Volume 2 — The Roosevelt Bears visit the ZOO

Said TEDDY-G, “The thing to do,”

As they reached the high fence round the Zoo,

In the early morning, about half-past two,

“Is to get in there with this load of cake

Before the keepers are wide awake.”

“You climb the fence,” said TEDDY-B,

“And throw this rope back here to me,

And pull up the baskets one by one

And we’ll land in there a good-sized ton

Of the finest cake that was ever made,

And strawberry tarts and lemonade

And cherry pie and sugar sticks

And red ice cream in good-sized bricks

And peanut candy and chocolate eclairs

And other things quite new to bears.”

“Don’t waste your time in telling me;

I bought these things,” said TEDDY-G;

And up he climbed, with business sense,

A tree which grew beside the fence,

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And out a limb and dropped below

And called out, “All right; I’m in; let go.”

And up went baskets two by two

Over the fence into the Zoo;

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And before the day began to break

The Bears had camped with their load of cake

On a grassy knoll where they couldn’t hide

And with dens and pens on every side.

“We’re in here now,” said TEDDY-B;

“What do you say we do?” said he.

“Let’s feed the animals,” said TEDDY-G;

“I move we let out two or three

And bring them here and feed them cake

And see just how our show will take;

And if they are pleased, why we’ll go round

And let loose everything on the ground.”

To the elephant house the two Bears went

And stirred up the biggest elephant,

And marched him over to their cake

Before he had time to get half awake.

“You mind these things,” said TEDDY-G,

“Our breakfast hour is half-past three.

If you are good you can have a snack

To keep you chewing till we come back.”

And they gave old Bolivar (that was his name)

Some things to eat till back they came.

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Copyright, 1907, by Edward Stern & Co., Inc. “‘You mind these things,’ said TEDDY-G, ‘Our breakfast hour is half-past three.’”

CXIXThen off they went to the monkey cage

Where monkeys of every size and age

Were using hands and feet and lungs

And saying good-morning in a thousand tongues.

TEDDY-B made them promise they’d be good

(At least that’s what he understood)

If he’d open the cage and let them out

And give them an hour to run about.

“We have,” said he, “some pie and cake

Which TEDDY-G will undertake

To serve out free in an hour or two

To every animal in the Zoo.

We’ll give you as much as you deserve

If you’ll act as waiters and help us serve.”

The monkeys grinned from ear to ear

And winked at each other a little queer,

And nodded their heads and seemed to say

That the two Bears’ orders they’d obey.

The cage was opened and the crowd went out,

Little and big, with laugh and shout,

Upsetting each other across the green,

The funniest bunch that was ever seen.

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The Bears went then to the beaver pond

And told the beavers if they were fond

Of good ice cream served by baboons

To bring on their tails to use for spoons.

They saw some foxes red and gray

And asked them to dine with them that day.

The wolves looked hungry and said they’d see

That all left over was given them free.

The rhinoceros couldn’t accept their treat;

He had some rheumatics in his feet.

But in a cage near-by a kangaroo

Jumped twenty feet when they let him through.

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An ostrich standing six feet high

Called out to the Bears as they went by

To hurry around with a piece of pie.

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Two mountain goats with curling horn

Said the mountain crest where they were born,

Their father rented just for thanks

To the Roosevelt Bears to play their pranks,

And this they thought was cause indeed

Why they should be asked to the morning feed.

A hedgehog and a porcupine

Were the next pair asked by the Bears to dine,

Then a dromedary chewing his cud

Said he wouldn’t budge from where he stood,

But if they’d bring him a piece of cake

He’d see if he liked their kind of bake.

From there they went to the animals’ cage

Where they found the tigers in a rage

And the lions roaring to beat the band

In language the Bears didn’t understand.

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A chimpanzee came near to see

And he made a face at TEDDY-G.

He was eating pie and said he feared

That their basket lunch had disappeared.

The Bears took warning and started back

To find ten keepers on their track,

And animals both big and small

Running wild on every mall,

And Bolivar with his trumpet loud

Calling for help to stop the crowd.

The monkeys had gone in a solid bunch

And captured the whole of the picnic lunch,

And out on limbs and high up on poles,

And on top of roofs and into holes,

And every monkey with cake or jam,

Or pie or tart or sandwich ham,

Or nuts or lemonade or cheese;

And Bolivar shaking poles and trees,

And hungry wolves and the kangaroo,

And mountain goats and a deer or two

Running wild from place to place,

Helping on the monkey chase.

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“The monkeys had gone in a solid bunch and captured the whole of the picnic lunch.”

CXXV’Twas noon that day when keepers ten

And a police brigade of fifty men,

And a hundred boys and firemen six

Got the monkey troupe to stop their tricks.

The Bears looked on throughout the show

And helped on the fun by laughing so

For TEDDY-G, since he was a cub,

Or at Bunker Hill down in the Hub,

Said that making fun seemed to be his forte

And that he never had such lively sport.

But the keeper made him change his laugh

When he locked them up with a big giraffe

And told them to stay and pay a fine

When the police court met next day at nine.

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