Part 2 — CHAPTER VII. Of Epistolary Composition.

Next to social communications by means of visits and conversation, are communications by means of letters and billets. It is not only absence, but a multiplicity of business, and a great number of relations which give a very great extension to this part of our social interests.

Our readers have too much judgment to think that we wish to give them lessons in style, or teach them how they should write letters of friendship, of congratulation, of condolence, of apology, of recommendations, of invitation, of complaint, or of censure. This enumeration alone, shows the impossibility of it. Some general reflections upon propriety in epistolary composition, and strict details of the forms and ceremonial parts of letters, will compose this important chapter.

SECTION I. Of Propriety in Letter Writing.

If in conversation we ought to attend to propriety of language, its choice and graceful euphony, how much more is it necessary to endeavor to make our style in writing clear, precise, elegant, and appropriate to all subjects. Vivacity of discourse forces us frequently to sacrifice happy though tardy expressions to the necessity of avoiding hesitancy; but what is thus an obstacle in speaking, does not interfere with the use of the pen. We ought, therefore, to avoid repetitions, erasing, insertions, omissions, and confusion of ideas or labored construction. If we write a familiar letter to an equal or a friend, these blemishes may remain; but otherwise, we must commence our letter again.

The most exact observance of the rules of language is strictly necessary; a fault of orthography, or an incorrect expression, are not allowable, even in the least careful letter or the most unimportant billet. Even correction is not admissible; for, besides being a blemish to the letter, it betrays the ignorance or inattention of him who writes it. For these reasons, it is well to make a rough draft, if we are little accustomed to epistolary style, and if being very young, we cannot perfectly remember the rules of syntax, and the dictionary. Some persons, it is true, censure this precaution, which, say they, marks the style with affectation and stiffness. This censure does not seem to me well-founded. The loss of time which this method requires, is a more real inconvenience; and for this reason, and on account of the embarrassment with which we may be troubled, it is well to accustom ourselves to writing a letter extempore with neatness, elegance and correctness.

The choice of materials for writing, without being very essential, is yet necessary; to write on very coarse paper, is allowable only to the most indigent; to use gilt edged and perfumed paper for letters of business, would be ridiculous. The selection of paper ought always to be in keeping with the person, the age, the sex, and the circumstances of the correspondents. Ornamented paper, of which we have just spoken; paper bordered with colored vignettes and embossed with ornaments in relief upon the edges; and paper slightly colored with delicate shades, are designed for young ladies, and those whose condition, taste, and dignity, presuppose habits of luxury and elegance. Many distinguished people, however, reasonably prefer simplicity in this thing, and make use of very beautiful paper, but yet without ornament.

People of business, heads of companies or establishments, and persons of distinction, with many titles, use paper printed at the top, that is to say, having the name of their residence, the three first figures of the date of the year, their address, and these words, Mr. ——, (here follow the titles) to Mr. ——.

It is extremely impolite to write a letter upon a single leaf of paper, even if it is a billet; it should be always double, even though we write only two or three lines. It is still more vulgar to use for an envelope, paper on which there are one or two words foreign to the letter itself, whether they be written or printed.

Billets, letters folded lengthwise, and half-envelopes, are little used. A folded letter, especially if written upon vellum paper, should be pressed at the folds by means of a paper-folder.

The rules of politeness ought moreover to decide as to the expense of postage. They require us to defray the expense of the letter if it is written to distinguished persons, or to those of whom we ask any favor; but it would be an incivility, and sometimes a want of delicacy, to do it when we write to a friend, an acquaintance, or to persons of little fortune, whose feelings we should fear to wound. We must therefore, in order to save them the expense as well as to avoid dissatisfaction, endeavor to make some excuse of business.

Letters for new year’s day, and other holidays, are usually written beforehand, in order to arrive on the previous or very same day. This is particularly required towards relations; for friends and intimate acquaintances, the following week will do, and for other persons, any time within the month.

It is as indispensable to answer when you are written to, as when you are spoken to, and the indolence which so many correspondents allow in themselves, in this respect, is an incivility. And if after all they decide to answer, they begin by apologies so constantly renewed, that they become common-place. We must use much care that these excuses may not be ridiculous. Conciseness, and some new terms of expression, are, in this case, indispensable. The same observation is applicable in making use of reproving terms.

Letters supply the place of visits, as we have seen, in bestowing presents, or on occasions of marriages, funerals, &c.

Two persons should not write in the same letter, by one writing upon the first, and another upon the second leaf, except we are intimate with the correspondent. The same is applicable to postscripts. It is not allowable, except to familiar friends, to use expressions borrowed from foreign languages, as for instance the phrase of the Italians, I kiss your hands, &c. The language of men who write to ladies ought always to have a polish of respect, with which the latter might dispense in answering. Except on occasions of great ceremony, a lady ought not to address to a man such phrases as, I have the honor to be, &c. while the latter should use the most respectful terms, as Deign, madam, to allow me; allow me the honor of presenting you my respects, &c.

You may use a lofty style towards persons to whom you owe respect; on easy, trifling, or even jesting style, towards a friend; and a courteous style towards ladies generally. You should not write in a trifling style to persons of a higher standing. It sometimes happens that a man of superior rank honors with his friendship a man of lower condition, and is pleased that the latter writes to him without ceremony. In this case we may use the privilege which is given us; but we must take care not to abuse it, and to make known from time to time that we are ready to confine ourselves within respectful bounds.

When you write upon any subject, consider it fully before putting it upon paper, and treat of each topic in order, that you may not be obliged to recur to any one again, after having spoken of another thing.

If you have many subjects to treat of in the same letter, commence with the most important; for if the person to whom you write is interrupted while reading it, he will be the more impatient to resume the reading, however little interesting he may find it.

It is useful and convenient to begin a new paragraph at every change of the subject.

After having written Sir or Madam at the top of the letter, we should not commence with one of these phrases; Sir, madam —, your sister, has written me, that. We should say, I understand by a letter which madam —, your sister, has written me.

Take care also, when writing to a person worthy of respect, not to make compliments to any one. But write to this third person whatever you wish him to know.

Titles of respect, as Lordship, Majesty, Highness, Excellency, Honor, Madam, &c. ought never to be abbreviated, either in writing to the persons themselves, or to any one who has acquaintance with them.

Figures are used only for sums and dates; numbers of men, days, weeks, &c. are to be written at length.

SECTION II. Of the Interior and Exterior Form of Letters.

The interior form of a letter comprehends the titles and qualities of persons to whom it is proper to give them; the more or less courteous phrases which we use; the more or less respectful manner with which the commencement and body of the letter are to be arranged; and the more or less humble terms which we are to use for the signature, the address or the superscription.

The exterior form of a letter is what concerns the size of the paper; the blank that we should leave between the vedette, (or line containing only the name) and the first line; between the last line, the appellation, and signature; the manner of folding the letter, and the choice and mode of putting on the seal.

In addressing the pope, we say at the top of the letter, Holy Father, or Most Holy Father; and instead of You, we should say, Your Holiness; to a prince cardinal, My Lord, and Your Most Eminent Highness.

To a cardinal, My Lord, and Your Eminence.

To an archbishop or bishop, My Lord, and Your Grace.

To an emperor or empress, we say, Sire, or Madam; and instead of You, we say, Your Imperial Majesty.

To a king we also say, Sire, and Your Majesty.

To a queen, Madam, and Your Majesty.

To the brother of a king, Your Royal Highness.

To an elector of the empire, Your Electoral Highness.

To a sovereign prince, Your Most Serene Highness.

To a prince, Your Highness.

To an ambassador or minister, Your Excellency.

To the chancellor of France, My Lord, and Your Lordship.

The title Excellency is not given to ladies.

Persons who have an exact knowledge of the language and usage of the court, know what is the most proper manner of expressing themselves. We will give some examples in which the different degrees of respect may be readily perceived.

‘I have received the letter with which you have been pleased to honor me.’

‘I have received the letter which you have done me the favor to write to me, which you have done me the honor to write to me, which you have taken the trouble to write to me.’

There are some persons who commence their letters with these words; I have received yours; this is a fault; we should say, your letter. The first is the style of those people who, being pressed with business, are obliged to make abbreviations; and we must, in the common customs of life, beware of imitating them in this respect. We may say the same in respect to persons who write at the top of their letters, ‘I have received your honored letter of such a date;’ or, ‘in answer to your honored letter;’ or, ‘I write you these few words.’ All these forms are objectionable.

We should never repeat in the first sentence of a letter, the names My Lord, Sir, or Madam, with which we began. But if we write to a prince, or even to a minister, we should after the first line use the words, Your Majesty, Your Highness, or Your Excellency, and repeat them from time to time, in the course of the letter, if it is of some length.

As to the conclusion of a letter, we should not say simply, I am, without adding some such phrase as these; With the most profound respect; with profound respect, with the highest regard, &c. To persons who have the title of majesty, highness, eminence, &c. we say, I am your majesty’s, or your highness’s, &c. very humble, &c.

The words esteem and affection are used only in letters to friends or acquaintance, because they are too familiar; but when accompanied by any words which relieve them, they do not offend one. As for example, we can say, I am with profound respect, and the highest esteem, &c.

The following forms may be used with elegance;

Accept, Sir, the assurances of high consideration; be pleased to accept the assurances, &c.

Letters of petition or request should be in folio, that is to say, upon a sheet of paper in its full size; the margin should be half the breadth of the page; the spaces and blanks which we ought to leave between the upper edge of the paper and the vedette,¹⁶ and between the vedette and the first line, are very different, according to the degree of inferiority or superiority. The greater these spaces are, the more respect do they indicate. The first line ought always to begin below the middle of the page, when we write to a person to whom we owe much respect; but the second page should begin one line below the vedette. A blank space should always be left between the last words of the signature, and the lower edge of the paper. If there should not be sufficient room, it would be better to carry one or two lines over to the succeeding page, than to fail in this respect.

For a familiar letter, it has become fashionable to leave no margin at all. It is, however, in these letters only that margins can be useful, namely, in receiving a vertical line when all the paper is filled.

The date of a letter may be put at the beginning when we write to an equal; but in writing to a superior, it should be at the end, in order that the title at the head of the letter may be entirely alone. In letters of business, on the contrary, it is necessary to date at the top and on the first line, that persons may know conveniently, the chronological order of their communications.

The date is often necessary to the understanding of many passages of your letter, or to explain the sense of one which your correspondent may have received at the same time from another person.

In a simple billet, we put the date of the day, Monday, &c. It is well sometimes to add the hour.

Every letter to a superior ought to be folded in an envelope. It shows a want of respect to seal with a wafer; we must use sealing-wax. Men usually select red; but young ladies use gilt, rose, and other colors. Both use black wax when they are in mourning. Except in this last case, the color is immaterial, but not the size, for very large ones are in bad taste. The smaller and more glossy, the better ton they are. Although sealing-wax is preferable, still we must sometimes avoid using it; it is when we are afraid that the seal may be opened.

When the letter is closed with or without an envelope, we put only a single seal upon it; but if the letter is large, we use two. Moreover, if it contains important papers, it should have three seals or more, according to the nature of the envelope. If a person takes charge of a letter as a favor, it would be very impolite to put more than one seal upon it. If the letter should be folded in such a manner that by partly opening it at the end, its contents may be read, it would be equally impolite to put a little wax upon the edges. We can use this precaution only when the letter is sent by the post or by a domestic.

When we use no envelope, and the third page of the letter is all written upon, we should leave a small blank space where the seal is to be put; without this precaution, many very important words will be covered.

We should not seal a letter of respect with an antique device. It is more polite to use our coat of arms or cipher.

Persons of taste, who have no coat of arms, adopt a seal bearing some ingenious device, in keeping with their profession, sentiments, &c.

A letter which is to be shown, as a letter of introduction or recommendation, ought never to be sealed, since the bearer ought necessarily to know the contents. But to seal it without having first allowed the bearer to read it, would be very impolite. You should prove to the person recommended, that you have spared no pains to render him a service.

It is only conscripts, and peasants, who fold a letter like an apothecary’s packet, who omit to press the wafer with a seal, or secure it by pricking it in every part with the point of a pin.

We never seal petitions which are to be presented to the king, and to the members of the royal family.

Some distinguished persons are flattered in writing to them, by our omitting to designate precisely their address. It is an error; we should indicate with exactness the town, and the province, state, &c. if there is more than one town of the same name. In a large city, it is well to write the name of the street and number, and the quarter of the city where the street is. People of business, abbreviate this by putting N and the number, or the number alone; this practice is more expeditious than polite.

We generally address a letter to one person only; but in certain cases we may address to two or more collectively.

It is well to add to the name, the title or profession, in order to prevent mistake. However, if circumstances have obliged any one of your acquaintance to act in an inferior situation, it would be a want of delicacy to join to his name that of his business.

When we write to the king, we put simply in the address, To the King. To foreign kings we say, To his Catholic Majesty, his Britannic Majesty, &c.

To persons who have the title of highness, we say, To his Highness, and then their quality or rank. To ministers and ambassadors, we say, To his Excellency, the Minister, or Ambassador. If a person has many titles, we select the highest, and omit the others.

In billets, we put the date at the top of the paper, and begin the letter about two inches below. The word Sir is put in the first line. We conclude with one of these phrases, I am, Sir, yours; I am entirely yours, &c. We do not write a billet to ladies, or to superiors, as this was introduced only to avoid ceremony.

The most familiar billets are written in the third person, contrary to the common practice. They contain very little, and begin thus, Mr. or Madam N present their respects, or compliments, to Mr. Such-a-one, and request, &c. After having made the request, we end with, and he will oblige his humble servant.

In this kind of billets, it is best not to use the pronoun he or she, for independently of the incivility, it might result in confusion. Sometimes it would be difficult to know whether the pronoun referred to the person who received the letter, or to the one who wrote it.

I shall conclude this chapter by an observation relative to friendly and familiar letters; not that I have the folly to pretend to regulate by any ceremonial, the sentiments of the heart; but there is in reality nothing more cold and ridiculous, than accumulations of epithets like these, Your tender, sincere and constant friend, &c.