DYSPEPSIA
Reading edition
Joy of Eating
A well-known banker in a down-town restaurant was eating mush and milk.
"What's the matter?" inquired a friend.
"Got dyspepsia."
"Don't you enjoy your meals?"
"Enjoy my meals?" snorted the indignant dyspeptic. "My meals are merely guide-posts to take medicine before or after."
"Dyspepsia seldom kills anyone," said Akinside, "but—"
"No," returned old Festus Pester. "It makes them so talkative that everybody else wants to kill them."