“LOUDER!”

At a criminal trial both judge and counsel had a deal of trouble to make the timid witnesses speak loud enough to be heard by the jury, and it is possible that the temper of the counsel may thereby have been turned from the even tenor of its way. After this gentleman had gone through the various stages of bar pleading, and had coaxed, threatened and even bullied the witnesses, there was called into the box a young hostler who appeared to be simplicity itself.

“Now, sir,” said the counsel, in a tone that would at any other time have been denounced as vulgarly loud, “I hope we shall have no difficulty in making you speak out.”

“I hope not, sir,” was shouted, or rather bellowed out, by the witness in tones which almost shook the building, and would certainly have alarmed any timid or nervous person.

“How dare you speak in that way, sir?” demanded the counsel.

“Please, sir, I can’t speak no louder,” roared the perplexed witness, evidently thinking that fault was found with him for speaking too softly.

“Pray, have you been drinking this morning?” shouted the counsel, who had now thoroughly lost the last remnant of his temper.

“Yes, sir,” was the stentorian reply.

“And what have you been drinking?”

“Corfee, sir.”

“And what did you have in your coffee?”

“A spune, sir,” bawled the witness in his highest key amidst the roars of the court.