An Editorial Schedule.

It has occurred to us that there could be no better time than the present for a combined strike among newspaper-men for less work and more pay. The employees of the press throughout the country have been painfully aware for a long time that their services are not remunerated as they should be,—that too little pay is doled out to them for too much work. While train-movers and butcher-boys and dirt-shovellers in divers parts of the republic are demanding compensation commensurate with their toil, why should not the meek and lowly journalist turn like the trodden worm, and sting the iron heel that is grinding him in the dust of starvation and obscurity? We are told that a secret order is now being organized among editors and reporters, and that, within a short time, this continent will be convulsed with the most prodigious uprising that has ever taken place between the shores of the Atlantic and the Pacific. The object of this secret, modest, but puissant organization is to better the condition of the practical journalist, and thus directly benefit the universal cause of literature; and we are confidently informed that upon next Fourth of July,—being the hundred and tenth anniversary of this nation’s independence,—the following schedule of weekly wages to be paid editors and reporters will be 208submitted to the proprietors of American newspapers:—

To editorial writers who “used to know Thurlow Weed and Horace Greeley,” and who wear long beards and no neckties, and who write essays beginning with “We opine,” or with “Albeit” $30

To editorial writers who read “The Nation,” and “The Scientific American” 40

To editorial writers who would like to spend their declining years at the head of an established country weekly 25

To editorial writers who receive mail addressed to “The Hon.,” and who covet a foreign mission 20

To reporters who “know Dana, and have worked on ‘The New-York Sun’” 8

To reporters who say “Yes, sir,” and “No, sir,” to the city editor 12

To critics who discuss “the rendition,” “the mise en scene,” “the floritures, bravuras,” etc. 15

To poets of the “Hope,” “Eternity,” “Spring,” “Banana,” “Stovepipe,” and “Bobtail-Flush” kind 18

To female reporters who seek to demonstrate that a female can do a man’s work 10

For “society” drivel 8

To ex-lawyers, ex-preachers, ex-statesmen, and ex-tradesmen who have been starved into journalism 15

To editorial writers who have held a clerkship in Washington one winter, and are thoroughly acquainted with national politics and the tariff question 20

But we can violate this confidence no further. Suffice it to say, that, when once the grasping 209monopolists who now hold the journalistic intellect of our country by the throat are compelled to accede to the just demands of brain-labor, pale faces and haggard forms will be banished from our newspaper offices, and affluence will reign where the twin vultures, starvation and penury, now brood in hideous silence.