A ROMAN SCHOOL
Reading edition
90 B.C.
DRĀMATIS PERSŌNAE
Magister Servī Paedagōgus
Aulus Licinius Archiās Pūblius Licinius Crassus iūdicēs
Gāius Licinius Crassus, adulēscēns
Discipulī
Mārcus Tullius Cicerō Quīntus Tullius Cicerō Lūcius Sergius Catilīna Mārcus Antōnius Gāius Iūlius Caesar Appius Claudius Caecus Gnaeus Pompēius Pūblius Clōdius Pulcher Mārcus Iūnius Brūtus Quīntus Hortēnsius Hortalus Lūcius Licinius Lūcullus Gāius Claudius Mārcellus Mārcus Claudius Mārcellus
A ROMAN SCHOOL
When the curtain is drawn, plain wooden benches are seen arranged in order on the stage. Two boys stand at the blackboard, playing “odd or even”; two others are noisily playing nuces1; one is playing with a top, another is rolling a hoop, and a third is drawing a little toy cart. Three boys in the foreground are playing ball. They are Quintus Cicero, Marcus Cicero, and Marcus Antonius. With their conversation the scene begins.
Q. Cic. Mihi pilam dā!
M. Cic. Ō, dā locum meliōribus!
M. Ant. Tū, Mārce, pilam nōn rēctē remittis. Oportet altius iacere.
M. Cic. Iam satis alta erit. Hanc excipe!
(Tosses the ball very high.)
M. Mar. (going up to L. Lucullus who has the cart). Mihi plōstellum dā.
L. Luc. Nōn, hōc plōstellum est meum. Sī tū plōstellum cupis, domum reversus inde pete.
M. Mar.
(The Magister enters and loudly calls the roll, those present answering adsum.)
Mag.
Mārcus Tullius Cicerō. Quīntus Tullius Cicerō. Lūcius Sergius Catilīna.
(Catilina is absent and all shout abest.)
Mārcus Antōnius. Gāius Claudius Mārcellus. Gāius Iūlius Caesar. Appius Claudius Caecus.
(Appius is absent and all again shout abest.)
Lūcius Licinius Lūcullus. Gnaeus Pompēius. Pūblius Clōdius Pulcher. Mārcus Iūnius Brūtus. Quīntus Hortēnsius Hortalus. Mārcus Claudius Mārcellus.
Nunc, puerī, percipite, quaesō, dīligenter, quae dīcam, et ea penitus animīs vestrīs mentibusque mandāte. Sine morā respondēte. (Writes on the board the sentence “Omnīs rēs dī regunt.”) Nōmen dī, Mārce Cicerō, dēscrībe.
M. Cic. Dī est nōmen, est dēclīnātiōnis secundae, generis masculīnī, numerī plūrālis, cāsūs nōminātīvī, ex rēgulā prīmā, quae dīcit: Nōmen quod subiectum verbī est, in cāsū nōminātīvō pōnitur.
Mag. Bene, Mārce, bene! Ōlim eris tū māgnus vir, eris cōnsul, eris ōrātor clārissimus, quod tam dīligēns es. Quīnte Cicerō! (Enter Catilina late. He is accompanied by a paedagogus carrying a bag with tabellae.) Ō puer piger, homō perditissimus eris. Quō usque tandem abūtēre, Catilīna, patientiā nostrā?
L. Cat. Ō magister, mihi parce, frūgī erō, frūgī erō.
Mag. Catilīna, mōre et exemplō populī Rōmānī, (Enter two servi, one of whom takes Catilina by the head, the other by the feet, while the magister pretends to flog him severely, and then resumes the lesson.2) Pergite, puerī. Quīnte Cicerō, verbum regunt dēscrībe.
Q. Cic. (hesitatingly). Regunt est verbum. Est coniugātiōnis secundae, coniugātiōnis secundae, coniugātiōnis se . . .
Mag. Male, Quīnte. Tū es minus dīligēns frātre tuō Mārcō. Nescīs quantum mē hūius negōtī taedeat. Sī pēnsum crās nōn cōnfēceris, est mihi in animō ad tuum patrem scrībere. Haec nīl iocor. Tuam nēquitiam nōn diūtius feram, nōn patiar, nōn sinam.
Q. Cic. Ō dī immortālēs, tālem āvertite cāsum et servāte piōs puerōs, quamquam pigrī sunt.
Mag. Quīnte Hortēnsī, verbum regunt dēscrībe.
Q. Hor. Regunt est verbum; praesēns est regō; īnfīnītīvus, regere; perfectum, rēxī; supīnum, rēctum. Est coniugātiōnis tertiae, generis actīvī, modī indicātīvī.
Mag. Rēctē, rēctē, Quīnte! Bonus puer es. Gnaeī Pompēī, perge.
Gn. Pom. (crying). Nōn pergere possum.
Mag. Ō puer parve, pergere potes. Hanc placentam accipe. Iam perge.
Gn. Pom. (taking the little cake and eating it). Regunt temporis praesentis est; persōnae tertiae; numerī plūrālis nōmen sequēns, ex rēgulā secundā, quae dīcit: Verbum persōnam numerumque nōminis sequitur.
Mag. Rēctē! Nōnne tibi dīxī tē rem expōnere posse? Nihil agis, Gnaeī Pompēī, nihil mōlīris, nihil cōgitās, quod nōn ego nōn modo audiam, sed etiam videam plānēque sentiam. Gāī Mārcelle, tempus futūrum flecte.
G. Mar. Regam, regēs, reget, regēmus, regētis, regent.
Mag. Quae pars ōrātiōnis est omnīs, Gāī?
G. Mar. Omnīs est adiectīvum.
Mag. Rēctē; estne omnīs dēclīnābile an indēclīnābile, Pūblī Pulcher?
P. Pul. Omnīs est dēclīnābile, omnis, omne.
Mag. In quō cāsū est omnīs, Mārce Brūte?
M. Bru. Omnīs est cāsūs accūsātīvī ex rēgulā quae dīcit: Nōmen adiectīvum cāsum et genus nōminis substantīvī sequitur.
Mag. Cūius dēclīnātiōnis est omnīs, Mārce Mārcelle?
M. Mar. Omnīs est dēclīnātiōnis tertiae.
Mag. Potesne omnīs dēclīnāre?
M. Mar. Oppidō, magister, auscultā. (Declines omnis.)
Mag. Mārcus Claudius, suō mōre, optimē fēcit. Quam cōnstrūctiōnem habet rēs, Mārce Brūte?
M. Bru. Rēs est nōmen cāsūs accūsātīvī, quod obiectum verbī regunt est. (Enter Appius Caecus late. His paedagogus accompanies him.)
Paed. Magister, Appius Claudius hodiē māne aeger est, idcircō tardē venit. (Exit.)
Mag. Poenās dā, “Micā, Micā,” recitā.
App. Caec.
Micā, micā, parva stella, Mīror quaenam sīs, tam bella! Splendēns ēminus in illō Alba velut gemma caelō.
Quandō fervēns Sōl discessit, Nec calōre prāta pāscit, Mox ostendis lūmen pūrum Micāns, micāns per obscūrum.
Mag. Quis alius recitāre potest?
All (shouting). Ego possum, ego possum.
Mag. Bene; Mārce Antōnī, recitā.
M. Ant.
Trēs philosophī dē Tusculō Mare nāvigārunt vāsculō; Sī vās fuisset tūtius Tibi canerem diūtius.
Others (shouting). Mihi recitāre liceat.
Mag. Recitā, Gnaeī Pompēī.
Gn. Pom.
Iōannēs, Iōannēs, tībīcine nātus, Fūgit perniciter porcum fūrātus. Sed porcus vorātus, Iōannēs dēlātus, Et plōrāns per viās it fūr, flagellātus.
M. Bru. (holding up his hand). Novum carmen ego possum recitāre.
Mag. Et tū, Brūte! Perge!
M. Bru.
Gāius cum Gāiā in montem Veniunt ad hauriendum fontem; Gāius prōlāpsus frēgit frontem, Trāxit sēcum Gāiam īnsontem.3
Mag. Hōc satis est hodiē. Nunc, puerī, cor— Quid tibi vīs, Quīnte Hortēnsī? Facis ut tōtō corpore contremīscam.
Q. Hor. (who has been shaking his hand persistently). Magister, ego novōs versūs prōnūntiāre possum. Soror mea eōs mē docuit.
Mag. Recitā celeriter.
Q. Hor.
Iacōbulus Horner Sedēbat in corner Edēns Sāturnālicium pie; Īnseruit thumb, Extrāxit plum, Clāmāns, Quam ācer puer sum I.
Mag. Nunc, puerī, corpora exercēte. Ūnum, duo, tria.
(The discipuli now perform gymnastic exercises, following the example of the magister, who goes through the movements with them. These may be made very amusing, especially if the following movements are used: Arms sideways—stretch; heels—raise, knee bend; forehead—firm; right knee upward—bend.)
Mag. Cōnsīdite. Pēnsum crāstinum est pēnsum decimum. Cavēte nē hōc oblīvīscāminī. Pēnsum crāstinum est pēnsum decimum. Et porrō hunc versum discite: “Superanda omnis fortūna ferendō est.” (The magister repeats this verse emphatically several times in a loud and formal tone, the discipuli repeating it after him at the top of their voices.) Iam geōgraphia nōbīs cōnsīderanda est et Galliae opera danda. Quid dē Galliā potes tū dīcere, Mārce Mārcelle?
M. Mar. Gallia est omnis dīvīsa in partēs trēs, quārum ūnam incolunt Belgae, aliam Aquītānī, tertiam quī ipsōrum linguā Celtae, nostrā Gallī appellantur.
Mag. Pūblī Pulcher, hōrum omnium, quī fortissimī sunt?
P. Pul. Hōrum omnium fortissimī sunt Belgae.
Mag. Mihi dīc cūr Belgae fortissimī sint.
P. Pul. Belgae fortissimī sunt proptereā quod ā cultū atque hūmānitāte Rōmae longissimē absunt, minimēque ad eōs mercātōrēs Rōmānī saepe commeant atque ea quae ad effēminandōs animōs pertinent, important.
Mag. Quis fīnēs Galliae dēsīgnāre potest?
All (raising hands). Ego, ego possum.
Mag. Lūcī Lūculle, Galliae fīnēs dēsīgnā.
L. Luc. Gallia initium capit ā flūmine Rhodanō; continētur Garumnā flūmine, Ōceanō, fīnibus Belgārum; attingit flūmen Rhēnum ab Sēquanīs et Helvētiīs; vergit ad septentriōnēs.
Mag. Quōs deōs colunt Gallī, Gnaeī Pompēī?
Gn. Pom. Deōrum maximē Mercurium colunt; hunc omnium inventōrem artium ferunt, hunc viārum atque itinerum ducem esse arbitrantur. Post hunc Apollinem et Martem et Iovem et Minervam colunt.
Mag. Bene, Gnaeī. Quem deum, Catilīna, colunt Rōmānī maximē?
L. Cat. Nōs Iovem dīvum patrem atque hominum rēgem maximē colimus.
Mag. Nunc, puerī, cantāte. Quod carmen hodiē cantēmus? (Many hands are raised.) Gāī Caesar, quod carmen tū cantāre vīs?
G. Caes. Volō “Mīlitēs Chrīstiānī” cantāre.
Mag. Hōc pulcherrimum carmen cantēmus. (A knock is heard. Enter Publius Licinius Crassus and Aulus Licinius Archias with slaves carrying scrolls.) Salvēte, amīcī. Vōs advēnisse gaudeō. Nōnne adsīdētis ut puerōs cantāre audiātis?
A. Archias. Iam rēctē, carmen sānē audiāmus.
Mag. Optimē, puerī, cantēmus. Ūnum, duo, tria.
(All rise and sing; each has the song4 before him on a scroll.)
Mīlitēs Chrīstiānī, Bellō pergite; Cāram Iēsū crucem Vōs prōvehite. Chrīstus rēx, magister, Dūcit āgmina, Eius iam vēxillum It in proelia.
Māgnum āgmen movet Deī ecclēsia. Gradimur sānctōrum, Frātrēs, sēmitā. Nōn dīvīsī sumus, Ūnus omnēs nōs; Ūnus spē, doctrīnā, Cāritāte nōs.
Thronī atque rēgna Īnstābilia, Sed per Iēsum cōnstāns Stat ecclēsia. Portae nōn gehennae Illam vincere, Nec prōmissus Iēsū Potest fallere.
Popule, beātīs Vōs coniungite! Carmina triumphī Ūnā canite; Chrīstō rēgī honor, Laudēs, glōria, Angelī hōc canent Saecla omnia.
Mag. Iam, puerī, silentiō factō, Gāius Iūlius Caesar nōbīs suam ōrātiōnem habēbit quam dē ambitiōne suā composuit. Hāc ōrātiōne fīnītā, Mārcus Tullius Cicerō suam habēbit. Ut prōnūntiātum est complūribus diēbus ante, hī duo puerī dē praemiō inter sē contendunt. Hōc diē fēlīcissimō duo clārissimī et honestissimī virī arbitrī sunt, Aulus Licinius Archiās et Pūblius Licinius Crassus. In rōstra, Gāī Iūlī Caesar, ēscende!
G. Caes. (Reads from a scroll or recites.) Mea cāra ambitiō est perītus dux mīlitum fierī. Bella multa et māgna cum gentibus omnibus nātiōnibusque orbis terrae gerere cupiō.
Bellum īnferre volō Germānīs et īnsulae Britanniae omnibusque populīs Galliae et cēterīs quī inimīcō animō in populum Rōmānum sunt. In prīmīs, in īnsulam Britanniam pervenīre cupiō, quae omnis ferē Rōmānīs est incōgnita, et cōgnoscere quanta sit māgnitūdō īnsulae.
Volō pontem in Rhēnō aedificāre et māgnum exercitum trādūcere ut metum illīs Germānīs quibus nostra parvula corpora contemptuī sunt iniciam. Ubi Rhēnum ego trānsierō, nōn diūtius glōriābuntur illī Germānī māgnitūdine suōrum corporum.
Vōs sententiam rogō, iūdicēs amplissimī, nōnne est haec ambitiō honesta?
Deinde rēs gestās meās perscrībam. Negōtium hūius historiae legendae puerīs dabō mentium exercendārum causā, nam mihi crēdite, commentāriī dē bellō Gallicō ūtilēs erunt ad ingenia acuenda puerōrum. (Discipuli applaud.)
Mag. Nunc Mārcus nōbīs dē suā cārissimā ambitiōne loquētur. In rōstra ēscende, Mārce!
M. Cic. Quoad longissimē potest mēns mea respicere et ultimam memoriam recordārī, haec mea ambitiō fuit, ut mē ad scrībendī studium cōnferam, prīmum Rōmae, deinde in aliīs urbibus.
Ambitiō mea autem est omnibus antecellere ingenī meī glōriā, ut haec ōrātiō et facultās, quantacumque in mē sit, numquam amīcōrum perīculīs dēsit. Nōnne est haec ambitiō maximum incitāmentum labōrum?
Deinde, haec est mea ambitiō, ut cōnsul sim. Dē meō amōre glōriae vōbīs cōnfitēbor. Volō poētās reperīre quī ad glōriam meī cōnsulātūs celebrandam omne ingenium cōnferant. Nihil mē mūtum poterit dēlectāre, nihil tacitum. Quid enim, nōnne dēsīderant omnēs glōriam et fāmam? Quam multōs scrīptōrēs rērum suāram māgnus ille Alexander sēcum habuisse dīcitur! Itaque, ea verba quae prō meā cōnsuētūdine breviter simpliciterque dīxī, arbitrī, cōnfīdō probāta esse omnibus. (Discipuli applaud.)
Mag. Ut vidētis, arbitrī clārissimī, puerī ānxiīs animīs vestrum dēcrētum exspectant. Quae cum ita sint, petō ā vōbīs, ut testimōnium laudis dētis.
A. Archias. Ambōs puerōs, magister, maximē laudamus, sed ūnus sōlus praemium habēre potest. Nōs nōn dēcernere possumus. Itaque dēcrēvimus ut hī puerī ambō inter sē sortiantur uter praemium obtineat. Servī, urnam prōferte! Nōmina in urnam iaciam. Quī habet nōmen quod prīmum ēdūcam, is vīctor erit. (Takes from the urn a small chip and reads the name Marcus Tullius Cicero.) Tē, Mārce Cicerō, victōrem esse prōnūntiō. Sīc fāta dēcrēvērunt. Servī, corōnam ferte! (Places a wreath of leaves on the head of Marcus. The discipuli again applaud.)
M. Cic. (going up to Cæsar). Caesar, nōlī animō frangī. Nōn dubium est quīn tū meliōrem ōrātiōnem habuerīs.
G. Caes. (coolly). Dīs aliter vīsum est.
Mag. Vōs ambō, Gāī et Mārce, honōrī huic scholae estis. Utinam cēterī vōs imitentur. Aliud certāmen hūius modī mox habēbimus. Loquēmur dē— (A knock is heard. Enter Gaius Licinius Crassus.)
G. Cras. Mī pater!
P. Cras. Mī fīlī! (They embrace.)
G. Cras. Māter mea mihi dīxit tē arbitrum in hōc certāmine hodiē esse. Tē diūtius exspectāre nōn potuī. Iam diū tē vidēre cupiō et ego quoque cupiō hōc certāmen audīre. Estne cōnfectum?
P. Cras. Cōnfectum est. Utinam hī puerī tē recitāre audiant! Tū eōs docēre possīs quōmodo discipulī Rhodiī in scholā recitent.
M. Cic. Ō arbiter, nōbīs grātissimum sit, sī tuum fīlium audīre possīmus.
Discipuli (eagerly). Ō Crasse, recitā, recitā!
G. Cras. Sī vōbīs id placet, recitābō, meum tamen carmen longum est. Ēius titulus est “Pome of a Possum.” (Recites with gesticulation.)
The nox was lit by lūx of lūna, And ’twas a nox most opportūna To catch a possum or a coona; For nix was scattered o’er this mundus, A shallow nix, et nōn profundus. On sīc a nox, with canis ūnus, Two boys went out to hunt for coonus.
Ūnus canis, duo puer, Numquam braver, numquam truer, Quam hoc trio quisquam fuit, If there was, I never knew it.
The corpus of this bonus canis Was full as long as octō span is, But brevior legs had canis never Quam had hīc bonus dog et clever. Some used to say, in stultum iocum, Quod a field was too small locum For sīc a dog to make a turnus Circum self from stem to sternus.
This bonus dog had one bad habit, Amābat much to chase a rabbit; Amābat plūs to catch a rattus, Amābat bene tree a cattus. But on this nixy moonlight night This old canis did just right, Numquam chased a starving rattus, Numquam treed a wretched cattus, But cucurrit on, intentus On the track and on the scentus, Till he treed a possum strongum In a hollow trunkum longum. Loud he barked in horrid bellum, Seemed on terrā vēnit hellum. Quickly ran uterque puer Mors of possum to secure. Cum venērunt, one began To chop away like quisque man; Soon the ax went through the trunkum, Soon he hit it all kerchunkum; Combat deepens; on, ye braves! Canis, puerī, et staves; As his powers nōn longius tarry, Possum potest nōn pūgnāre; On the nix his corpus lieth, Ad the Styx his spirit flieth, Joyful puerī, canis bonus Think him dead as any stonus. Now they seek their pater’s domō, Feeling proud as any homō, Knowing, certē, they will blossom Into heroes, when with possum They arrive, narrābunt story, Plēnus blood et plēnior glory. Pompey, David, Samson, Caesar, Cyrus, Black Hawk, Shalmaneser! Tell me where est now the glōria, Where the honors of vīctōria?
Cum ad domum nārrant story, Plēnus sanguine, tragic, gory, Pater praiseth, likewise māter, Wonders greatly younger frāter. Possum leave they on the mundus, Go themselves to sleep profundus, Somniant possums slain in battle Strong as ursae, large as cattle.
When nox gives way to lūx of morning, Albam terram much adorning, Up they jump to see the varmen Of which this here is the carmen. Possum, lo, est resurrēctum! Ecce puerum dēiectum! Nōn relinquit track behind him, Et the puerī never find him; Cruel possum, bēstia vilest, How tū puerōs beguilest; Puerī think nōn plūs of Cæsar, Go ad Orcum, Shalmaneser, Take your laurels, cum the honor, Since istud possum is a goner!5
(Discipuli applaud.)
Mag. Omnēs quī Gāiō Crassō grātiās agere velint, surgite! (All stand.) Nunc, puerī, domum redīte.
Discipuli (departing).
Omne bene, Sine poenā Tempus est lūdendī; Vēnit hōra Absque morā Librōs dēpōnendī.
Valē, magister. Valē, magister.