ’d sell your birth-right, for one kiss Be rack’d; she ’s won, you’re sated: what follows this? Oh, then you curse that bawd that toll’d[2560] you in, The night; you curse your lust, you loathe the sin,395 You loathe her very sight, and ere the day Arise, you rise glad when y’ are stol’n away. Even then when you are drunk with all her sweets, There ’s no true pleasure in a strumpet’s sheets. Women whom lust so prostitutes to sale,400 Like dancers upon ropes, once seen, are stale. Hip. If all the threads of harlot’s lives are spun, So coarse as you would make them, tell me why You so long lov’d the trade? Bell. If all the threads Of harlot’s lives be fine as you would make them,405 Why do not you persuade your wife turn whore, And all dames else to fall before that sin? Like an ill husband, though I knew the same To be my undoing, followed I that game. Oh, when the work of lust had earn’d my bread,410 To taste it how I trembled, lest each bit, Ere it went down, should choke me chewing it! My bed seem’d like a cabin hung in hell, The bawd, bell’s porter, and the lickerish[2561] wine The pander fetch’d, was like an easy fine,415 For which, methought, I leas’d away my soul; And oftentimes, even in my quaffing bowl, Thus said I to myself, I am a whore, And have drunk down thus much confusion more.419 Hip. It is a common rule, and ’t is more true, Two of one trade ne’er love: no more do you. Why are you sharp ’gainst that you once profest? Bell. Why dote you on that, which you did once detest? I cannot, seeing she ’s woven of such bad stuff, Set colours on a harlot base enough.425 Nothing did make me, when I lov’d them best, To loathe them more than this: when in the street A fair young modest damsel I did meet, She seem’d to all a dove, when I pass’d by, And I to all a raven: every eye430 That followed her went with a bashful glance, At me each bold and jeering countenance Darted forth scorn; to her as if she had been Some tower unvanquished, would they vail,[2562] ’Gainst me swoln rumour hoisted every sail; She, crown’d with reverend praises, pass’d by them,436 I, though with face mask’d, could not scape the “Hem!” For, as if Heaven had set strange marks on whores, Because they should be pointing stocks to man, Drest up in civilest shape, a courtesan—440 Let her walk saint-like, noteless, and unknown, Yet she ’s betray’d by some trick of her own. Were harlots therefore wise, they ’d be sold dear: For men account them good but for one year, And then like almanacs whose dates are gone,445 They are thrown by, and no more look’d upon. Who ’ll therefore backward fall, who will launch forth In seas so foul, for ventures no more worth? Lust’s voyage hath, if not this course, this cross, Buy ne’er so cheap, your ware comes home with loss.450 What, shall I sound retreat? The battle ’s done: Let the world judge which of us two have won. Hip. I! Bell. You? nay then as cowards do in fight, What by blows cannot, shall be sav’d by flight. Exit. Hip. Fly to earth’s fixed centre: to the caves Of everlasting horror. I ’ll pursue thee,456 Though loaden with sins, even to hell’s brazen doors. Thus wisest men turn fools, doting on whores. Exit.