← Table of contents
Harper's Young People, February 21, 1882

MAX RANDER'S YOUNG NOBLEMEN.

Reading edition

BY MATTHEW WHITE, JUN.

It was only a day or so after my bicycle ride that I received a letter from father, telling me that he and mother were detained in London, and asking if Thad and I could do without them for a week longer.

So in view of our "to-be-continued" lonely condition, the landlady kindly offered to introduce us to "three young gentlemen" who were attending school in the town, and who boarded with her sister.

They all came of noble families, she informed me, adding that it would be a great honor for me to know them.

Thus my expectations were raised to the highest pitch, and the morning of the day they were to call I spent in polishing my watch chain to its brightest, and deciding whether a blue or a red bow would be most appropriate to wear.

I know now that I must have seen scores of little dukes and lords walking about the streets of London just like other boys, but I didn't know it then, and always had an idea that they all wore red velvet cloaks and cream-colored tights, carried swords dangling at their sides, and never went out except in a gilded chariot, preceded by two men on horseback blowing brass horns to clear the way.

Therefore I was considerably astonished when I saw three boys of about my own age turn in at the gate, all dressed in short black coats and tall black hats, exactly like any common English school-boy.

"Now, Thad," I said, as I turned away from the window, "be sure and make a low bow when you are introduced, because—" But the Landlady's knock was on the door, and in she came, followed in close order by Malcolm Heppingham, the son of a Duke, Douglas Galton, whose father was an Earl, and Ralph Maisley, who was an "Honorable."

I was presented to these high and mighty individuals with great ceremony, and then the landlady went out and left us to ourselves.

For a moment there was dead silence, while Thad stood staring at our visitors as if afraid to sit down in their presence. The three English chaps stared at us too, and then all at once began to ask questions about America.

And such questions! Why, they made me think of it as some island away off in the Arctic Ocean, which people never heard from except every two or three years, when a ship managed to break its way through the ice, and carried back the news that a new barn had been built or half the inhabitants killed off by the natives.

Nevertheless, I was deeply impressed by the grand airs the young noblemen gave themselves, and the queer way they had of pronouncing their words.

Their call was a very formal one, for they only staid about ten minutes, and then filed out in solemn procession, after making me promise to come and see them the very next afternoon. Nothing was said about Thad, so I concluded they thought him too young for company.

Well, of course I felt very much honored by the pressing invitation to visit them so soon, and promptly at the hour named presented myself at their boarding-house, where I was immediately pounced upon by all three of my titled friends, who in a very lively manner, and all talking at once, informed me that I had arrived just in the nick of time to see the "jolliest sight"—no less than the ascent of the dining-room chimney by a boy sweep.

Then they took me into the long dining-hall, with its great fire-place, which, though big enough to hold two boys, was anything but a pleasant spot to poke one's head into.

The sweep quickly and quietly made his preparations, and with our four pair of eyes riveted upon his sooty form, speedily clambered out of sight.

"I say," cried Duke Malcolm, when there was nothing more to be seen, "while he's up there, come on out and take a look at my dog-kennel."

"And my rabbit-burrows," put in the Earl.

"And you must see my pony too, you know," added the Honorable Ralph.

This last inducement was not to be resisted, so I hurried out into the back yard after my hosts, wondering why the chaps with the biggest titles should have only dogs and rabbits to show, while the fellow who was merely an Honorable rejoiced in the possession of a pony.

The kennel and burrows were duly inspected and admired, and we were crossing the yard to visit the stables, when the Earl suddenly stopped, struck one hand against his forehead, and with the other pointed to the chimney over the dining-room, out of which smoke was ascending.

"The sweep!" cried the Duke, staggering back against the barn door, which banged to with a crash.

"He'll be roasted alive! Quick!" exclaimed the Honorable, and then they all three started on a run for the house.

I followed as fast as I could, but not knowing the ins and outs of the yard as well, I completely lost sight of them before I reached the back door. However, I remembered where the dining-room was, and dashing in, found nobody there but the maid, who was blowing the already fiercely crackling fire into a brighter blaze.

Not stopping to wonder why the others were not there, I rushed up to her, and snatched the bellows out of her hands so suddenly that she immediately set up a cry of "Murder!" while I began to shout "Fire!" at the top of my voice, expecting every instant to see the charred body of the sweep come tumbling out of the chimney at my feet.

Before I could explain to the girl the awfulness of the deed she had done, the landlady, the butler, the rest of the servants, and all the lady boarders had crowded into the room, and as the maid was too frightened to say anything except that one word, they all began to stare at me as if I were a burglar.

But all my thoughts were with that poor sweep roasting alive in the chimney, and rushing up to the landlady, I entreated her to have the fire put out, and— But at that moment I saw looking in at the window the faces of my three noble friends, all distorted with suppressed laughter, while directly behind them stood the sweep himself, grinning from ear to ear.

"I say, Rander," called out the Duke, "why don't you cable to New York for one of your American fire-engines?"

"Perhaps we can induce the Queen to present you with a leather medal in honor of your mighty efforts at life-saving," added the Earl.

Then all three vaulted into the room to explain how they had caught a glimpse of the sweep walking off just as they reached the house, and forgetting me entirely, had run after him to see if he was scorched.

However, I consoled myself with the reflection that not one of those chaps with handles to their names can ever be King of England, while I have the chance of becoming President of the United States.

THE GAME OF TCHUNGKEE.

Illustration from Harper's Young People, February 21, 1882 An Illustrated Weekly
Explore with AITake your curiosity a little further.

Reading settings