LEEDLE YAWCOB STRAUSS—WHAT HE SAYS.

Maype somedimes you don't half szeen Mine fahder told vhen he vas peen Szo vild almost as never vas Mit me; hees Leedle Yawcob Strauss, Und all apout thdose tings because Vit me he wasn't haf szome ease, Nor schmoke hees bipe, nor schleep in peese Nor eats szome schmall limburger scheese; Nor dakes hees peer nor saurkraout, Yen Leedle Yawcob was apout. Vell now! I shbiel hees lager peer? Mine gootness! dot ish very queer; Don't I haf seen him mit his handt, Tdake vup some glass of lager, andt Schoost ash he schmell him mit hees eye, Shbiel him all in hees schtoomach? vy, He shbiel more lager peer don I, Andt thden he laff, und dance, und szing, More like some poys don anythding. I took der meezles; vell I shbose Dot thdere vas blenty left of thdose; I poots der schnuff inder hees kraout, So it make him don't scheeze so loudt, I haf der mumps; vot if I is? Mine vace don't got szer far abart Nor pe szo pig nor redt as his. Und thden apout those limburg scheese; Vell thdere I dhink dot I agrees Mit him, dot it vos szomevat rouff, But thden he szay vonce, dat enough Vas schoost so petter nor a veest, Und szo I think he kouldn't got Enough, so scheap und quivck ash vot He haf mit hees bipe full off dot. Thdose milk-ban dot I learn to blay, I get dot drouble in thdis way: Poot pottom up across my knee, Schoost ash I szeen him do to me, I tumps upon him mit ter stdick, Und make der music pooty qvick; Vy ish it dot hees hed't vas shblit Vith sooch a leedle noise, ven it Don't preak oup mit der noise dot he Make, ven he tump dot stdick on me? Put ven I ask apout szome thdings, Vot make hees nose szo redt, and prings Der schoomth shbot oudt mitin his hedt; I shbose dot I shall know apout All of thdose thdings—ven I findt out, Und szo I vait avhile, and szee Vot der next drouble ish to pe, Und if der meeschiefs thdake this blace, I brays like vot dot fahder says Tdake everyding dots in thdis house, Put leave thdis leedle Yawcob Strauss. Arthur Dakin.