Scene VIII.

Enter, at a distance, Laches and Phidippus.

Lach. Did you not say, just now, that she was waiting for my son’s return?

Phid. Just so.

Lach. They say that he has arrived; let her return.

Pam. (apart to himself, aloud.) What excuse to make to my father for not taking her back, I don’t know!

Lach. (turning round.) Who was it I heard speaking here?

Pam. (apart.) I am resolved to persevere in the course I determined to pursue.

Lach. ’Tis the very person about whom I was talking to you.

Pam. Health to you, my father.

Lach. Health to you, my son.

Phid. I am glad that you have returned, Pamphilus, and the more especially so, as you are safe and well.

Pam. I believe you.

Lach. Have you but just arrived?

Pam. Only just now.

Lach. Tell me, what has our cousin Phania left us?

Pam. Why really, i’faith, he was a man very much devoted to pleasure while he lived; and those who are so, don’t much benefit their heirs, but for themselves leave this commendation: While he lived, he lived well.47

Lach. So then, you have brought home nothing more48 than a single sentiment?

Pam. Whatever he has left, we are the gainers by it.

Lach. Why no, it has proved a loss; for I could have wished him alive and well.

Phid. You may wish that with impunity; he’ll never come to life again; and after all I know which of the two you would prefer.

Lach. Yesterday, he (pointing to Phidippus) desired Philumena to be fetched to his house. (Whispers to Phidippus, nudging him with his elbow.) Say that you desired it.

Phid. (aside to Laches.) Don’t punch me so. (To Pamphilus.) I desired it.

Lach. But he’ll now send her home again.

Phid. Of course.

Pam. I know the whole affair, and how it happened; I heard it just now, on my arrival.

Lach. Then may the Gods confound those spiteful people who told this news with such readiness!

Pam. (to Phidippus.) I am sure that it has been my study, that with reason no slight might possibly be committed by your family; and if I were now truthful to mention of how faithful, loving, and tender a disposition I have proved toward her, I could do so truly, did I not rather wish that you should learn it of herself; for by that method you will be the more ready to place confidence in my disposition when she, who is now acting unjustly toward me, speaks favorably of me. And that through no fault of mine this separation has taken place, I call the Gods to witness. But since she considers that it is not befitting her to give way to my mother, and with readiness to conform to her temper, and as on no other terms it is possible for good feeling to exist between them, either my mother must be separated, Phidippus, from me, or else Philumena. Now affection urges me rather to consult my mother’s pleasure.

Lach. Pamphilus, your words have reached my ears not otherwise than to my satisfaction, since I find that you postpone all considerations for your parent. But take care, Pamphilus, lest impelled by resentment, you carry matters too far.

Pam. How, impelled by resentment, could I now be biased against her who never has been guilty of any thing toward me, father, that I could not wish, and who has often deserved as well as I could desire? I both love and praise and exceedingly regret her, for I have found by experience that she was of a wondrously engaging disposition with regard to myself; and I sincerely wish that she may spend the remainder of her life with a husband who may prove more fortunate than me, since necessity thus tears her from me.

Phid. ’Tis in your own power to prevent that.

Lach. If you are in your senses, order her to come back.

Pam. It is not my intention, father; I shall study my mother’s interests.

Going away.

Lach. Whither are you going? Stay, stay, I tell you; whither are you going?

Exit Pamphilus.