NOT GOOD LOOKING

A man was buying a horse of a French Canadian. He looked the animal over carefully. The Frenchman said, “He not look ver’ goot, but he is a goot horse.” The purchaser, not setting much store by the man’s judgment of good looks in a horse, and saying that he didn’t care for appearance provided other things were all right, bought the animal. Next day he brought the horse back, saying that he was blind of an eye, and demanded his money back, but the Frenchman said, “Non! Vot I tell you? Did I not say zat he not look goot?”

One day when Mrs. Van Auken installed a Chinaman in her kitchen, the following conversation took place: “What is your name, sir?” asked Mrs. Van Auken. “Oh, my namee Ah Sin Foo!” “But I can’t remember all that lingo, my man. I’ll call you Jimmy.” “Velly welle. Now whachee namee I callee you?” “Well, my name is Mrs. Van Auken. Call me that.” “Oh, me can no membel Missee Yanne Auken. Too big piecee namee. I callee you Tommy—Missee Tommy.”