Act 2 — ACT II. SCENE I.

Enter Mr. Barnard.

Heaven be now my comfort, for my house is hell: [Starts.] Who's there, what do you want? who are you?

Enter servant with a portmanteau.

Serv. Sir, here's your cousin Janno and cousin Mawkin come from Paris.

Mr. Barn. What a plague do they want?

Enter Janno leading in Mawkin.

Jan. Come, sister, come along——O here's cousin Barnard——Cousin Barnard, your servant——Here's my sister Mawkin and I are come to see you.

Mawk. Ay, cousin, here's brother Janno and I are come from Paris to see you: pray how does cousin Mariamne do?

Jan. My sister and I waunt well at Paris; so my father sent us here for two or three weeks to take a little country air.

Mr. Barn. You cou'd not come to a worse place; for this is the worst air in the whole county.

Mawk. Nay, I'm sure, my father says it is the best.

Mr. Barn. Your father's a fool; I tell ye, 'tis the worst.

Jan. Nay, cousin, I fancy you're mistaken now; for I begin to find my stomach come to me already; in a fortnight's time you shall see how I'll lay about me.

Mr. Barn. I don't at all doubt it.

Mawk. Father wou'd have sent sister Flip. and little brother Humphrey, but the calash would not hold us all, and so they don't come till to-morrow with mother.

Jan. Come, sister, let's put up our things in our chamber; and after you have washed my face, and put me on a clean neckcloth, we'll go in and see how our cousins do.

Mawk. Ay, come along, we'll go and see cousin Mariamne.

Jan. Cousin, we shan't give you much trouble, one bed will serve us; for sister Mawkin and I always lie together.

Mawk. But, cousin; mother prays you that you'd order a little cock-broth for brother Janno and I, to be got ready as soon as may be.

Jan. Ay, a propos, cousin Barnard, that's true; my mother desires, that we may have some cock-broth to drink two or three times a-day between meals, for my sister and I are sick folks.

Mawk. And some young chickens, too, the doctor said would bring us to our stomachs very soon.

Jan. You fib now, sister, it waunt young chickens, so it waunt, it was plump partridges sure, the doctor said so.

Mawk. Ay, so it was brother,—come, let's go in, and see our cousins.

Jan. Ay, come along, sister—cousin Barnard, don't forget the cock-broth.

[Exeunt Janno and Mawkin.

Mr. Barn. What the Devil does all this mean——mother, and sister Flip., and little brother Humphrey, and chickens, and partridges, and cock-broth, and fire from hell to dress 'em all.