HELPFUL HINT FOR NOVEMBER
Reading edition
Do not put brandy in your mince pies. It spoils it—the brandy, we mean. We cannot speak too strongly against the pernicious habit of doctoring mince meat with brandy. It lures men on. The first baleful bite rouses the appetite, and soon they will be eating mince pie after mince pie all day, and eventually be laid up with indigestion. And even the aggressive clove curls up and faints when ordered to disguise a mince pie breath. How To Get Rid of the Gypsy Moth First, climb the tree where he resides and carefully put him in your hip pocket; then fall heavily to the ground, landing on your back in such a manner as to disfigure the moth permanently. If he survives, circulate stories derogatory to gypsies generally and he will leave of his own accord. Horticultural Note: This is a good month to get a slip from an ice plant. Walk through it without rubbers.
SUNDAYEVOLUTION
"I'm not a beauty, I'll allow," Said the poor mule, lank and old, "But I'm less of a jackass, anyhow, Than my father was, I'm told."
MONDAY
TUESDAY
WEDNESDAY(1904) Prohibitionists nominated Swallow for President. He went down easily.
THURSDAY
FRIDAY(1905) Roosevelt discovered that he was nominated June "23."
(1906) Roosevelt decides not to run for third term.
SATURDAY
NOVEMBER
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned and, according to all accounts, it also has many other discomforts of home.