A Fairy Story by Little Johnny.

Me an Billy we ben readn fairy tales, an I never see such woppers. I bet the feller wich rote em will be burnt every tiny little bit up wen he dies, but Billy says they are all true but the facks. Uncle Ned sed cude I tell one, and I ast him wot about, and he sed: "Wel Johnny, as you got to do the tellin I'le leav the choice of subjeck entirely to you; jest giv us some thing about a little boy that went and sook his forten."

So I sed: "One time there was a little boy went out for to seek his forten, and first thing he see was great big yello posy on a punkin vine."

Then Uncle Ned he sed: "Johnny, was that the punkin vine wich your bed once had a bizness connection with?" But I didn't anser, only went on with the story.

"So the little boy he wocked into the posy, and crold down the vine on his hands and kanees bout ten thousan hundred miles, till he come bime bi to a door, wich he opened an went in an found hisself in a grate big house, ofle nice like a kings pallows or a hotell. But the little boy dident find any body to home and went out a other door, where he see a ocion with a bote, and he got in the bote."

Then Uncle Ned he sed a uther time: "Johnny, excuse the ignance of a man wich has been in Injy an evry were, but is it the regular thing for punkin vines to have sea side resorts in em?"

But I only sed: "Wen the little boy had saild out of site of land the bote it sunk, and he went down, down, down in the water, like he was tied around the neck of a mill stone, till he was swollowed by a wale, cos wales is the largest of created beings wich plows the deep, but lions is the king of beests, an the American eagle can lick ol other birds, hooray! Wen the boy was a seekn his forten in the stummeck of the wales belly he cut to a fence, an wen he had got over the fence he found hisself in a rode runin thru a medder, and it was a ofle nice country fur as he cude see."

"Uncle Ned sed: "Did he put up at the same way side inn wich was patternized by Jonah wen he pennitrated to that part of the morl vinyerd?"

But I said: "Bimebi he seen a rope hangin down from the ski, and he begin for to clime it up, a sayin, 'Snitchety, snatchety, up I go,' 'wot time is it old witch?' 'niggers as good as a white man,' 'fee-faw-fum,' 'Chinese mus go,' 'all men is equil fore de law,' 'blitherum, blatherum, boo,' and all the words of madgick wich he cude think of. After a wile it got reel dark, but he kep on a climeing, and pretty sune he see a round spot of dalite over his hed, and then he cum up out of a well in a grate city."

Jest then my father he came in, and he said: "Johnny, you get the bucket and go to the wel and fetch sum water for your mother to wash the potatoes."

But I said it was Billy's tern, and Billy he sed twasent no sech thing, and I said he lide, and he hit me on the snoot of my nose, and we fot a fite, but victery percht upon the banners of my father, cos he had a stick. Then wile me and Billy was crying Uncle Ned he spoke up and begun: "One time there was a grate North American fairy taler—"

But I jest fetched Mose a kick, wich is the cat, and went out and pitcht into Sammy Doppy, which licked me reel mean.

BREEDERS DIRECTORY.

The following list embraces the names of responsible and reliable Breeders in their line, and parties wishing to purchase or obtain information can feel assured that they will be honorably dealt with:

CATTLE.

Jersey.

Mills, Charles F.Springfield, Illinois

HORSES.

Clydesdales.

Mills, Charles F.Springfield, Illinois

SWINE.

Berkshire.

Mills, Charles F.Springfield, Illinois

Chester Whites.

W.A. GilbertWauwatosa Wis.

SHEEP.

Cotswold.

Mills, Charles F.Springfield, Illinois

LIVE STOCK, Etc.

Jersey Bulls.

JERSEY BREEDERS desiring young bulls of the most approved form and breeding, and representing the families most noted for large yields of butter, will serve their interests by addressing the undersigned.

Stock recorded in A. J. C. C. H. R.

Cotswold Sheep.

CHOICE representatives of this large and popular breed of sheep for sale at prices satisfactory to buyers.

Ewes and rams of different ages.

Breeding stock recorded in the American Cotswold Record.

CHAS. F. MILLS, Springfield, Ill.

VICTORIA SWINE.

FALSTAFF.

Winner of First Prize Chicago Fat Stock Show 1878. Originators of this famous breed. Also breeders of Pekin Ducks and Light Brahma Fowls. Stock for sale. Send for circular A.

SCHIEDT & DAVIS, Dyer, Lake Co. Ind.

We will send you a watch or a chain BY MAIL OR EXPRESS, C.O.D., to be examined before paying any money and if not satisfactory, returned at our expense. We manufacture all our watches and save you 30 per cent. Catalogue of 250 styles free. Every Watch Warranted. Address

STANDARD AMERICAN WATCH CO., PITTSBURGH. PA.

MEDICAL.

Weak Nervous Men

Whose debility, exhausted powers, premature decay and failure to perform life's duties properly are caused by excesses, errors of youth, etc., will find a perfect and lasting restoration to robust health and vigorous manhood in

THE MARSTON BOLUS.

Neither stomach drugging nor instruments. This treatment of Nervous Debility and Physical Decay is uniformly successful because based on perfect diagnosis, new and direct methods and absolute thoroughness. Full information and Treatise free.

Address Consulting Physician of MARSTON REMEDY CO., 46W. 14th St., New York.

TWO LADIES MET ONE DAY.

One said to the other "By the way how is that Catarrh of yours?" "Why it's simply horrid, getting worse every day." "Well, why don't you try 'Dr. Sykes' Sure Cure,' I know it will cure you!" "Well, then I will, for I've tried everything else."

Just six weeks afterward they met again and No. 1 said. "Why, how much better you look, what's up! Going to get married, or what?" "Well, yes, and it's all owing to 'Dr. Sykes' Sure Cure for Catarrh;' oh, why didn't I know of it before? it's simply wonderful."

Send 10 cents to Dr. C.R. Sykes, 181 Monroe street, Chicago, for valuable book of full information, and mention the "Two Ladies."

30 DAYS' TRIAL

BEFORE. AFTER.

ELECTRO VOLTAIC BELT, and other Electric Appliances. We will send on Thirty Days' Trial, TO MEN, YOUNG OR OLD, who are suffering from Nervous Debility, Lost Vitality, and those diseases of a Personal Nature resulting from Abuses and Other Causes. Speedy relief and complete restoration to Health, Vigor and Manhood Guaranteed. Send at once for Illustrated Pamphlet free. Address

Voltaic Belt Co., Marshall, Mich.

I CURE FITS!

When I say cure I do not mean merely to stop them for a time and then have them return again, I mean a radical cure. I have made the disease of FITS, EPILEPSY or FALLING SICKNESS a life-long study. I warrant my remedy to cure the worst cases. Because others have failed is no reason for not now receiving a cure. Send at once for a treatise and a Free Bottle of my infallible remedy. Give Express and Post Office. It costs you nothing for a trial, and I will cure you.

Address Dr. H.G. ROOT, 183 Pearl St., New York.

BEST QUALITY.

New designs in Satin and Gold finish, with name, 10 cts. We offer $100 for a pack of cards any nicer work, or prettier styles. Samples free. Eagle Card Works, New Haven, Ct.

MISCELLANEOUS.

DIAMONDS FREE!

We desire to make the circulation of our paper 250,000 during the next six months. To accomplish which we will give absolutely free a genuine first water Diamond Ring, and the Home Companion for one year, for only $2.00. Our reasons for making this unprecedented offer are as follows;

A newspaper with 200,000 subscribers can get 1c. per line per 1,000 of circulation for its advertising space, or $5,000 per issue more than it costs to produce and mail the paper. With but 10,000 or 20,000 subscribers, its advertising revenues do not pay expenses. Only the papers with mammoth circulations make fortunes for their owners, derived from advertising space. For these and other reasons, we regard 100,000 subscribers as being of more financial benefit to a paper than the paper is to the subscribers. With 100,000 or 200,000 bona-fide subscribers, we make $100,000 to $200,000 a year clear profit from advertising, above cost of publishing. Without a large circulation, we would lose money. Therefore, to secure a very large circulation, and thus receive high rates and large profits from advertising space, this only equitable plan of conducting business is adopted.

The first question to be answered is,—is the diamond pure—a genuine stone? Our answer is YES.

The stone is GUARANTEED to be no Alaska Diamond, Rhine Pebble, or other imitation, but a

WARRANTED GENUINE AND PURE DIAMOND.

If it is not found so by the most careful and searching tests, we will refund the money, enter the subscriber's name on our list, and have the paper mailed to him free during its existence. To the publisher of this paper has been sent a guarantee from the manufacturing Jeweler, from whom we obtain these rings, that they are just as represented, so that readers may rely upon the promises being fulfilled to the letter.

The second question is, IS THE PAPER A DESIRABLE FAMILY JOURNAL? YES. It contains contributions from the first writers of the times: fiction, choice facts, intellectual food of the most interesting, instructive and refined character. It is one of the

LEADING PAPERS OF THE PROGRESSIVE WEST.

We are determined to make it the most desirable and reliable paper in the United States; will spare no effort or money to achieve that object. Sample Copies sent free on application. Remit by draft, express, or new postal note, to

THE HOME COMPANION. N.W. Cor. Fourth and Race Streets, Cincinnati, O.

Don't fail to name the paper in which you see this advertisement.

Don't be Humbugged With Poor, Cheap Coulters.

All farmers have had trouble with their Coulters. In a few days they get to wabbling, are condemned and thrown aside. In our

"BOSS" Coulter

we furnish a tool which can scarcely be worn out; and when worn, the wearable parts, a prepared wood journal, and movable thimble in the hub (held in place by a key) can be easily and cheaply renewed. We guarantee our "BOSS" to plow more acres than any other three Coulters now used.

OUR "O. K." CLAMP

Attaches the Coulter to any size or kind of beam, either right or left hand plow. We know that after using it you will say it is the Best Tool on the market. Ask your dealer for it.

Manufactured by the BOSS COULTER CO., Bunker Hill, Ills.