THE FABLES OF BARLANDUS, &c.

Fab. CCII. A Lyon and a Frog.

A Lyon that was Ranging about for his Prey, made a Stop all on a Sudden at a Hideous Yelling Noise he heard, which not a little Startled him. The Surprize put him at first into a Shaking Fit; but as he was looking about, and Preparing for the Encounter of some Terrible Monster, what should he see but a Pitiful Frog come Crawling out from the Side of a Pond. And is This All? (says the Lyon) and so betwixt Shame and Indignation, he put forth his Paw, and Pash’d out the Guts on’t.

The Moral.

There’s no Resisting of First Motions; but upon Second Thoughts we come immediately to our selves again.

REFLEXION.

The Surprize of the Lyon is to teach us, that no Man living can be so Present to Himself, as not to be put beside his Ordinary Temper upon some Accidents or Occasions; but then his Philosophy brings him to a Right Understanding of Things, and his Resolution carries him through All Difficulties. It is Another Emphatical Branch of This Emblem, that as the Lyon himself was not Thorough-Proof against This Fantastical Alarum; so it was but a Poor Wretched Frog all this while, that Discompos’d him, to shew the Vain Opinion and False Images of Things, and how apt we are to be Transported with Those Fooleries, which, if we did but Understand, we should Despise. Wherefore ’tis the Part of a Brave, and a Wise Man to Weigh, and Examine Matters without Delivering up himself to the Illusion of Idle Fears, and Panick Terrors. It was in truth, below the Dignity of a Lyon to Kill the Poor Creature, but This, however may be said in Plea for’t, that he was asham’d to leave behind him a Witness of his Weakness.

Fab. CCIII. An Ant and a Pigeon.

An Ant dropt, Unluckily into the Water as she was Drinking at the Side of a Brook. A Wood-Pigeon took Pity of her, and threw her a little Bough to lay hold on. The Ant sav’d her self by that Bough, and in That very Instant, spies a Fellow with a Birding-Piece, making a Shoot at the Pigeon. Upon This Discovery, she presently runs up to him and Stings him. The Fowler starts, and breaks his Aim, and away flies the Pigeon.

The Moral.

All Creatures have a Sense of Good Offices, and Providence it self takes Care, where Other Means fail, that they may not Pass Unrewarded.

REFLEXION.

The Practice of Requiting Good Offices is a Great Encouragement to the Doing of them; and in truth, without Gratitude there would be Little Good Nature; for there is not One Good Man in the World that has not need of Another. This Fable of the Ant is not All together a Fiction, for we have many Instances of the Force of Kindness; even upon Animals and Insects: To pass over the Tradition of Androclus’s Lyon, the Gratitude of Elephants, Dogs and Horses is too Notorious to be Deny’d. Are not Hawks brought to the Hand, and to the Lure? And in like manner, are not Lyons, Tygres, Bears, Wolves, Foxes, and other Beasts of Prey Reclaim’d by Good Usage? Nay, I have seen a Tame Spider, and ’tis a Common Thing to have a Lizzard come to Hand. Man only is the Creature, that to his Shame no Benefits can Oblige, no, nor Secure, even from seeking the Ruine of his Benefactor: So that This Pismire sets us a Lesson here in her Thankfulness to her Preserver.

Fab. CCIV. A Peacock and a Pye.

In the Days of Old, the Birds liv’d at Random in a Lawless State of Anarchy; but in time they began to be Weary on’t, and Mov’d for the Setting up of a King. The Peacock Valu’d himself upon his Gay Feathers, and put in for the Office: The Pretenders were heard, the Question Debated; and the Choice fell upon the Poll to King Peacock: The Vote was no sooner pass’d, but up stands a Pye with a Speech in his Mouth to This Effect: May it please your Majesty, says he, We should be glad to Know, in Case the Eagle should fall upon us in your Reign; as she has formerly done, how will you be able to Defend us?

The Moral.

In the Bus’ness of either Erecting, or Changing a Government, it ought to be very well Consider’d before-hand, what may be the Consequences, in case of such a Form, or such a Person.

REFLEXION.

Kings are not to be Chosen for the Beauty or the Gracefulness of their Persons, but for the Reputation they have in the World, and the Endowments of their Minds. This Fable shews likewise the Necessity of Civil Order, and the Danger of Popular Elections, where a Factious Majority commonly Governs the Choice. Take the Plurality of the World, and they are neither Wise, nor Good; and if they be left to Themselves, they will Undoubtedly Chuse such as They Themselves Are. ’Tis the Misery of Elective Governments, that there will be Eternally Corruption and Partiality in the Choice; for there’s a Kind of a Tacit Covenant in the Case, that the King of their Own making shall make his Makers Princes too: So that they Work for Themselves all this while, not for the Publique: But the Pye’s Question stopt all their Mouths, and it was wisely let fall too without a Reply, to Intimate that it was Unanswerable.

Fab. CCV. An Impertinent Dr. and his Patient.

A Physician was told One Morning that a Certain Patient of his was Dead, why then the Lord’s Will be Done, says he: We are All Mortal; but if This Man would have Forborn Wines, and Us’d Clysters, I’d have Warranted his Life This Bout for God-a-Mercy. Well, says one, but why did you not rather give him This Advice when it might have done him Good, then stand Talking of it to no manner of Purpose Now the Man is Dead?

The Moral.

’Tis to no Purpose to think of Recalling Yesterday; and when the Steed is Stoll’n, of Shutting the Stable Door.

REFLEXION.

This Fable Recommends to us the Doing of Every thing in its Due Season, for either too Soon or too Late signifies Nothing. It is but making Almanacks for the Last Year, to stand Talking what Might have been done; when the Time of Doing it is past. When a Battle is Lost, This or That, we say, might have Prevented it. When a Tumult is Emprov’d into a Rebellion, and a Government Overturn’d by’t, ’tis just to as much purpose to say, This or That might have Sav’d All: As for our Doctor, here to say, when his Patient was Dead, that it was for want of going such or such a way to Work. We have abundance of These Wise Men in the World that are still looking backward without seeing One Inch of the way before them. Not but that the Experience of Things Past, may be very Instructive to us toward the Making of a Right Judgment upon Things to come, but in such a Case as This, it is wholly Vain and Unprofitable, to all manner of Intents. ’Tis the Bus’ness of a Substantial, and a Well-Grounded Wisdom, to be still looking forward, from the First Indispositions, into the Growth, and Progress of the Disease. It Traces the Advance of Dangers step by step, and shews us the Rise and Gradations of the Evil; and gives us Light, either toward the Preventing, or the Suppressing of it. We have in such an Instance as This, the means before us, of a True, and an Useful Perception of Things, whereas Judgments that are made on the Wrong side of the Danger, amount to no more then an Affectation of Skill, without either Credit or Effect. Let Things be done when they May be done, and When, and As they Ought to be done: As for the Doctor’s Iffing upon the Bus’ness, when his Patient was Dead, it was just to as much purpose as Blowing Wind in’s Breech.

Fab. CCVI. A Lyon, Ass and Fox.

There was a Hunting-Match agreed upon betwixt a Lyon, an Ass, and a Fox, and they were to go Equal Shares in the Booty. They ran down a Brave Stag, and the Ass was to Divide the Prey; which he did very Honestly and Innocently in to Three Equal Parts, and left the Lyon to take his Choice: Who never minded the Dividend; but in a Rage Worry’d the Ass, and then bad the Fox Divide; who had the Wit to make Only One Share of the Whole, saving a Miserable Pittance that he Reserv’d for Himself. The Lyon highly approv’d of his Way of Distribution; but Prithee Reynard, says he, who taught thee to Carve? Why truly says the Fox, I had an Ass to my Master; and it was His Folly made me Wise.

The Moral.

There must be no Shares in Sovereignty. Court-Conscience is Policy. The Folly of One Man makes Another Man Wise; as One Man Grows Rich upon the Ruines of Another.

REFLEXION.

This Fable is sufficiently Moraliz’d Elsewhere; but it gives us further to Understand, that Experience is the Mistress of Knaves as well as of Fools. Here was the Innocence of the Ass, and the Craft of the Fox, Both in One. He sav’d his Skin by the Modesty of the Division, and left enough for himself too, over and above! For Asses are No great Venison Eaters.

Fab. CCVII. A Wolfe and a Kid.

As a Wolfe was passing by a Poor Country Cottage, a Kid spy’d him through a Peeping-Hole in the Door; and sent a Hundred Curses along with him. Sirrah (says the Wolfe) If I had ye out of your Castle, I’d make ye give Better Language.

The Moral.

A Coward in his Castle, makes a Great Deal more Bluster then a Man of Honour.

REFLEXION.

The Advantages of Time and Place are enough to make a Poultron Valiant. There’s Nothing so Couragious as a Coward, if you put him out of Danger. This way of Brawl and Clamour, is so Arrant a Mark of a Dastardly Wretch, that he does as good as Call himself so that Uses it. The Kid behind the Door has the Priviledge of a Lord Mayors Fool. He’s under Protection: The One is Scurrilous, and the Other Sawcy; and yet These are the Two Qualities that pass but too frequently in the World for Wit and Valour.

Fab. CCVIII. An Ass to Jupiter.

A Certain Ass that serv’d a Gard’ner, and did a great deal of Work for a very little Meat, fell to his Prayers for Another Master. Jupiter Granted his Request, and turn’d him over to a Potter, where he found Clay and Tile so much a Heavier Burden then Roots and Cabbage, that he went to Prayers once again for Another Change. His next Master was a Tanner; and there, over and above the Encrease of his Work, the very Trade went against his Stomach: For (says he) I have been only Pinch’d in my Flesh, and Well Rib-Roasted sometimes under my Former Masters; but I’m In now for Skin and All.

The Moral.

A Man that is ever Shifting and Changing, is not, in truth, so Weary of his Condition, as of Himself; And he that still Carries about him the Plague of a Restless Mind, can never be pleas’d.

REFLEXION.

’Tis a High Point of Prudence for any Man to be Content with his Lot. For ’tis Forty to One that he that Changes his Condition, out of a Present Impatience and Dissatisfaction, when he has try’d a New one, Wishes for his Old One again: and Briefly, the more we shift, the Worse Commonly we are. This Arises from the Inconstancy of our Minds, and One Prayer does but make way for Another. Those People, in fine, that are Destin’d to Drudgery, may well Change their Masters, but never their Condition.

He that finds himself in any Distress, either of Carcass, or of Fortune, should do well to Deliberate upon the Matter, before he Prayes for, or Resolves upon a Change. As for Example now, what is it that Troubles me? Is there any Help for’t or no? What do I want? Is it Matter of Necessity or Superfluity? Where am I to look for’t? How shall I come at it? &c.

Now All our Grievances are either of Body or of Mind, or (in Complication) of Both, and either the Remedy is in our Own Power, or it is not. There are some Things that we cannot do for our selves, without the Help of Others: There are some Things again, that Other People Cannot do for Us, nor are they any way else to be done but by Our selves. In the One Case we are to seek abroad for Relief, and in the Other, Whoever Consults his Reason, and his Duty, will find a Certain Cure at Home: So that it goes a Great way in the Philosophy of Humane Life, to Understand the Just Measures of what we are Able to do, and what we are Oblidg’d to do, in Distinction from the Contrary; for Otherwise we shall spend our Days with Æsop’s Ass, in Hunting after Happiness where it is not to be found, without ever looking for’t where it is. ’Tis allow’d us, to be sensible of Broken Limbs, and Diseased Bodies: And Common Prudence sends us to Surgeons and Physicians, to Piece, and Patch them up again. But in These Cases, we Examine the Why, the What, and the How of Things, and Propose Means Accommodate to the End. ’Tis Natural to be Mov’d with Pain, and as Natural to Seek Relief; And it is well done at Last, to do That which Nature bids us do; But for Imaginary Evils, Every Man may be his Own Doctor. They are Bred in our Affections, and we may Ease our selves. If the Question had been a Spavin, or a Gall’d Back, and the Ass had Petition’d to Jupiter for Another Farryer, it might have been a very Reasonable Request. Now if he had but Pitch’d upon such or such a Particular Master, it might have done well enough too: But to grow Weary of One Master, or of One Condition, and then to be presently Wishing in General Terms for Another: This is only an Inconsiderate Ejaculation thrown off at Random, without either Aim or Reason. Upon the Whole Matter, it is but laying our own Faults at the Door of Nature and Providence, while we Impute the Infirmities of our Minds to the Hardship of our Lot.

To proceed according to the Distribution of my Matter; it is much with Us in This Case, as it was with the Man that fell from his Horse and could not get up again. He was sure he was Hurt, he said, but could not tell Where. That is to say, first our Grievances are Fantastical where they are not Corporal. 2ly. It is Another Error in us, that in All our Fantastical Disappointments, we have Recourse to Fantastical Remedies. 3ly. Providence has Allotted Every Man a Competency for his State and Business. All beyond it is Superfluous, and there will be Grumbling without End, if we come to reckon upon’t, that we want This or That, because we Have it Not, instead of Acknowledging that we have This or That, and that we want Nothing. These Things duly Weigh’d, what can be more Providential then the Blessing of having an Antidote within our selves against all the Strokes of Fortune! That is to say, in the Worst of Extremeties, we have yet the Comfort left us of Constancy, Patience, and Resignation.

’Tis not for a Wise and an Honest Man, to stand Expostulating with the Nature of Things. As for Instance, Why should not I be This or That, or be so or so, as well as He or T’other? But I should rather say to my self after This manner: Am not I the Creature of an Almighty Power; and is it not the same Power and Wisdom that Made and Order’d the World, that has assign’d me this Place, Rank or Station, in’t? This Body, This Soul, This every Thing? What I am, I must be, and there’s no Contending with Invincible Necessity; No Disputing with an Incomprehensible Wisdom: To say Nothing of the Impiety of Appealing from an Inexplicable Goodness. If I can Mend my Condition by any Warrantable Industry and Virtue, the Way is Fair and Open; And That’s a Priviledge that Every Reasonable Creature has in his Commission: But without Fixing upon some Certain Scope, and Prescribing Just and Honourable Ways to’t, there’s Nothing to be done. ’Tis a Wicked Thing to Repine; and ’tis as Bootless, and Uneasy too; for One Restless Thought, Begets, and Punishes Another. We are not so Miserable in our Own Wants, as in what Others Enjoy: And then our Levity is as Great a Plague to us as our Envy, so that we need Nothing more then we have, but Thankfulness, and Submission, to make us Happy. It was not the Ground of the Asses Complaint, that it was Worse with Him then with Other Asses; but because he was an Ass: And he was not so Sick of his Master, as of his Work. His Fortune was well enough for such an Animal, so long as he kept himself within his Proper Sphere and Bus’ness: But if the Stones in the Wall will be taking upon them to Reproche the Builder; and if Nothing will please People unless they be Greater than Nature ever Intended them; What can they Expect, but the Asses Round of Vexatious Changes, and Experiments; and at last, when they have made Themselves Weary and Ridiculous, e’en glad to set up their Rest upon the very Spot where they Started.

Fab. CCIX. A Woman and her Maids.

It was the Way of a Good Housewifely Old Woman, to call up her Maids every Morning just at the Cock-Crowing. The Wenches were loth to Rise so soon, and so they laid their Heads together, and Kill’d the Poor Cock: for, say they, if it were not for his Waking our Dame, she would not Wake us: But when the Good Woman’s Clock was gone, she’d Mistake the Hour many times, and call ’em up at Midnight: So that instead of Mending the Matter, they found themselves in a Worse Condition Now then Before.

The Moral.

One Error makes way for another. First, we Complain of small things: Then we Shift, and instead of Mending the Matter, we find it Worse, till it comes at last to the Tinker’s Work of Stopping One Hole, and Making Ten.

REFLEXION.

’Tis a Common Thing for People that are Uneasy, to fly to Remedies that are Worse then the Disease; wherefore Men should Deliberate before they Resolve; and say to Themselves, This we suffer at Present, and This or That we Propose to Get by such and such a Change; and so set the One against the Other. The Wenches were call’d up too Early, they thought, and so for fear of having too Little Sleep, they ran the Risque of having no Sleep at all. And it fares much at the same Rate in Publique Grievances that it does in Private; When rather then bear the Importunity of a Flea-biting, we are apt to run our selves Hand over Head into a Bed of Scorpions; which is such another kind of an Expedient, as if a Body should Beat out his Brains to Cure the Head-Ach. Flesh and Bloud is Naturally impatient of Restraint; beside the Itch and Curiosity that we have, to be Prying and Searching into Forbidden Secrets; and to see (as one says) What Good is in Evil. ’Tis Natural to us to be Weary of what we have, and still to be Hankering after something or other that we have Not: And so our Levity Pushes us on from One Vain Desire to Another, in a Regular Vicissitude, and Succession of Cravings and Satiety. We want (as I say) what we have not, and grow Sick on’t when we have it. Now the Wise Man Clears the Whole Matter to us, in Pronouncing All things under the Sun (That is to say, the Pomp, the Pleasures, and the Enjoyments of This World) to be Vanity of Vanities, and All, Vanity. The Truth of it is, we Govern our Lives by Fancy, rather then by Judgment. We Mistake the Reasons of Things, and Impute the Issue of them to Wrong Causes. So that the Lesson given us here, is Preceptive to us, not to do any thing but upon due Consideration. The Wenches Kill’d the Cock for calling them up so soon, whereas the Crowing of the Cock was the Cause, in Truth, that they were call’d up no sooner.

Fab. CCX. A Lyon and a Goat.

A Lyon spy’d a Goat upon the Crag of a High Rock, and so call’d out to him after this Manner: Hadst not thou better come Down now, says the Lyon, into This Delicate Fine Meadow? Well, says the Goat, and so perhaps I would, if it were not for the Lyon that’s there Before me: But I’m for a Life of Safety, rather then for a Life of Pleasure. Your Pretence is the Filling of My Belly with Good Grass; but your Bus’ness is the Cramming of your Own Guts with Good Goats-Flesh: So that ’tis for your Own Sake, not Mine, that you’d have me come down.

The Moral.

There’s no Trusting to the Formal Civilities and Invitations of an Enemy, and his Reasonings are but Snares when he pretends to Advise us for our Good.

REFLEXION.

He that Advises another to his Own Advantage, may be very Reasonably Suspected to give Councel for his Own Ends. It may so fall Out, ’tis True, as to be Profitable for Both: But all Circumstances would be Well Examin’d in such a Case before we Trust. This is the Song of your Men of Prey, as well as of your Beasts of Prey, when they Set up for the Good of the Goats and Common People. How many Fine Things have we had told as in the Memory of Man, upon the Subject of our Liberties, Properties, and Religion, and the Delivering us from the Fears and Jealousies of Idolatry, and Arbitrary Power! And what was the Fruit of All This in the End, but Vision and Romance on the Promising Hand, and an Exchange of Imaginary Chains, for Real Locks and Bolts, on the Other: But Æsop’s Beasts saw further into a Mill-Stone then our Mobile: And that the Lyon’s Invitation of the Goat from the Rocks into the Fool’s Paradise of a Delicate Sweet Meadow, signify’d no more, in Plain English, then Come down that I may Eat ye.

Fab. CCXI. A Vultur’s Invitation.

The Vultur took up a Fit of a very Good Humour once, and Invited the Whole Nation of Birds to make Merry with him, upon the Anniversary of his Birth-Day. The Company came; The Vultur shuts the Doors upon them, and Devours his Guests instead of Treating them.

The Moral.

There’s no Meddling with any Man that has neither Faith, Honour, nor Good Nature in him.

REFLEXION.

’Tis Dangerous Trusting to specious Pretexts of Civility and Kindness, where People are not well assur’d of the Faith and Good Nature of Those they have to do withal; In which case, the Butchery, and the Breach of Hospitality Represented in This Fable, under a Masque of Friendship, was no more, then what might Reasonably enough be Expected under such Circumstances. There are Men of Prey as well as Beasts and Birds of Prey, and for Those that Live upon, and Delight in Bloud, there’s no Trusting of them: For let them pretend what they will, they Govern themselves, and take their Measures according to their Interests and Appetites. ’Tis a Hard Case yet, for Men to be forc’d upon Ill Nature, in their Own Defence, and to suspect the Good Faith of Those, that gives us All the Protestations and Assurance of Friendship, and Fair Dealing that One Man can give Another. Nay the very Suspicion is an Affront, and almost sufficient to Authorize some sort of Revenge. He that Violates the Necessary Trust and Confidence that One Man ought to Repose in Another, does what in Him lies, to Dissolve the very Bond of Humane Society; for there’s no Treachery so Close, so Sure, and so Pernicious, as That which Works under a Veil of Kindness. We set Toyls, Nets, Gins, Snares, and Traps for Beasts and Birds ’tis True; and we Bait Hooks for fishes; But All This is done in their Own Haunts, and Walks, and without any Seal of Faith and Confidence in the Matter: But to break the Laws of Hospitality and Tenderness; To betray our Guests under our Own Roofs, and to Murder them at our Own Tables; This is a Practice only for Men and Vulturs to be guilty of.

Fab. CCXII. Bustards and Cranes.

Some Sports-men that were abroad upon Game, spy’d a Company of Bustards and Cranes a Feeding together, and so made in upon ’em as fast as their Horses could carry them. The Cranes that were Light, took Wing immediately, and sav’d themselves, but the Bustards were Taken; for they were Fat, and Heavy, and could not Shift so well as the Other.

The Moral.

Light of Body and Light of Purse, comes much to a Case in Troublesome Times; Only the One saves himself by his Activity, and the Other scapes because he is not worth the Taking.

REFLEXION.

Camerarius makes This to be an Emblem of the Taking of a Town, where the Poor scape better then the Rich; for the One is let go, and the Other is Plunder’d and Coop’d up. But with Favour of the Moralists, it was not at the Fowler’s Choice, which to Take, and which to Let go; for the Cranes were too Nimble, and got away in spite of him: So that This Phansie seems rather to Point at the Advantages that some have over Others, to make Better shift in the World then their Fellows, by a Felicity of Make, and Constitution, whether of Body or of Mind: Provided always, that they Play Fair, and Manage all Those Faculties with a Strict Regard to Common Honesty and Justice.

Fab. CCXIII. Jupiter and an Ape.

Jupiter took a Fancy once to Summon all the Birds and Beasts under the Canopy of Heaven to appear before him with their Brats, and their Little ones, to see which of ’em had the prettiest Children: And who but the Ape to put her self Foremost, with a Brace of her Cubs in her Arms, for the Greatest Beauties in the Company.

Fab. CCXIV. An Eagle and an Owl.

A Certain Eagle that had a mind to be well serv’d, took up a Resolution of Preferring Those that she found most agreeable, for Person and Address; and so there past an Order of Council for All Her Majesty’s Subjects to bring their Children to Court. They came accordingly, and Every One in their Turn was for Advancing their Own: Till at last the Owl fell a Mopping, and Twinkling, and told Her Majesty, that if a Gracious Meen and Countenance might Entitle any of her Subjects to a Preference, she doubted not but her Brood would be look’d upon in the First Place; for they were as like the Mother, as if they had been spit out of their Mouth. Upon this the Board fell all into a Fit of Laughing, and call’d Another Cause.

The Moral of the Two Fables above.

No Body ever saw an Ill-favour’d Fool in the World yet, Man, or Woman, that had not a Good Opinion of its Own Wit and Beauty.

REFLEXION.

Self Love is the Root of All the Vanities that are struck at in These Two Fables, and it is so Natural an Infirmity, that it makes us Partial even to Those that come of us, as well as our selves: And then it is so Nicely Divided, betwixt Piety, Pride, and Weakness, that in Many Cases ’tis a hard Matter to Distinguish the One from the Other. ’Tis a Frailty for a Man to Think Better of his Children then they Deserve: But then there is an Impulse of Tenderness, and of Duty, that goes along with it, and there must be some sort of an Esteem in the Case too, for the setting of That In-bred Affection at Work. The Difficulty lies in the Moderating of the Matter, and in getting the True Medium betwixt being Wanting to our Own Flesh and Bloud, once Remov’d, and Assuming too much to our selves. Let the Attachment be what it will, we must not suffer our Judgments to be either Perverted, Blinded, or Corrupted, by any Partiality of Prepossessions whatsoever.

The Moral here before us, Extends to the Fruits and Productions of the Brain, as well as of the Body; and to Deformities in the Matter, as well of Understanding, as of Shape. We are Taught here Principally, Two Things; First, how Ridiculous it is for a Man to Dote upon Fops and Buffons, though never so much the Issue of his Own Head and Loins; And yet Secondly, How Prone we are to Indulge our Own Errors, Follies, and Miscarriages, in Thought, Word, and Deed. The World has Abundance of these Apes and Owls in’t: So that Whoever does but look about him, will find so many Living Illustrations of This Emblem, that more Words upon the Subject would be needless.