AMPHITRVO AMPHITRYON (continued 2)

Sos.Sos.

Ubi ego audiverim? Heard you? Where?

Amph.Amph.

Hanc roga. (sullenly) Ask her.

Sos.Sos.

Me quidem praesente numquam factum est, quod sciam. You never did so far as I know, leastways with me at hand.

Alc.Alc.

Mirum quin te adversus dicat. (ironically) It is strange he declines to contradict his own master.

Amph.Amph.

750 Sosia, age me huc aspice. Sosia, here! Look me in the eye.

Sos.Sos.

Specto. (obeying) Very good, sir.

Amph.Amph.

Vera volo loqui te, nolo adsentari mihi. audivistin tu hodie me illi dicere ea quae illa autumat? What I want from you is the truth, no obsequiousness. Did you ever hear me utter a syllable of what she says?

Sos.Sos.

Quaeso edepol, num tu quoque etiam insanis, quom id me interrogas, qui ipsus equidem nunc primum istanc tecum conspicio simul? Well, upon my word, I should like to ask if you are not crazy yourself, asking me a question like that—and I just this minute setting eyes on her for the first time along with you?

Amph.Amph.

Quid nunc, mulier? audin illum? What now, madam? Do you hear him?

Alc.Alc.

Ego vero, ac falsum dicere. To be sure I do—telling lies.

Amph.Amph.

Neque tu illi neque mihi viro ipsi credis? You won't believe him, or me, your own husband, either?

Alc.Alc.

Eo fit quia mihi plurimum credo et scio istaec facta proinde ut proloquor. That is only because I believe myself most of all, and I know everything occurred just as I tell you.

Amph.Amph.

Tun me heri advenisse dicis? And you say that I arrived yesterday?

Alc.Alc.

Tun te abiisse hodie hinc negas? And you deny that you left to-day?

Amph.Amph.

Nego enim vero, et me advenire nunc primum aio ad te domum. Deny it? Of course I do. And I say I'm just now coming home to you for the first time.

Alc.Alc.

760 Obsecro, etiamne hoc negabis, te auream pateram mihi dedisse dono hodie, qua te illi donatum esse dixeras? And will you deny this, too, pray,—that you gave me the golden bowl to-day that was presented to you there, as you said?

Amph.Amph.

Neque edepol dedi neque dixi; verum ita animatus fui itaque nunc sum, ut ea te patera donem. sed quis istuc tibi dixit? By heaven! I neither gave it nor said it. But I did intend to make you a gift of that bowl, and do still. Who told you of that, though?

Alc.Alc.

Ego equidem ex te audivi et ex tua accepi manu pateram. Why, I heard about it from your own lips and received the bowl from your own hand.

Amph.Amph.

Mane, mane, obsecro te. nimis demiror, Sosia, qui illaec illic me donatum esse aurea patera sciat, nisi tu dudum hanc convenisti et narravisti haec omnia. One moment, please, one moment! (turning to Sosia) It is very extraordinary. Sosia, how she knows I was presented with a golden bowl there, unless you met her a while ago yourself and told her the whole story.

Sos.Sos.

Neque edepol ego dixi neque istam vidi nisi tecum simul. By gad, sir, I never told her, no, nor saw her, except here with you.

Amph.Amph.

Quid hoc sit hominis? (helplessly) What sort of a creature have I got here?

Alc.Alc.

Vin proferri pateram? Would you like to have the bowl brought?

Amph.Amph.

Proferri volo. Indeed I should.

Alc.Alc.

770 Fiat heus tu, Thessala, intus pateram proferto foras, qua hodie meus vir donavit me. Very well. (calling to maid within) Ho, there! Thessala, bring out the bowl my husband gave me to day.

Amph.Amph.

Secede huc tu, Sosia, enim vero illud praeter alia mira miror maxime, si haec habet pateram illam. Sosia! Come over here. (they withdraw somewhat) Upon my soul, it will be the most astounding of all these astounding circumstances, if she has that.

Sos.Sos.

An etiam credis id, quae in hac cistellula tuo signo obsignata fertur? Do you really believe that, sir, when I've got it in this little chest here, sealed with your own signet?

Amph.Amph.

Salvom signum est? Is the seal intact?

Sos.Sos.

Inspice. (showing chest) Look and see.

Amph.Amph.

Recte, ita est ut obsignavi. (doing so) It is all right—just as I sealed it.

Sos.Sos.

Quaeso, quin tu istanc iubes pro cerrita circumferri? For heaven's sake, why don't you have her treated for lunacy?

Amph.Amph.

Edepol qui facto est opus; nam haec quidem edepol larvarum plenast. By Jove, so I should! Why, bless my soul, she's full of evil spirits! enter Thessala with bowl.

Alc.Alc.

Quid verbis opust? em tibi pateram, eccam. Are you satisfied, sir? There! Your bowl, see!

Amph.Amph.

Cedo mi. (dumbfounded) Give it here!

Alc.Alc.

Age aspice huc sis nunciam tu qui quae facta infitiare, quem ego iam hic convincam palam estne haec patera qua donatu's illi? Come now, be so good as to look at it, you that do a thing and then disown it. I shall refute you plainly, sir, here and now. Is this the bowl which they presented to you there, or not?

Amph.Amph.

Summe Iuppiter, quid ego video? haec ea est profecto patera. perii, Sosia. (taking it) Jove almighty! What do I see? The selfsame bowl, it is, it is! This is frightful, Sosia!

Sos.Sos.

Aut pol haec praestigiatrix multo mulier maxima est aut pateram hic inesse oportet. By gad, she's either the greatest enchantress alive, easily, or the bowl must be inside here. (pointing to chest)

Amph.Amph.

Agedum, exsolve cistulam. Come, come, unfasten the chest!

Sos.Sos.

Quid ego istam exsolvam? obsignatast recte, res gesta est bene: tu peperisti Amphitruonem, ego alium peperi Sosiam; nunc si patera pateram peperit, omnes congeminavimus. Unfasten it? Why? It's sealed all right, everything is shipshape. You have spawned another Amphitryon; I have spawned another Sosia; now if the bowl has spawned another bowl, we've all doubled.

Amph.Amph.

Certum est aperire atque inspicere. I'm resolved: it must be opened and inspected.

Sos.Sos.

Vide sis signi quid siet, ne posterius in me culpam conferas. You please take a look at the seal, sir, so that you won't blame me later.

Amph.Amph.

Aperi modo; nam haec quidem nos delirantis facere dictis postulat. (looking) Yes, yes, open up! Why, the woman is bent on driving us mad with her talk.

Alc.Alc.

Unde haec igitur est nisi abs te quae mihi dono data est? Where did this come from, then, if not as a present from you?

Amph.Amph.

Opus mi est istuc exquisito. (curtly) This matter needs my investigation.

Sos.Sos.

Iuppiter, pro Iuppiter. (busy with chest) By Jove! Oh, by Jove!

Amph.Amph.

Quid tibi est? (excited) What is it?

Sos.Sos.

Hic patera nulla in cistulast. There's no bowl in the chest here at all!

Amph.Amph.

Quid ego audio? What's that you say?

Sos.Sos.

Id quod verumst. It's the honest truth.

Amph.Amph.

At cum cruciatu iam, nisi apparet, tuo. But your skin shall soon pay for it, if it's not forthcoming.

Alc.Alc.

Haec quidem apparet. This one is forthcoming, at any rate.

Amph.Amph.

Quis igitur tibi dedit? (roughly) Who gave it you, then?

Alc.Alc.

Qui me rogat. (calmly) My questioner.

Sos.Sos.

Me captas, quia tute ab navi clanculum huc alia via praecucurristi, atque hinc pateram tute exemisti atque eam huic dedisti, post hanc rursum obsignasti clanculum. (to Amphitryon) Trying to catch me! The fact is you ran on ahead from the ship yourself by another road on the sly, and took the bowl out yourself, and gave it to her, and then sealed up the chest again on the sly.

Amph.Amph.

Ei mihi, iam tu quoque huius adiuvas insaniam? an heri nos advenisse huc? Oh, ye gods! So now you are abetting her delusions, too! (to Alcmena, with forced calmness) We came here yesterday, you say?

Alc.Alc.

Aio, adveniensque ilico 800 me salutavisti, et ego te, et osculum tetuli tibi. Yes, and the moment you arrived you greeted me, and I you, and I gave you a kiss.

Sos.Sos.

Iam illud non placet principium de osculo. Now I don't like that, that beginning with a kiss!

Amph.Amph.

Perge exsequi. Go on, go on!

Alc.Alc.

Lavisti. Then you bathed.

Amph.Amph.

Quid postquam lavi? And after bathing?

Alc.Alc.

Accubuisti. You took your place on the dining couch.

Sos.Sos.

Euge optime, nunc exquire. Bravo, sir! Great work! Now get to the bottom of it.

Amph.Amph.

Ne interpella. perge porro dicere. (to Sosia) No interruptions! (to Alcmena) Go on with your story.

Alc.Alc.

Cena adposita est, cenavisti mecum, ego accubui simul. Dinner was served: we dined together: I took my place on the couch, too.

Amph.Amph.

In eodem lecto? The same couch?

Alc.Alc.

In eodem. Surely.

Sos.Sos.

Ei, non placet convivium. Oho! This banqueting looks bad!

Amph.Amph.

Sine modo argumenta dicat. quid postquam cenavimus? (to Sosia) That will do. Let her state her case. (to Alcmena) What after we dined?

Alc.Alc.

Te dormitare aibas, mensa ablata est. cubitum hinc abiimus. You said you were sleepy: the table was removed: we went off to bed.

Amph.Amph.

Ubi tu cubuisti? Where did you sleep?

Alc.Alc.

In eodem lecto tecum una in cubiculo. Why, with you, in our room.

Amph.Amph.

Perdidisti. Oh, my God!

Sos.Sos.

Quid tibi est? What ails you?

Amph.Amph.

Haec me modo ad mortem dedit. She has killed me, killed me!

Alc.Alc.

Quid iam, amabo? Why, my dear man, what do you mean?

Amph.Amph.

Ne me appella. (furiously) Don't speak to me!

Sos.Sos.

Quid tibi est? What ails you?

Amph.Amph.

810 Perii miser, quia pudicitiae huius vitium me hinc absente est additum. Oh, God help me! She's been seduced while I was gone!

Alc.Alc.

Obsecro ecastor, cur istuc, mi vir, ex ted audio? Good heavens! For mercy's sake how can you say such a thing, my dear husband?

Amph.Amph.

Vir ego tuos sim? ne me appella, falsa, falso nomine. Am I your husband? Oh, you false wretch, none of your false names for me!

Sos.Sos.

Haeret haec res, si quidem haec iam mulier facta est ex viro. Here's a pretty mess, if he is turned into a woman and is not her husband!

Alc.Alc.

Quid ego feci, qua istaec propter dicta dicantur mihi? What have I done to be talked to like that?

Amph.Amph.

Tute edictas facta tua, ex me quaeris quid deliqueris. You have recounted your doings yourself—and you ask me what the harm is!

Alc.Alc.

Quid ego tibi deliqui, si, cum nupta sum, tecum fui? Pray tell me what I have done in being with you, the man I married?

Amph.Amph.

Tun mecum fueris? quid illac impudente audacius? saltem, tute si pudoris egeas, sumas mutuom. You with me? Of all brazen shamelessness! You might at least borrow some sense of decency, if you have none of your own!

Alc.Alc.

820 Istuc facinus, quod tu insimulas, nostro generi non decet. tu si me inpudicitiai captas, capere non potes. Such behaviour as you accuse me of does not become members of my family, sir. Angle for me if you wish, you cannot catch me in such unspeakable conduct.

Amph.Amph.

Pro di immortales, cognoscin tu me saltem, Sosia? Great God! You know me, anyhow, Sosia, don't you?

Sos.Sos.

Propemodum. Well, rather!

Amph.Amph.

Cenavin ego heri in navi in portu Persico? Didn't I dine yesterday on shipboard at Port Persicus?

Alc.Alc.

Mihi quoque adsunt testes, qui illud quod ego dicam adsentiant. Yes, and I too have witnesses to corroborate what I say.

Sos.Sos.

Nescio quid istuc negoti dicam, nisi si quispiam est Amphitruo alius, qui forte ted hinc absenti tamen tuam rem curet teque absente hic munus fungatur tuom. nam quod de illo subditivo Sosia mirum nimis, certe de istoc Amphitruone iam alterum mirum est magis. I can't puzzle it out, sir, unless there's some other Amphitryon to manage your business, no matter if you are away, and to do your job for you when you have gone. I tell you what, that sham Sosia was monstrous surprising, but this second Amphitryon is certainly more so.

Amph.Amph.

830 Nescio quis praestigiator hanc frustratur mulierem. Some magician or other has bedevilled the woman!

Alc.Alc.

Per supremi regis regnum iuro et matrem familias Iunonem, quam me vereri et metuere est par maxume, ut mi extra unum te mortalis nemo corpus corpore contigit, quo me impudicam faceret. (slowly and impressively) I swear by the kingdom of the King on high and by Juno, the matron goddess I most should reverence and fear—so may she bless me as no mortal man, save you only, has taken me to him as a wife.

Amph.Amph.

Vera istaec velim. Ah, I wish it was the truth!

Alc.Alc.

Vera dico, sed nequiquam, quoniam non vis credere. It is the truth, but what of that, when you refuse to believe me!

Amph.Amph.

Mulier es, audacter iuras. You're a woman; you swear boldly.

Alc.Alc.

Quae non deliquit, decet audacem esse, confidenter pro se et proterve loqui. A woman who has done nothing wrong ought to be bold, yes, and self confident and forward in her own defence.

Amph.Amph.

Satis audacter. Bold, with a vengeance!

Alc.Alc.

Ut pudicam decet. As innocence should be.

Amph.Amph.

Enim verbis proba's.²¹ Yes, you're immaculate as far as talk goes.

Alc.Alc.

Non ego illam mihi dotem duco esse, quae dos dicitur, 840 sed pudicitiam et pudorem et sedatum cupidinem, deum metum, parentum amorem et cognatum concordiam, tibi morigera atque ut munifica sim bonis, prosim probis. (quietly) Personally I do not feel that my dowry is that which people call a dowry, but purity and honour and self control, fear of God, love of parents, and affection for my family, and being a dutiful wife to you, sir, lavish of loving-kindness and helpful through honest service.

Sos.Sos.

Ne ista edepol, si haec vera loquitur, examussim est optima. My word! She's a regular pattern of perfection, if she's telling the truth.

Amph.Amph.

Delenitus sum profecto ita, ut me qui sim nesciam. Upon my soul, I have been so bewitched I don't know who I am!

Sos.Sos.

Amphitruo es profecto, cave sis ne tu te usu perduis: ita nunc homines immutantur, postquam peregre advenimus. You're Amphitryon right enough, sir—but just look out you don't lose your title to yourself by limitation, the way folks are getting changed about these days since we came back from abroad.

Amph.Amph.

Mulier, istam rem inquisitam certum est non amittere. (to Alcmena, sternly) This matter shall not escape investigation, madam, I am resolved on that.

Alc.Alc.

Edepol me libente facies. Dear me, sir, do investigate, and welcome!

Amph.Amph.

Quid ais? responde mihi. quid si adduco tuom cognatum huc ab navi Naucratem, 850 qui mecum una vectust una navi, atque is si denegat facta quae tu facta dicis, quid tibi aequom est fieri? numquid causam dicis, quin te hoc multem matrimionio? See here, answer me this—what if I bring your own relative, Naucrates, over from the ship? He made the voyaage with me on the same vessel—now if he denies that I did as you say what do you deserve? Have you any reason to give that I should not divorce you?

Alc.Alc.

Si deliqui, nulla causa est. None, if I have done wrong.

Amph.Amph.

Convenit. tu, Sosia, duc hos intro. ego huc ab navi mecum adducam Naucratem. Agreed! (turning to Sosia) Sosia, take these fellows in. (pointing to slaves with luggage) I will bring Naucrates here from the ship. (Sosia sends slaves inside) [exit Amphitryon.

Sos.Sos.

Nunc quidem praeter nos nemo est. dic mihi verum serio: ecquis alius Sosia intust, qui mei similis siet? (to Alcmena, confidentially) Now then, ma'am, no one's here besides us. (elaborately makes sure of it) Do be serious and tell me the truth—is there another Sosia inside who's just like me?

Alc.Alc.

Abin hinc a me dignus domino servos? (indignantly) Will you leave my sight, sir—you slave worthy of your master!

Sos.Sos.

Abeo, si iubes. Sure, ma'am, if you say so. [exit into house.

Alc.Alc.

Nimis ecastor facinus mirum est, qui illi conlibitum siet meo viro sic me insimulare falso facinus tam malum. 860 quicquid est, iam ex Naucrate cognato id cognoscam meo. Merciful heavens! It's simply unintelligible, how my husband could think fit to accuse me of such atrocious conduct without the slightest cause. Well, whatever it is, I shall soon know about it from Naucrates, one of my own family. [exit into house.

ACTVS III ACT III

Iup.Jup.

Ego sum ille Amphitruo, cui est servos Sosia. idem Mercurius qui fit, quando commodumst, in superiore qui habito cenaculo, qui interdum fio Iuppiter, quando lubet; huc autem quom extemplo adventum adporto, ilico Amphitruo fio et vestitum immuto meum. (in jocular, self-satisfied tone) I am that Amphitryon who has a servant Sosia, which same turns into Mercury on occasion, I being the Amphitryon who lodge in the upper attic (pointing heavenward) and become Jupiter at times, when the humour seizes me. As soon as I wend my way into these parts, however, on the spot I am Amphitryon and change my clothes.

nunc huc honoris vostri venio gratia, ne hanc incohatam transigam comoediam; simul Alcumenae, quam vir insontem probri 870 Amphitruo accusat, veni ut auxilium feram: nam mea sit culpa, quod egomet contraxerim, si id Alcumenae innocenti expetat. I now appear out of regard for you, so as not to terminate this inchoate comedy. At the same time I am here to help out Alcmena, poor innocent, denounced as disloyal by her lord, Amphitryon. For it would be sinful of me, if the storm I have brewed should descend on the head of guileless Alcmena.

nunc Amphitruonem memet, ut occepi semel, esse adsimulabo, atque in horum familiam frustrationem hodie iniciam maxumam; post igitur demum faciam res fiat palam atque Alcumenae in tempore auxilium feram faciamque ut uno fetu et quod gravida est viro et me quod gravidast pariat sine doloribus. 880 Mercurium iussi me continue consequi, si quid vellem imperare. nunc hanc adloquar. I will pretend for the present to be Amphitryon myself, as I have already, and thoroughly confound this family to-day, Then, after that, I will eventually clear matters up, yes, and aid Alcmena in due season, contriving that she give birth at one time to both the children she carries, her husband's and my own, without a pang. Mercury has his orders to attend me closely, in case I have commands to give. Now for a word with the lady.

III. 2. Scene 2

enter Alcmena from house.

Alc.Alc.

Durare nequeo in aedibus. ita me probri, stupri, dedecoris a viro argutam meo! ea quae sunt facta infecta ut reddat clamitat. quae neque sunt facta neque ego in me admisi arguit; atque id me susque deque esse habituram putat. I can't stand staying in the house! To be branded so with shame, disloyalty, disgrace, by my own husband! How he clamours to make facts no facts! And what never happened, things I never, never did, he accuses me of, and thinks I'll consider it quite immaterial.

non edepol faciam, neque me perpetiar probri falso insimulatam, quin ego illum aut deseram aut satis faciat mi ille atque adiuret insuper, 890 nolle esse dicta quae in me insontem protulit. Good gracious, but I won't! I won't endure such an awful, unjustified accusation: I will leave him, or he must apologize, one or the other, yes, and swear he is sorry, too, for the things he has said to an innocent woman.

Iup.Jup.

Faciundum est mi illud, fieri quod illaec postulat, si me illam amantem ad sese studeam recipere, quando ego quod feci, id factum Amphitruoni offuit atque illi dudum meus amor negotium insonti exhibuit, nunc autem insonti mihi illius ira in hanc et male dicta expetent. (aside, dryly) Hm! It's incumbent upon me to meet her demands, if I wish the loving creature to take me into her good graces again. Since my doings offended Amphitryon, and this love affair of mine lately occasioned his guiltless self some consternation, it is turn about now, and my guiltless self has to suffer for the scorn and contumely he heaped on her.

Alc.Alc.

Sed eccum video qui me miseram arguit stupri, dedecoris. (aside, seeing him) Ah, there he is—the man that charges his wretched wife with disloyalty and shame!

Iup.Jup.

Te volo, uxor, conloqui. quo te avortisti?²² I wish to speak with you, my dear. (circling her as she turns her back on him) Turned away? Where to?

Alc.Alc.

Ita ingenium meumst: 900 inimicos semper osa sum optuerier. It is natural I should, sir: I always loathed looking at enemies.

Iup.Jup.

Heia autem inimicos? Oh, I say now! Enemies?

Alc.Alc.

Sic est, vera praedico; nisi etiam hoc falso dici insimulaturus es. Yes, enemies: and that's the truth of it—unless you intend to term this a lie, too.

Iup.Jup.

Nimis iracunda es. (trying to fondle her) You're too irritable.

Alc.Alc.

Potin ut abstineas manum? nam certo, si sis sanus aut sapias satis, quam tu impudicam esse arbitrere et praedices, cum ea tu sermonem nec ioco nec serio tibi habeas, nisi sis stultior stultissimo. (pulling away) Can't you keep your hands off? Why surely, sir, if you were sane or had a particle of sense about you, when you think your wife is immodest and tell her so yourself, you wouldn't hold any conversation with her at all in jest or earnest, unless you were the silliest of silly men.

Iup.Jup.

Si dixi, nihilo magis es, neque ego esse arbitror, et id huc revorti uti me purgarem tibi. 910 nam numquam quicquam meo animo fuit aegrius, quam postquam audivi ted esse iratam mihi. cur dixisti? inquies. ego expediam tibi. My saying so doesn't make you so any the more, And I don't think you so, either; and I've come back to set myself right with you. For I never did feel sicker at heart about anything than after I heard you were provoked with me. "Why did you say it?" you'll ask. I'll clear up that point for you.

non edepol quo te esse impudicam crederem; verum periclitatus sum animum tuom, quid faceres et quo pacto id ferre induceres. equidem ioco illa dixeram dudum tibi, ridiculi causa. vel hunc rogato Sosiam. Bless your heart, it wasn't because I believed you were immodest. I was just testing your feelings to see what you'd do and how you'd take it. (forcing a laugh) Really it was all a joke, what I said just now, merely a bit of fun. Why, you can ask Sosia here. (pointing to house)

Alc.Alc.

Quin huc adducis meum cognatum Naucratem, testem quem dudum te adducturum dixeras, te huc non venisse? (coldly) Why do you not bring my relative Naucrates, as you just now said you would, to prove you had not been here?

Iup.Jup.

920 Si quid dictum est per iocum, non aequom est id te serio praevortier. If something is said in joke, it's not fair to take it in earnest.

Alc.Alc.

Ego illud scio quam doluerit cordi meo. I know one thing—that joke of yours cut me to the heart, sir.

Iup.Jup.

Per dexteram tuam te, Alcumena, oro obsecro. da mihi hanc veniam, ignosce, irata ne sies. (seizing her hand) I beg and beseech you, Alcmena, by this right hand of yours, do forgive me for it; pardon me: don't be angry!

Alc.Alc.

Ego istaec feci verba virtute irrita; nunc, quando factis me impudicis abstini, ab impudicis dictis avorti volo. valeas, tibi habeas res tuas, reddas meas. iuben mi ire comites Your charges are refuted by my honest life; now, sir, having been guiltless of gross behaviour, I will not be subjected to gross language. Good bye. Keep your own things and return me mine. Will you older my attendants to follow me? (turns to go)

Iup.Jup.

Sanan es? Are you in your senses?

Alc.Alc.

Si non iubes, ibo egomet; comitem mihi Pudicitiam duxero.²³ 930 If you decline to do so, I will go with my woman's honour as my only escort. (walks away)

Iup.Jup.

Mane. arbitratu tuo ius iurandum dabo, me meam pudicam esse uxorem arbitrarier. id ego si fallo, tum te, summe Iuppiter, quaeso, Amphitruoni ut semper iratus sies. (holding her) Wait, wait! I'll swear to it—at your dictation—that I believe my wife is virtuous. If I deceive you in this, then, Jove almighty, I invoke thy curse upon Amphitryon for evermore.

Alc.Alc.

A, propitius sit potius. (hurriedly) Oh no! His blessing, his blessing!

Iup.Jup.

Confido fore; nam ius iurandum verum te advorsum dedi. iam nunc irata non es? I trust to have it, for it is a reliable oath I have given you. (drawing her close) Now you're not angry, are you?

Alc.Alc.

Non sum. (submitting) No.

Iup.Jup.

Bene facis. nam in hominum aetate multa eveniunt huius modi: capiunt voluptates, capiunt rursum miserias; 940 irae interveniunt, redeunt rursum in gratiam. verum irae si quae forte eveniunt huius modi inter eos, rursum si reventum in gratiam est, bis tanto amici sunt inter se quam prius. (caressing her) That's a good girl. Why, life is full of incidents of this sort. Human beings lay hold on pleasures and then again on pains. Quarrels come between them, and then they are reconciled again. But if any such quarrel as this does happen to arise between them, then when it blows over they are twice as fond of one another as they were before.

Alc.Alc.

Primum cavisse oportuit ne diceres, verum eadem si isdem purgas mi, patiunda sunt. You should have been careful not to say such a thing in the first place; but if you apologize so nicely for hurting me so, I can't complain.

Iup.Jup.

Iube vero vasa pura adornari mihi, ut quae apud legionem vota vovi. si domum rediissem salvos, ea ego exsolvam omnia. Well, well, then, have the sacrificial vessel prepared for me so that I can pay all the vows I vowed for a safe return home when I was in the field.

Alc.Alc.

Ego istuc curabo. I will attend to that.

Iup.Jup.

Evocate huc Sosiam; 950 gubernatorem, qui in mea navi fuit Blepharonem arcessat, qui nobiscum prandeat is adeo²⁴ inpransus ludificabitur, cum ego Amphitruonem collo hinc obstricto traham. (to maids in doorway) Call Sosia out. I want him to invite Blepharo, the pilot aboard my ship, to lunch with us. (exeunt maids) (aside) As a matter of fact, friend Blepharo will be left unlunched and looking foolish when I turn Amphitryon out neck and crop.

Alc.Alc.

Mirum quid solus secum secreto ille agat. atque aperiuntur aedis. exit Sosia. (aside) I wonder what he's talking about all to himself! Ah, there goes the door! Sosia's coming out.

III. 3. Scene 3.

enter Sosia.

Sos.Sos.

Amphitruo, assum. si quid opus est, impera, imperium exequar. Present, sir. If anything's needed, order away and I'll fulfil orders.

Iup.Jup.

Sosia, optume advenis. Sosia, you are the very man I want.

Sos.Sos.

Iam pax est inter vos duos? nam quia vos tranquillos video, gaudeo et volup est mihi. atque ita servom par videtur frugi sese instituere 960 proinde eri ut sint, ipse item sit; voltum e voltu comparet tristis sit, si eri sint tristes; hilarus sit, si gaudeant sed age responde: iam vos rediistis in concordiam? Is there peace between you two now, sir? I tell you what, it's a pleasure, it's a joy, to see you looking peaceful. Yes, and to my way of thinking, an honest servant ought to stick to this principle: be like what his betters are, model his expression on theirs, be in the dumps if they are in the dumps, and jolly if they are happy. But come, sir, answer me. Have you made friends again now, eh?

Iup.Jup.

Derides, qui scis haec dudum me dixisse per iocum. (reprovingly) Mocker! What I said a while ago was all in fun, and you know it.

Sos.Sos.

An id ioco dixisti? equidem serio ac vero ratus. In fun, was it? Upon my soul, I thought it was the solemn truth.

Iup.Jup.

Habui expurigationem; facta pax est. I have explained: peace is made.

Sos.Sos.

Optume est. That's grand, sir.

Iup.Jup.

Ego rem divinam intus faciam, vota quae sunt. I will make those offerings I vowed, inside.

Sos.Sos.

Censeo. Very good, sir.

Iup.Jup.

Tu gubernatorem a navi huc evoca verbis meis Blepharonem, qui re divina facta mecum prandeat. As for you, convey my invitation to Pilot Blepharo to come over from the ship and lunch with me after the sacrifice is done.

Sos.Sos.

Iam hic ero, cum illic censebis esse me. I'll be here by the time you think I'm there, sir.

Iup.Jup.

Actutum huc redi. Yes, hurry back home. [exit Sosia.

Alc.Alc.

970 Numquid vis, quin abeam iam intro, ut apparentur quibus opust? Is there anything else, or shall I go in now and see to the things you'll need?

Iup.Jup.

I sane, et quantum potest parata fac sint omnia. Do, by all means, and get everything ready as quickly as you can.

Alc.Alc.

Quin venis quando vis intro? faxo haud quicquam sit morae. Come in as soon as you wish. I'll make sure there's nothing to delay you.

Iup.Jup.

Recte loquere et proinde diligentem ut uxorem decet. iam hisce ambo, et servos et era, frustra sunt duo, qui me Amphitruonem rentur esse: errant probe. nunc tu divine huc fac adsis Sosia— audis quae dico, tam etsi praesens non ades— fac Amphitruonem advenientem ab aedibus ut abigas; quovis pacto fac commentus sis. (tenderly) That's the way for an attentive wife to talk. [exit Alcmena. There we are! Both of 'em fooled, servant and mistress, took in thinking me Amphitryon. A sad mistake! Hark ye, Sosia the divine, appear! You hear what I say, even though absent in the flesh. Drive Amphitryon away from the house when he arrives—any device you please.

980 volo deludi illunc, dum cum hac usuraria uxore nunc mihi morigero. haec curata sint fac sis, proinde adeo ut velle med intellegis, atque ut ministres mihi, mihi cum sacruficem. He must be hoodwinked while I proceed to divert myself with my wife on loan. Kindly see that this is managed precisely as you know I wish it to be, and do me service while I am sacrificing to myself. [exit Jupiter.

III. 4. Scene 4.

enter Mercury hurriedly with burlesque importance.

Mer.Mer.

Concedite atque abscedite omnes, de via decedite, nec quisquam tam audax fuat homo, qui obviam obsistat mihi. nam mihi quidem hercle qui minus liceat deo minitarier populo, ni decedat mihi, quam servolo in comoediis? ille navem salvam nuntiat aut irati adventum senis: ego sum Iovi dicto audiens, eius iussu nunc huc me adfero. 990 quam ob rem mihi magis par est via decedere et concedere. (to imaginary passers-by) Get away, get out, get off the street, every one! Let no man be so bold as to block my path. (to audience) For damme, just tell me why a god like me hasn't as much right to hector people that hinder him as your paltry slave in the comedies? He brings word the ship is safe, or the choleric old man approaching: (magnificently) as for me, I hearken to the word of Jove and at his bidding do I now hie me hither. Wherefore 'tis still more seemly to get out, to get off the street for me.

pater vocat me, eum sequor, eius dicto imperio sum audiens; ut filium bonum patri esse oportet, itidem ego sum patri. amanti sub parasitor, hortor, adsto, admoneo, gaudeo. si quid patri volup est, voluptas ea mihi multo maxumast. My father calls me; I come, obedient to his best and will. (confidingly) I am a good son to my father, as a son should be. I back him up in his gallantries, encourage him, stand by him, advise him, rejoice with him. If anything gratifies my father, it gratifies me infinitely more.

amat: sapit; recte facit, animo quando obsequitur suo, quod omnis homines facere oportet, dum id modo fiat bono. nunc Amphitruonem volt deludi meus pater: faxo probe iam his deludetur, spectatores, vobis inspectantibus. He's in love: he's wise; he does well to indulge his inclinations. It is what every one ought to do, that is within due bounds. At present my father wishes Amphitryon to be fooled: fooled he shall be finely, I promise you, here and now, spectators, and under your inspection.

capiam coronam mi ni caput, adsimulabo me esse ebrium; 1000 atque illuc sursum escendero: inde optume aspellam virum de supero, cum huc accesserit; faciam ut sit madidus sobrius. deinde illi actutum sufferet suos servos poenas Sosia: eum fecisse ille hodie arguet quae ego fecero hic. quid mea? meo me aequomst morigerum patri, eius studio servire addecet. I'm going to put a garland on my head and make believe I'm drunk, yes, and I'll climb out on the roof yonder (pointing to Amphitryon's house) and repel our returning hero in glorious style from up above there. I'll see that he's both soaked and sober. Then that servant Sosia of his shall promptly smart for it, Sosia being accused of doing what I do here. But what of that? I must humour my own father: it is only dutiful to meet his desires.

sed eccum Amphitruonem, advenit; iam ille hic deludetur probe, siquidem vos voltis auscultando operam dare. ibo intro, ornatum capiam qui potis decet; dein susum ascendam in tectum, ut illum hinc prohibeam. (looking down street) But there's Amphitryon coming! Here and now he'll be finely fooled—if you'll only take the trouble to attend. I'll go inside and make up as a person flown with wine; then I'll up on the roof to keep him off. [exit into house.

ACTVS IV ACT IV

enter Amphitryon wearily.

Amph.Amph.

Naucratem quem convenire volui, in navi non erat, 1010 neque domi neque in urbe invenio quemquam qui illum viderit. nam omnis plateas perreptavi, gymnasia et myropolia; apud emporium atque in macello, in palaestra atque in foro, in medicinis, in tonstrinis, apud omnis aedis sacras sum defessus quaeritando. nusquam invenio Naucratem. Naucrates, whom I wanted to get hold of wasn't on the ship, and not a soul can I find at his house or in the city who has seen him. Why, I've hobbled through every street, gymnasium, and perfumery shop: down in the bazaar and the market, at the athletic field and the forum, too, at the doctor's, the barber's, the holy temples from first to last,—I'm tired to death looking for him and not a sign of Naucrates anywhere.

nunc domum ibo atque ex uxore hanc rem pergam exquirere, quis fuerit quem propter corpus suom stupri compleverit nam me, quam illam quaestionem inquisitam hodie amittere, mortuom satrust. sed aedis occluserunt. eugepae, pariter hoc fit atque ut alia facta sunt. feriam foris. 1020 aperite hoc. heus, ecquis hic est? ecquis hoc aperit ostium? Now I'm going home and ask my wife some more questions about this, and (savagely) find out who it is she has prostituted herself for. Ah, I'd sooner die than let the day pass without having this matter settled. (trying door) Well! they've locked up the house! Nice doings! Quite in accord with the rest of it. I'll knock. (does so) Open up here! Hey! is anyone in? Open—somebody! (knocks more lustily)

IV. 2. Scene 2.

Mercury, much disheveled, appears on roof.

Mer.Mer.

Quis ad fores est? (thickly) Who's at the door?

Amph.Amph.

Ego sum. I am.

Mer.Mer.

Quid ego sum? I am, eh?

Amph.Amph.

Ita loquor. (sharply) So I say.

Mer.Mer.

Tibi Iuppiter dique omnes nati certo sunt, qui sic frangas fores. Jupiter and ... all the ... gods ... are surely angry at you ... demolishing our door so.

Amph.Amph.

Quo modo? What do you mean!

Mer.Mer.

Eo modo, ut profecto vivas aetatem miser. Here's ... what I mean ... you're certainly going to have a bad, bad time of it.

Amph.Amph.

Sosia. (sternly) Sosia!

Mer.Mer.

Ita, sum Sosia, nisi me esse oblitum existimas. quid nunc vis? Just so! That's me ... unless you think I've forgotten. Now what do ... you want?

Amph.Amph.

Sceleste, at etiam quid velim, id tu me rogas. Rascal! Do you actually dare ask me that—what I want?

Mer.Mer.

Ita, rogo. paene effregisti, fatue, foribus cardines an foris censebas nobis publicitus praeberier? quid me aspectas, stolide? quid nunc vis tibi? aut quid tu es homo? Of course I do. You've almost hammered the doors off their hinges, you ... stupid. Didn't suppose we were supplied with doors at public expense, did you? What are you staring at me for, you ... booby? What are you after now? Who are you?

Amph.Amph.

Verbero, etiam quis ego sim me rogitas, ulmorum Acheruns? 1030 quem pol ego hodie ob istaec dicta faciam ferventem flagris. You scoundrel! Still asking me who I am, you death on rods, you? By gad, I'll warm you up with a whip to day for this insolence!

Mer.Mer.

Prodigum te fuisse oportet olim in adulescentia. You must have been a waster ... in your ... younger days.

Amph.Amph.

Quidum? How so?

Mer.Mer.

Quia senecta aetate a me mendicas malum. Well ... here you are in your declining years begging ... me for trouble.

Amph.Amph.

Cum cruciatu tuo istaec hodie, verna, verba funditas. You shall soon suffer for this flow of language, you drudge.

Mer.Mer.

Sacrufico ego tibi. I'm sacrificing to ye, I am.

Amph.Amph.

Qui? How?

Mer.Mer.

Quia enim te macto infortunio. (slyly poising a pail of water) Why, because I'm making you an offering of a ... calamity.

At this point there is a gap in the MSS. Only a few lines have been preserved. Leo outlines the lost part as follows: After Mercury has had sufficient amusement with Amphitryon, the disturbance calls Alcmena from within. She has a dispute with her husband—Jupiter had left her earlier so that he might offer sacrifice—and shuts him out of the house. Perhaps Amphitryon went away to summon friends to aid him: at any rate, Sosia appears with Blepharo and gets a bad welcome from his master, despite Blepharo's patronage, and then escapes. Jupiter comes out of the house. Husband and lover abuse each other vigorously and a scuffle ensues. Blepharo is appealed to by Amphitryon, only to be made ridiculous by Jupiter.

Amph.Amph.

I At ego te cruce et cruciatu mactabo, mastigia. But I'll make you an offering of torture and torment, you whipping post.

Mer.Mer.

II Erus Amphitruost occupatus. The master, Amphitryon, is busy.

Mer.Mer.

III (XV LG) abiendi nunc tibi etiam occasiost. —— now you still have a chance to leave.

Mer.Mer.

IV (III) Optimo iure infringatur aula cineris in caput. It would serve you right to have a pot of ashes broken on your head.

Mer.Mer.

V (IV) Ne tu postules matulam unam tibi aquae infundi in caput You would certainly ask to have one jar of water emptied on your head.

Mer.Mer.

VI (VII) Larvatu's edepol hominem miserum medicum quaerita. Bewitched! Dear, dear! poor man! Look for a doctor.

Alc.Alc.

VII (XI) Exiuravisti te mihi dixe per iocum. You swore solemnly that you said it to me in fun.

Alc.Alc.

VIII (XII) Quaeso advenienti morbo medicari iube tu certe aut larvatus aut cerritus es. For mercy's sake have this disease treated at the outset; you surely are bewitched or crazed.

Alc.Alc.

IX (XIII) Nisi hoc ita factum est, proinde ut factum esse autumo, non causam dico quin vero insimules probri. If this did not take place just as I state, you have every right to accuse me of unchastity.

Amph.Amph.

X (XVI) Cuius? quae me absente corpus volgavit suom. Whose? A woman that prostituted herself in my absence!

Amph.Amph.

XI (V) Quid minitabas te facturum, si istas pepulissem fores? What were you threatening to do, if I pounded on that door?

Amph.Amph.

XII (VI) Ibi scrobes ecfodito tu plus sexagenos in die. There dig more than sixty ditches a day.

Amph.Amph.

XIII (XVII) Noli pessimo precari Don't intercede for an utter rascal.

Bleph.Bleph.

XIV (XVIII) animam comprime —— save your breath.

Iup.Jup.

XV (IX) Manifestum hunc optorto collo teneo furem flagiti I have him by the scruff of the neck, an outrageous thief caught in the act.

Amph.Amph.

XVI (X) Immo ego hunc, Thebani cives, qui domi uxorem meam impudicitia impedivit, teneo, thensaurum stupri No, no, Theban citizens, I have him, the monster of lust who has brought disgrace on my wife at home.

Amph.Amph.

XVII (VIII) Nilne te pudet, sceleste, populi in conspectum ingredi? Aren't you at all ashamed, you villain, to come out into public sight?

Amph.Amph.

XVIII (XIX) clandestino. —— clandestinely.

Amph. sive Iup.Amph. or Iup.

XIX (XIV) Qui nequeas nostrorum uter sit Amphitruo decernere. You who are unable to decide which of us is Amphitryon.

IV. 3. Scene 3.

Bleph.Bleph.

Vos inter vos partite; ego abeo, mihi negotium est; neque ego umquam usquam tanta mira me vidisse censeo. (disgustedly) You must untangle your own selves: I'm going: I have an engagement. (aside) Never did I see such marvels anywhere, I do believe. (turns to go)

Amph.Amph.

Blepharo, quaeso ut advocatus mi adsis neve abeas. Blepharo! Stand by me, for mercy's sake, and be my assistant: don't go!

Bleph.Bleph.

Vale. quid opust me advocato, qui utri sim advocatus nescio? Good-bye. What's the use of my being an assistant when I don't know which to be it to? [exit Blepharo.

Iup.Jup.

Intro ego hinc eo. Alcumena parturit. (aside) I'm going inside myself: Alcmena's delivery is at hand. [exit Jupiter into house, unseen by Amphitryon.

Amph.Amph.

Perii miser. 1040 quid ego faciam, quem advocati iam atque amici deserunt? numquam edepol me inultus istic ludificabit, quisquis est; nam iam ad regem recta me ducam resque ut facta est eloquar.²⁵ ego pol illum ulciscar hodie Thessalum veneficum, qui pervorse perturbavit familiae mentem meae. sed ubi illest? intro edepol abiit, credo ad uxorem meam. (wildly) Heavens! oh, Heavens! What shall I do now when assistants and friends desert me? By the Lord, that villain shall never make game of me and escape, whoever he is! I'll go straight to the king this moment and tell him all as it happened. I swear I'll have my revenge this day on that Thessalian sorcerer who has turned the wits of my household topsy-turvy. (looking around) Where is he, though? Good God! He's gone inside—to my wife, no doubt!

qui me Thebis alter vivit miserior? quid nunc agam? quem omnes mortales ignorant et ludificant ut lubet. certumst, intro rumpam in aedis: ubi quemque hominem aspexero, si ancillam seu servom sive uxorem sive adulterum 1050 seu patrem sive avom videbo, obtruncabo in aedibus. neque me Iuppiter neque di omnes id prohibebunt, si volent, quin sic faciam ut constitui. pergam in aedis nunciam. Oh, of all miserable men in Thebes! What shall I do now? Disowned and humbugged by every mortal soul to suit their humour! (pause) My mind's made up—I'll burst into the house, and every human creature there I set my eyes on, maid or man, wife or paramour, father or grandfather, I'll cut them down in my halls! And not the will of Jupiter and all the gods shall stop my doing as I've determined! I'll in this minute! (he rushes toward door: a peal of thunder: he falls to ground motionless)

ACTVS V ACT V

(Half an hour has elapsed.) enter Bromia from house, in a panic.

Brom.Brom.

Spes atque opes vitae meae iacent sepultae in pectore, neque ullast confidentia iam in corde, quin amiserim; ita mihi videntur omnia, mare terra caelum, consequi, iam ut opprimar, ut enicer. me miseram, quid agam nescio. Oh, my hopes and chances of getting out of this alive are dead and buried inside of me! There's not a thing left to keep my courage up now! The way everything—sea, land, sky—does seem set on crushing me, killing me off this instant! Oh dear, oh dear! What to do I don't know.

ita tanta mira in aedibus sunt facta. vae miserae mihi, animo malest, aquam velim. corrupta sum atque absumpta sum. caput dolet, neque audio, nec oculis prospicio satis, 1060 nec me miserior femina est neque ulla videatur magis. Such amazing things as did happen in there! Oh, poor me! I feel faint. Oh, for some water! I'm a wreck, I'm all done up. My head's splitting, and I can't hear or see right, either. There isn't a wretcheder woman on earth, or one that could seem so, either.

ita erae meae hodie contigit. nam ubi parturit, deos sibi invocat, strepitus, crepitus, sonitus, tonitrus: ut subito, ut propere, ut valide tonuit! ubi quisque institerat, concidit crepitu. ibi nescio quis maxuma voce exclamat: "Alcumena, adest auxilium, ne time: et tibi et tuis propitius caeli cultor advenit. exsurgite" inquit "qui terrore meo occidistis prae metu." The experience mistress did have this day! As soon as her time comes she calls on the gods to help her, and there's a grumbling and rumbling and smashing and crashing—what a crash, so sudden and quick and heavy it was! Every one fell flat where he stood at the peal. And then some one or other called out in a mighty voice: "Alcmena, help is at hand: be not afraid. To thee and thine the sovereign of the skies comes in kindliness. Rise," he said, "ye who have fallen in terror, from dread of me."

ut iacui, exsurgo. ardere censui aedis, ita tum confulgebant. ibi me inclamat Alcumena; iam ea res me horrore adficit, erilis praevertit metus: accurro, ut sciscam quid velit. 1070 atque illam geminos filios pueros peperisse conspicor; neque nostrum quisquam sensimus, quom peperit, neque providimus. Having dropped, I got on my feet: I thought the house was afire, the way it was all lit up then. Just then Alcmena calls for me to come. I was trembling already at what happened, but fear of mistress prevailed, and up I run to find out what she wants. And there I see she has given birth to twins, boys, and not a soul of us noticed when it happened, or is ready for it!

sed quid hoc? quis hic est senex, qui ante aedis nostras sic iacet? numnam hunc percussit Iuppiter? credo edepol, nam, pro Iuppiter, sepultust quasi sit mortuos. ibo et cognoscam, quisquis est. Amphitruo hic quidem est erus meus. Amphitruo. (sees prostrate Amphitryon) But what's this? Who's this old man lying like this in front of our house? Why, can it be he's struck by lightning? Why, mercy me, I do believe so! For, good gracious, he's as completely disposed of as if he was a corpse! I'll go find out, whoever it is. (approaches) It's Amphitryon! It's my master! (calling) Amphitryon!

Amph.Amph.

Perii. (feebly) Heaven help me!

Brom.Brom.

Surge. Get up, sir.

Amph.Amph.

Interii. I'm dead!

Brom.Brom.

Cedo manum. Give me your hand, sir. (takes it)

Amph.Amph.

Quis me tenet? Who has hold of me?

Brom.Brom.

Tua Bromia ancilla. Your servant maid, sir, Bromia.

Amph.Amph.

Totus timeo, ita me increpuit Iuppiter. nec secus est, quasi si ab Acherunte veniam. sed quid tu foras egressa es? I'm paralysed with fear! Oh, Jove, what a bolt! I feel as if I were getting back—from the next world. (he gets up) But what made you come out?

Brom.Brom.

Eadem nos formido timidas terrore impulit 1080 in aedibus, tu ubi habitas. nimia mira vidi. vae mihi, Amphitruo, ita mihi animus etiam nunc abest. We poor women were struck with the same terror in this house of yours, sir. I've seen the most amazing things! Oh deary me, master, I'm just clean dazed even now!

Amph.Amph.

Agedum expedi: scin me tuom esse erum Amphitruonem? Come, come, quick, tell me—do you know me for your master, Amphitryon?

Brom.Brom.

Scio. Surely, sir.

Amph.Amph.

Vide etiam nunc. Here, look, look again!

Brom.Brom.

Scio. (obeying) Surely, sir.

Amph.Amph.

Haec sola sanam mentem gestat meorum familiarium. (half aside) She's the only one of my household that has any sanity about her.

Brom.Brom.

Immo omnes sani sunt profecto. Oh no, sir, they're all sane, of course they are.

Amph.Amph.

At me uxor insanum facit suis foedis factis. Well, my wife had driven me insane with her infamous actions!

Brom.Brom.

At ego faciam, tu idem ut aliter praedices, Amphitruo, piam et pudicam esse tuam uxorem ut scias. de ea re signa atque argumenta paucis verbis eloquar. omnium primum: Alcumena geminos peperit filios. (warmly) Well, I'll make you change that tune, sir, your very own self, and make you realize that your wife is a pious, honest woman, sir. I'll soon give you signs and proofs of that. First of all, she has given birth to twin sons.

Amph.Amph.

Ain tu, geminos? What's that—twins?

Brom.Brom.

Geminos. Twins.

Amph.Amph.

Di me servant. The gods are with me!

Brom.Brom.

Sine me dicere, 1090 ut scias tibi tuaeque uxori decs esse omnis propitios. Let me go on, so that you may know all the gods mean well by you and your wife, sir.

Amph.Amph.

Loquere. Yes, yes.

Brom.Brom.

Postquam parturire hodie uxor occepit tua, ubi utero exorti dolores, ut solent puerperae invocat deos immortales, ut sibi auxilium ferant, manibus puris, capite operto. ibi continuo contonat sonitu maxumo; aedes primo ruere rebamur tuas. aedes totae confulgebant tuae, quasi essent aureae. After she began to feel near her time to-day and her pains were setting in, she called on the immortal gods to help her—as women do, sir, in labour—with clean washed hands and covered head. She had no sooner begun than there was a frightful thunder clap. At first we thought your house was tumbling down: your whole house was shining, sir, just as if it was gold.

Amph.Amph.

Quaeso absolvito hinc me extemplo, quando satis deluseris. quid fit deinde? For heaven's sake hurry up and don't keep me on tenterhooks! I have had enough of your trifling! What happened next?

Brom.Brom.

Dum haec aguntur, interea uxorem tuam neque gementem neque plorantem nostrum quisquam audivimus; 1100 ita profecto sine dolore peperit. While this was going on, not one of us heard your wife groan or whimper a bit, sir, the whole time: that's how she bore those boys, sir—never a pang, that's plain.

Amph.Amph.

Iam istuc gaudeo, utut erga me merita est. (heartily) Well now, I'm glad of that, no matter what her behaviour to me has been.

Brom.Brom.

Mitte ista atque haec quae dicam accipe. postquam peperit, pueros lavere iussit nos. occepimus. sed puer ille quem ego lavi, ut magnust et multum valet! neque eum quisquam colligare quivit incunabulis. Do let that be, sir, and listen. After they were born she told us to bathe them. We began. But that boy I bathed! How big and strong he was! Not a soul of us could wrap him in his swaddling clothes.

Amph.Amph.

Nimia mira memoras; si istaec vera sunt, divinitus non metuo quin meae uxori latae suppetiae sient. A most astounding story! If it be true, there's no doubt that my wife received divine aid.

Brom.Brom.

Magis iam faxo mira dices. postquam in cunas conditust, devolant angues iubati deorsum in impluvium duo maximi: continuo extollunt ambo capita. You'll call this more astounding still, sir, I warrant you. After he was tucked in his cradle, two enormous crested serpents came slipping down into the fountain basin: the next second both of them were lifting up their heads.

Amph.Amph.

Ei mihi. Heavens and earth!

Brom.Brom.

1110 Ne pave. sed angues occulis omnis cirumvisere. postquam pueros conspicati, pergunt ad cunas citi. ego cunas recessim rursum vorsum trahere et ducere, metuens pueris, mihi formidans; tantoque angues acrius persequi. postquam conspexit angues ille alter puer, citus e cunis exilit, facit recta in anguis impetum: alterum altera prehendit eos manu perniciter. Don't be scared. Well, the serpents glared around at all of us. As soon as they spied the boys they made for the cradles like a flash. I backed away, fearful for the boys and frightened for myself, pulling and hauling the cradles along after me with the serpents a-chasing us all the angrier. The minute that boy I was telling of sets eyes on the serpents he's up and out of that cradle in a trice, rushing straight for 'em and grabbing 'em one in each hand quick as a wink.

Amph.Amph.

Mira memoras, nimis formidolosum facinus praedicas; nam mihi horror membra misero percipit dictis tuis. quid fit deinde? porro loquere. Astounding! Astounding! A perfectly horrifying tale! Mercy on us! why, your very words palsy me! What then? Go on, go on!

Brom.Brom.

Puer ambo angues enicat. 1120 dum haec aguntur, voce clara exclamat uxorem tuam— The boy chokes both serpents to death. While this is going on, in a clear voice he calls out the name of your wife—

Amph.Amph.

Quis homo? Who does?

Brom.Brom.

Summus imperator divom atque hominum Iuppiter. is se dixit cum Alcumena clam consuetum cubitibus, eumque filium suom esse qui illos angues vicerit; alterum tuom esse dixit puerum. The almighty ruler of gods and men, Jupiter. He said that he himself had secretly shared Alcmena's bed and that that was his son who had crushed the serpents: the other one, he said, was your own child.

Amph.Amph.

Pol me haud paenitet, si licet boni dimidium mihi dividere cum Iove. abi domum, iube vasa pura actutum adornari mihi, ut Iovis supremi multis hostiis pacem expetam. Well, well, well! I make no complaint at being permitted to have Jove as partner in my blessings. In with you, girl! Have sacrificial vessels made ready for me instantly so that I may seek the favour of omnipotent Jove with ample offerings. [exit Bromia.

ego Teresiam coniectorem advocabo et consulam quid faciundum censeat; simul hanc rem ut facta est eloquar. 1130 sed quid hoc? quam valide tonuit. di, obsecro vostram fidem. I'll summon Tiresias the prophet and consult with him as to what he thinks should be done, and at the same time tell him all that's happened, (thunder) But what's this? That awful thunder peal! Heaven preserve us!

V. 2. Scene 2.

Jupiter appears above.

Iup.Jup.

Bono animo es, adsum auxilio, Amphitruo, tibi et tuis: nihil est quod timeas. hariolos, haruspices mitte omnes; quae futura et quae facta eloquar, multo adeo melius quam illi, quom sum Iuppiter. primum omnium Alcumenae usuram corporis cepi, et concubitu gravidam feci filio. Be of good cheer. I am here with aid, Amphitryon, for thee and thine. Thou hast naught to fear. Seers, soothsayers—have none of them. I will make known to thee future and past alike, and better far than they, moreover, for I am Jupiter. First of all, then, I took thy Alcmena to myself and by me she was made a mother.

tu gravidam item fecisti, cum in exercitum profectu's: uno partu duos peperit simul. eorum alter, nostro qui est susceptus semine, 1140 suis factis te immortali adficiet gloria. tu cum Alcumena uxore antiquam in gratiam redi: haud promeruit quam ob rem vitio vorteres; mea vi subactast facere. ego in caelum migro. By thee too was she with child when thou didst go forth to war: at one birth she bore them both. The one begotten of my seed shall win thee undying glory by his works. Live again in fond concord as of old with thy wife Alcmena: she has done naught to merit thy reproach: my power was on her. I now depart to heaven. [exit Jupiter.

V. 3. Scene 3.

Amph.Amph.

Faciam ita ut iubes et te oro, promissa ut serves tua, ibo ad uxorem intro, missum facio Teresiam senem. (reverently) Thy will shall be done: and keep thy word with me, I beg thee. (after a pause) I'll in and see my wife! No more of old Tiresias!

nunc, spectatores, Iovis summi causa clare plaudite. (to the audience) Now, spectators, for the sake of Jove almighty, give us some loud applause. [exit.