ARCADIA

I’ve stayed in many a boarding-house, From good, to fair, to rotten, Seeking the comfort of a home With all its cares forgotten. In pubs I’ve dwelt and drowned the cares Which canker life by meeting With open hand each casual friend, And moistened well each greeting. I’ve dwelt in many a town and shire, From Cairns to Wangaratta; I’ve dropped into the Brisbane show And Bundaberg Regatta. But now I’ve struck an ideal spot, Where pleasure never cloys. Just list’ to the advantages This choice retreat enjoys— The rent is free, no board to pay, No land or income taxes, And on my tail no middleman Nor fat man fatter waxes. If I should say I need some clothes, Someone will just “take action”; No tailors’ bills can worry me And drive me to distraction. And should my health appear to fail And appetite grow fine, My doctor hands me—not a bill, But just a Number 9.[21] The scenery is glorious, The sunsets are cyclonic; The atmosphere’s so full of iron, It acts as quite a tonic. And even parsons preach the Word, Nor take up a collection; While politicians don’t exist, Nor e’en a by-election. No scandal ever hovers here To sear our simple lives; And married men are always true To absent, loving wives. But the crowning gift of all is—no- One’s happiness is marred, Finding answers to the questions On that d——d War Census Card. And should you doubt if there can be A spot which so excels, Let me whisper—it is Anzac! Anzac by the Dardanelles. Bombardier H. E. Shell, 7th Battery, Aust. F.A.