The Poetical Works of John Skelton, Volume 1 (of 2)

Volume 2 — SKELTONIS APOSTROPHAT AD DIVUM JOHANNEM DECOLLATUM, IN CUJUS PROFESTO FIEBAT HOC AUCUPIUM.

Reading edition

O memoranda dies, qua, decollate[639] Johannes, Aucupium facit, haud[640] quondam[641] quod fecerit, intra[642] Ecclesiam de Dis, violans tua[643] sacra sacrorum! Rector de Whipstok, doctor cognomine Daucock, Et dominus Wodcock; probat is, probat hic, probat hæc hoc.

IDEM[644] DE LIBERA DICACITATE POETICA IN EXTOLLENDA PROBITATE, ET IN PERFRICANDA IGNOBILITATE.

Libertas veneranda piis concessa poetis Dicendi est quæcunque placent, quæcunque juvabunt, Vel quæcunque valent justas defendere causas, Vel quæcunque valent[645] stolidos mordere petulcos. Ergo dabis veniam. Quod Skelton, laureat.

EPITHAPHE.[646]

This tretise devysed it is Of two knaues somtyme of Dis. Though this knaues be deade, Full of myschiefe and queed, Yet, where so euer they ly, Theyr names shall neuer dye.

Compendium de duobus versipellibus, John Jayberd, et Adam all[647] a knaue, deque illorum notissima vilitate.

A DEUOUTE TRENTALE FOR OLD JOHN CLARKE, SOMETYME THE HOLY PATRIARKE OF DIS.

Sequitur trigintale Tale quale rationale, Licet parum curiale, Tamen satis est formale, Joannis Clerc, hominis Cujusdam multinominis,[648] Joannes Jayberd qui vocatur, Clerc cleribus nuncupatur. Obiit sanctus iste pater Anno Domini MD. sexto. 10 In parochia de Dis Non erat sibi similis; In malitia vir insignis, Duplex corde et bilinguis; Senio confectus, Omnibus suspectus, Nemini dilectus, Sepultus est amonge the wedes: God forgeue hym his mysdedes! Dulce melos Penetrans cœlos. Carmina cum cannis cantemus festa Joannis: Clerk obiit vere, Jayberd nomenque dedere; Dis populo[649] natus, Clerk cleribus estque vocatus. Hic vir Chaldæus, nequam vir, ceu Jebusæus, In Christum Domini fremuit de more cameli, 10 Rectori proprio tam verba retorta loquendo Unde resultando— que Acheronta[650] boando tonaret. Nunquam sincere solitus sua crimina flere; Cui male lingua loquax— que dicax mendaxque, fuere Et mores tales resident in nemine quales; 20 Carpens vitales auras, turbare sodales Et cines socios,[651] asinus, mulus velut, et bos. Omne suum studium rubeum pictum per amictum Discolor; et victum faciens semper maledictum Ex intestinis ovium— que boumque caprorum; 30 Tendens adque forum, fragmentum colligit horum, Dentibus exemptis mastigat cumque polentis Lanigerum caput aut ovis[652] aut vaccæ mugientis. Quid petis, hic sit quis? John Jayberd, incola[653] de Dis; Cui, dum vixerat is, sociantur jurgia, vis, lis. 40 Jam jacet hic starke deed, Neuer a toth in his heed. Adieu, Jayberd, adue, I faith, dikkon thou crue! Fratres, orate For this knauate, By the holy rode, Dyd neuer man good: I pray you all, And pray shall, 50 At this trentall On knees to fall To the fote ball; With, fill the blak bowle For Jayberdes sowle. Bibite multum: Ecce sepultum Sub pede stultum, Asinum, et mulum! The deuill kis his culum! 60 Wit[h], hey, howe, rumbelowe, Rumpopulorum, Per omnia secula seculorum! Amen.

Requiem, &c. Per Fredericum Hely, Fratrem de Monte Carmeli, Qui condunt sine sale Hoc devotum trigintale. Vale Jayberd, valde male!

Adam Vddersall,[654] Alias dictus Adam all a knaue, his Epitaph foloweth deuoutly; He was somtime the holy Baillyue of Dis. Of Dis Adam degebat: dum vixit, falsa gerebat, Namque extorquebat quicquid nativus habebat, Aut liber natus; rapidus[655] lupus inde vocatus: Ecclesiamque satus de Belial iste Pilatus Sub pede calcatus violavit, nunc violatus: 10 Perfidus, iratus, numquam fuit ille beatus: Uddersall stratus benedictis[656] est spoliatus, Improbus, inflatus, maledictis jam laceratus: Dis,[657] tibi bacchatus ballivus prædominatus: Hic fuit ingratus, porcus velut insatiatus, 20 Pinguis, crassatus; velut Agag sit[658] reprobatus! Crudelisque Cacus barathro, peto, sit tumulatus! Belsabub his soule saue, Qui jacet hic, like a knaue! Jam scio mortuus est, Et jacet hic, like a best. Anima ejus De malo in pejus.[659] Amen. 30 De Dis hæc semper erit camena, Adam Uddersall sit anathema! Auctore Skelton, rectore de Dis.

Finis, &c. Apud Trumpinton scriptum[660] per Curatum ejusdem, quinto die Januarii Anno Domini, secundum computat. Angliæ, MDVII.

Adam, Adam, ubi es? Genesis. Re. Ubi nulla requies, ubi nullus ordo, sed sempiternus horror inhabitat. Job.

Diligo rustincum[661] cum portant bis duo quointum, Et cantant delos est mihi dulce melos. 1. Canticum dolorosum.

Notes in this chapter

Note 1 · decollate] Eds. “decolare.”Note 2 · haud] Eds. “hod.”Note 3 · quondam] Marshe’s ed. “quandam.”Note 4 · intra] Eds. “infra.”Note 5 · tua] Eds. “sua.”Note 6 · Idem, &c.] These lines follow Ware the Hawk in all the eds.Note 7 · valent] Eds. “volent.”Note 8 · Epithaphe, &c.] From Marshe’s ed. of Skelton’s Workes, 1568.Note 9 · all] Ed. “ali.:” but compare p. 171.Note 10 · multinominis] Ed. “maltimoniis.”Note 11 · populo] The correction of the Rev. J. Mitford. Ed. “populus.”Note 12 · que Acheronta, &c. ... que dicax, &c.] Perhaps these passages ought to be arranged thus for the sake of the rhyme; “que Acheronta boando to Note 13 · socios] Ed. “socias.”Note 14 · caput aut ovis] Ed. “caput caput.” I give the conjectural reading of the Rev. J. Mitford. The rhyme suggests (but the metre will not allow) Note 15 · incola] Ed. “Nicolas.”Note 16 · Vddersall, &c.] Ed. “Vddersale:” but compare vv. 13, 32. In this passage I have adopted the arrangement proposed by the Rev. J. Mitford.—Ed.Note 17 · rapidus] The Rev. J. Mitford conjectures, “rabidus;” but rapidus is frequently used in the same sense.Note 18 · benedictis] Ed. “Benedictus;” and in the next line but one, “Maledictus.”Note 19 · Dis, tibi, &c.] The emendation of the Rev. J. Mitford: compare above, “Baillyue of Dis.”—Ed. “Sis tibi baccatus Balians prædominatus.”Note 20 · sit] Ed. “fit.”Note 21 · pejus] Ed. “peuis.”Note 22 · scriptum] Ed. “scripter.”Note 23 · Diligo rustincum, &c.] This and the following piece are from Marshe’s ed. of Skelton’s Workes, 1568. In that collection the present couplet