HEALTH HINTS
Reading edition
To cure seasickness: Turn the entire system inside out and hang it over the rail of the ship where the salt spray can drench it. Under this treatment the patient is pretty sure to feel somewhat relieved within a few days after the time of going ashore. Persons troubled with poor circulation should ascertain how to increase the same by consulting the editor of their favorite Sunday newspaper. Weak respiration may be improved by a diet of onions. They are highly recommended for strengthening the breath. For insomnia try snoring, which is always a symptom of SOUND sleep. To prevent hay fever: Go not in the way of the kittenish grass widow. Care should be taken to prevent the occupants of the penitentiary from getting the measles. It would make trouble should they all break out at once. Financial Note: For "dust" in the house, ask hubby. Art Note: An artists' model is not necessarily a model of good behavior.
SUNDAY
MONDAY(862 B.C.) Jonah took the first trip in a submarine.
TUESDAY(753 B.C.) Romulus and Remus open a milk route.
WEDNESDAY
THURSDAY
FRIDAY(1709) Pianoforte invented by Bartolommeo Cristofori. His assassination soon follows.
SATURDAY
SEPTEMBER
It is better to laugh at a joke you don't understand than to weep over the efforts of your friend to explain it.