THE FABLES OF ABSTEMIUS, &c.

Fab. CCLIII. Demades the Orator.

This Demades was a very Famous Orator, and taking Notice as he was in the Middle of a Discourse to the People upon a Subject of Great Importance, that their Thoughts were Wand’ring upon Something else, he slipt from his Text into This Digression. Ceres (says he) a Swallow and an Eele, were Travelling together upon the Way: They came to a River, it seems, and the Swallow flew over it; The Eele made a shift to Swim through it;——And there he stopt. Well (says some of the Company) and what became of Ceres? Why (says Demades) The Goddess was mightily Offended, to find so many People in the World that are Deaf to any thing they may be the Better for, and yet have their Ears Open to Fooleries.

The Moral.

People are sooner Reclaim’d by the Side-Wind of a Surprize, then by Downright Admonition and Councel; for they’ll lend an Ear to a Parable when Nothing else will Down with them.

REFLEXION.

Men Mind the Pleasure, and the Satisfaction of a Fancy, or a Loose Appetite more then they do Better Things; and they are sooner brought to Themselves, and set Right by the Innuendo of a Parable, then by the Dint of direct Reason. There are many Men that are Infinitely Tender in Point of Honour, and have very little Regard yet upon the Main, to Truth and Equity. Now such People as These are sooner Wrought upon by Shame then by Conscience, when they find themselves Fool’d and Shamm’d (as we say) into a Conviction. This Fable tells us what we Ought to do in the Case of Attending to Instructive and Profitable Counsels. It tells us also what we are apt to do, in Heark’ning after Fooleries: and loosing the Opportunity of Hearing and Learning Better Things. And it shews us in fine, the Force of an Allegory betwixt Jest and Earnest; which in such a Case as This, is certainly the most Artificial, Civil, and Effectual Manner of Reproche. I call it a Reproche, for ’tis an Affront to Good Manners as well as to Ordinary Prudence, not to Hearken to a Man of Authority; That is to say, to the Voice of Wisdom, when she speaks to us out of the Mouth of a Philosopher. Men that have Wandring Thoughts at such a Lecture, deserve as well to be Whipt, as Boys for Playing at Push-Pin, when they should be Learning their Lesson: Beside, that it is only Another way of calling a Man Fool, when no Heed is given to what he says. Now Demades that Understood both his Bus’ness, and the Weak side of Humane Nature perfectly Well, never troubled his Head to bring his Auditory to their Wits again by the Force of Dry and Sober Reason; but Circumvented them by a Delicate Figure, into a Curiosity that led them Naturally to a Better Sense of their Interest, and their Duty.

Fab. CCLIV. A Fox and a Hedge-Hog.

Æsop brought the Samians to their Wits again out of a most Desperate Sedition with This Fable.

A Fox, upon the Crossing of a River, was forc’d away by the Current into an Eddy, and there he lay with Whole Swarms of Flies Sucking and Galling of him. There was a Water-Hedge-Hog (we must imagin) at hand, that in Pure Pity Offer’d to Beat away the Flies from him. No, No, says the Fox, Pray let ’em Alone, for the Flies that are upon me now are e’en Bursting-full already, and can do me little more Hurt then they have done: But when These are gone once, there will be a Company you shall see of Starv’d Hungry Wretches to take their Places, that will not leave so much as One Drop of Bloud in the Whole Body of me.

Tiberius Cæsar made a very Pertinent Application of This Fancy to a Case of his Own. The Question was, Whether or no he should Casheir some of his Corrupt Governors of Provinces, for Oppressing the People? He gave the World to Understand his Mind by this Fable.

There was a Man lay Miserably Wounded upon the High-way, and Swarms of Flies upon him, Sucking his Sores. A Traveller that was passing by, Pity’d his Condition, and Offer’d him his Service, in Pure Charity to Drive them away. No, No, says T’other, pray let them alone; for when These are gone, I shall have Worse in Their Places. This will be the Case of My Subjects if I Change their Governors.

The Moral.

The Force of a Fable.

REFLEXION.

If (says Æsop) You shall once Destroy your Present Governor, that is Full and Wealthy, you must of Necessity Chuse Others when he is gone, who will be sure to Fill their own Coffers out of what the Other has left ye. This Fable upon the Whole, is very Instructive how People should Behave themselves in the Case of Male-Administration, or Oppression; where there is any Colour or Complaint of Cruelty, or Injustice, under the Cover of Sovereign Power. The Fox’s Resolution here is mightily to the Purpose: That is to say, where the Grievance is only the Unrighteous Exercise of a Lawful Authority. The Removal of Bloud Suckers that are already as Full as their Skins will hold, serves only to make way for Others that are Greedy and Empty. This is no Redress of the Evil, No, nor so much as a Change; but in Truth, an Augmentation of it.

It is again to be Consider’d, that as Government is Necessary, Sacred, and Unaccountable, so it is but Equal for us to bear the Infelicities of a Male Exercise of it, as we Enjoy the Blessings of Authority and Publique Order. There’s Nothing Pure that’s Sublunary, but somewhat still of Good Blended with the Bad, and of Bad with the Good; And This Natural Mixture runs through the Whole Course and Condition of Humane Affairs. We are not to be either our Own Carvers, or our Own Chusers, and the Man puts out his Own Eyes that does not see the Folly, and the Iniquity of Struggling with Insuperable Powers, which is Impious in the Practice, and Miserable in the Conclusion. Where Government is Accounted as Bondage, the Exercise of it shall never fail of being call’d Persecution and Oppression: But to put Matters at Worst, Let us for Argument sake, suppose Pilling and Polling Officers, as Busie upon the People as These Flies were upon the Fox: Better bear a Tolerable Present Calamity then Exchange it for a Worse; and the Fox had the Wit rather to suffer the Galling of a Parcel of Flies that were full already, then by Beating them off, to make way for a New set of Hungry Sharpers that would do him Fifty times the Mischief.

Fab. CCLV. A Mouse in a Chest.

A Mouse that was bred in a Chest, and had liv’d all her days there upon what the Dame of the House laid up in’t, happen’d one time to drop out over the Side, and to Stumble upon a very Delicious Morsel, as she was Hunting up and down to find her way In again. She had no sooner the Taste of it in her Mouth, but she brake out into Exclamations, what a Fool she had been thus Long, to Perswade her self that there was No Happiness in the World but in That Box.

The Moral.

A Contented Mind and a Good Conscience will make a Body Happy where-ever he is.

REFLEXION.

’Tis well to be Content in what Place or Condition soever we are; without being yet so Fond of it as not to be prepar’d for any Change or Chance that may Befal us. A Good Patriot loves his Own Country Best, but yet in case of Necessity, or a Fair Convenience, the Whole Globe of the Earth is an Honest Man’s Country, and he reckons himself at home wherever he is. The Mouse was Well in the Chest; but she found her self Better afterwards in the World, which serves to tell us that we may be Happy in a Private Life, as well as in a Publique, and that by the Benefit either of a Christian, or a Philosophical Resignation to our Lot, whatever it is, we may be so wherever we are.

Fab. CCLVI. A Husbandman and Ceres.

A Certain Farmer complain’d that the Beards of his Corn Cut the Reapers and the Thrashers Fingers sometimes, and therefore he desired Ceres that his Corn might grow hereafter without Beards. The Request was Granted, and the Little Birds Eat up all his Grain. Fool that I was (says he) rather to lose the Support of my Life, then venture the Pricking of my Servants Fingers.

The Moral.

There must be no Refining upon the Works of Providence; for He that thinks to Mend them, Forfeits his Right to the Blessing and Benefit of them.

REFLEXION.

No Man can be perfectly Happy; but if he be either Curious, or Unsteady, he shall Live and Die Craving, and in a Restless Want of something or other that is never to be had. Wherefore we should do well to Weigh our Present Inconveniences against Those that may probably arise in the Future, and not so much as to think of Changing our Condition till we have Ballanc’d the Accounts. We may lay down This, in short, for a Rule without any Exception, that Nothing but a Fool or a Madman will Wish any thing to be Other then as God has Made it. Let us Reform our Lives, and Mend our Manners, and set Every thing Right at Home first, before we take upon us to Correct the Works of Providence and Nature. The Husbandman thought Corn would do better without Beards, till he found that according to the Way he went to Work, he should have neither One nor T’other.

Fab. CCLVII. A Country-Man and a Hawk.

A Country Fellow had the Fortune to take a Hawk in the Hot Pursuit of a Pigeon. The Hawk Pleaded for her self, that she never did the Country-Man any Harm, and therefore I hope, says she, that You’ll do Me None. Well, says the Country-Man, and pray what Wrong did the Pigeon ever do you? Now by the Reason of your own Argument, you must e’en Expect to be Treated Your self, as You your self would have Treated This Pigeon.

The Moral.

’Tis good to Think before we speak, for fear of Condemning our selves out of our Own Mouths.

REFLEXION.

This Fable holds forth to us several Morals. Rapine and Injustice, Meet in the End with Violence. One Murderer is Kill’d by Another. Adulterers are paid in kind; and One Wicked Man Punishes Another. It is but according to the Course of the World, for the Stronger to Oppress the Weaker, and for Thieves Themselves to Rob one Another: But the more Mighty do well however in Avenging Those that are Oppress’d by the Less Mighty. And the Fable has This Prospect too, that Princes are as much Ty’d to Vindicate their Subjects Cause as if it were their Own.

’Tis no News for the Weak and the Poor to be a Prey to the Strong, and the Rich, and the Vindication of the Innocent is no Ill Plea, or Masque for the Oppressing of the Guilty. Birds of Prey are an Emblem of Rapacious Officers. A Superior Power takes away by Violence from Them, That which by Violence they took away from Others: But it falls out too often, that the Equity of Restitution is forgotten, after the Execution of the Punishment. Now what is This way of Proceeding, but Drinking the Blood of the Widow and the Orphan at second hand? for He that takes away from a Thief, That which the Thief, to his Knowledge, took from an Honest Man, and keeps it to Himself, is the Wickeder Thief of the Two, by how much the Rapine is made yet Blacker by the pretence of Piety and Justice. Here’s a Country-man takes a Hawk in the Chase of a Pigeon, the Hawk reasons the Case with him; The Country-man Pleads the Pigeon’s Cause, and upon a Fair Hearing; The Hawk stands Condemn’d out of her own Mouth, and the Innocent is consequently deliver’d from her Oppressor. Now here’s One Violence Disappointed by Another; A Poor Harmless Wretch Protected against a Powerful Adversary; Justice done upon a Notorious Persecutor; and yet after All this Glorious semblance of a Publique Spirited Generosity, and Tenderness of Nature, the Man only sav’d the Pigeon from the Hawk, that he might Eat it Himself: And if we look Well about us we shall find This to be the Case of most Mediations, we meet with in the Name of Publique Justice.

Fab. CCLVIII. A Swallow and a Spider.

A Spider that Observ’d a Swallow Catching of Flies, fell Immediately to Work upon a Net to Catch Swallows, for she lookt upon’t as an Encroachment upon her Right: But the Birds, without any Difficulty, brake through the Work, and flew away with the very Net it self. Well, says the Spider, Bird Catching is none of My Talent I perceive; and so she return’d to her Old Trade of Catching Flies again.

The Moral.

A Wise Man will not Undertake any thing without Means Answerable to the End.

REFLEXION.

Let Every Man Examin his Own Strength, and the Force of the Enemy he is to Cope withal before he comes to Close, and Grapple with him: For he’s sure to go by the Worst that Contends with an Adversary that is too Mighty for him. ’Tis Good Advice not to Contend with Those that are too Strong for us, but still with a saving to Honesty and Justice, for the Integrity of the Mind must be supported against All Violence and Hazzards whatsoever. This of the Spider is a very Foolish Undertaking, and as Unjust a Pretence; for the Equity of the Case is Clearly Mistaken. The Intent of the Fable is to set us Right in the Understanding, and Interpreting of Injuries. ’Tis an unhappy Error to take things for Injuries that are Not so: And then supposing an Injury done, ’tis a Nice Point to Proportion the Reparation to the Degree of the Indignity; and to take a True Measure of our Own Force. It was a Ridiculous Project to think of Catching a Swallow in a Cobweb; and the Spider was as much Out too in thinking to Restrain the Common Air to its own Particular Use. The Swallow was a Fly-Catcher as well as the Spider, and no more an Inter-loper upon the Spider’s Right, then the Spider was upon the Swallow’s; for the Flies were in Common to Both. Those People, in short, deserve to be Doubly Laugh’d at, that are Peevish, and Angry; First, for Nothing, and secondly, to no manner of Purpose.

This Envious Injustice is Frequent in the World, for why should People think to Engrosse and Appropriate the Common Benefits of Fire, Air, and Water to Themselves; Not but that there are Swarms of This sort of State-Spiders in the World, that Reckon Every Fly that’s taken out of the Common-Stock, as a Penny out of their Own Pockets. The Bounties of God and of Princes ought to be Free, both alike, without making Every Morsel of Bread that an Honest Man puts in his Mouth to be the Robbing of a Minion, Wherefore let Every Man Compute, First, What he ought to do. Secondly, What he is Able to do. Provided Thirdly, That he Govern himself by the Rules of Vertue and Discretion. This Consideration beforehand, would have sav’d the Foolish Spider the Trouble of Setting Nets for Swallows.

Fab. CCLIX. A Country-man and a River.

A Country-man that was to Pass a River Sounded it up and down to try where it was most Fordable; and upon Tryal he made This Observation on’t: Where the Water ran Smooth, he found it Deepest; and on the contrary, Shallowest where it made most Noise.

The Moral.

There’s More Danger in a Reserv’d and Silent, then in a Noisie, Babbling Enemy.

REFLEXION.

Great Talkers are not always the Greatest Doers, and the Danger is Greatest, where there’s least Blustering and Clamour.

Much Tongue, and much Judgment seldom go together, for Talking and Thinking are Two Quite Differing Faculties, and there’s commonly more Depth where there’s Less Noise. We find it to be Thus Betwixt your Superficial Men, and Men that are well Founded in Any Art, Science, or Profession. As in Philosophy, Divinity, Arms, History, Manners. The very Practice of Babbling is a Great Weakness, and not only the Humour, but the Matter shews it so; though upon the Main, it is not Capable either of Much Good, or of Much Evil; for as there’s No Trusting in the Case, so there’s No Great Danger from them, in the Manage of any Design; for Many and Rash Words Betray the Speaker of them. As to the Man of Silence and Reserve, that keeps himself Close, and his Thoughts Private, He Weighs, and Compares Things, and Proceeds upon Deliberation. It is good to see and sound however, before a Man Plunges; for a Body may as well be Over-born by the Violence of a Shallow, Rapid Stream, as Swallow’d up in the Gulph of a smooth Water. ’Tis in This Case with Men as ’tis with Rivers.

Fab. CCLX. A Pigeon and a Pye.

A Pye was Wond’ring once to a Pigeon, why she would Breed still in the same Hole, when her Young Ones were constantly taken away from her before they were able to fly. Why That’s my Simplicity, says the Pigeon. I mean no Harm, and I suspect None.

The Moral.

Do as You would be done by, is a Better Rule in the Doctrine, then in the Practice: For Trust as you would be Trusted, will not hold betwixt a Knave and an Honest Man. There’s no Dealing with a Sharper but at his Own Play.

REFLEXION.

The Truer Hearted any Man is, the more Lyable is he to be Impos’d upon: And then the World calls it Out-witting of a Man; when, in truth he’s only Out-knav’d: And oblig’d, even in Charity and Good Nature, to Believe till he be Couzen’d. And we find the Country-man’s Observation Confirm’d by Daily Experience. This does not yet Hinder a sincere Singleness of Heart from being a Vertue so necessary for the Comfort and Security of Mankind, that Humane Society cannot subsist without it. And therefore ’tis a Thousand Pities it should be so Discountenanc’d, and Abus’d, as in the Common Practice of the World we find it is. But it stands Firm however to the same Tenor of Life. As the Pigeon kept still to the same Hole to lay her Eggs in what’ere she Lost by’t.

Fab. CCLXI. A Cuckow and a Hawk.

By the Beak, and the Claws of a Cuckow, one would take her for a kind of Hawk; only the One Lives upon Worms, and the Other upon Flesh: Insomuch that a Hawk Twitted a Cuckow One Day with her course way of Feeding. If you’ll Look like a Hawk, Why don’t you Live like a Hawk? The Cuckow took This a little in Dudgeon; but passing by a Pigeon-House some short time after, what should she see but the Skin of This very Hawk upon a Pole, on the Top of the Dove-House: Well! says the Cuckow (in Conceit) to the Hawk, and had not you as good have been Eating Worms now, as Pigeons.

The Moral.

Pride is an Abomination in the Sight of God, and the Judgment is Just upon us, when the Subject of our Vanity becomes the Occasion of our Ruine.

REFLEXION.

A Safe Mediocrity is much better then an Envy’d, and a Dangerous Excellency. They that in their Prosperity Despise Others, shall be sure in their Adversity to be Despis’d Themselves. It is much the same Case with Men of Prey, that it is with Birds of Prey. They take it for a Disparagement to Sort themselves with any Other then the Enemies of the Publique Peace: But Men that Live upon Rapine, are set up for a Marque, as the Common Enemy; and all Heads and Hands are at Work to destroy them.

Fab. CCLXII. A Country-man and an Ass.

As a Country-man was Grazing his Ass in a Meadow, comes a Hot Alarum that the Enemy was Just falling into their Quarters. The Poor Man calls presently to his Ass, in a Terrible Fright, to Scoure away as fast as he could Scamper: for, says he, we shall be Taken else. Well, quoth the Ass, and what if we should be Taken? I have One Pack-Saddle upon my Back already, will they Clap Another a Top of that d’ye Think? I can but be a Slave where-ever I am: So that Taken, or not Taken, ’tis all a Case to Me.

The Moral.

It’s some Comfort for a Body to be so Low that he cannot fall: And in such a Condition already that he cannot well be Worse. If a Man be Born to be a Slave, no matter to what Master.

REFLEXION.

Here’s a Fiction of an Alarum, and we’ll suppose it to be a False One too; for the Inventor has not Determin’d the Point. Now the Fancy will have more Force and Quickness in’t that Way, then T’other; and the Asses Reasoning upon the Case, will hold good both Ways alike: Only the Asses in the Moral are more Frightful then the Asses in the Fable. We shall be Taken else, is the Song of All Popular Male-Contents, when they design a Change of Government: And so they Hurry the Mobile Head-long upon the very Dread of Imaginary Chains and Shackles, into the Slavery they Fear’d: But some Asses are Wiser then Others: for the Multitude would Answer their Masters else in the One Instance, as the Animal here in the Emblem Answer’d His, in the Other: Here was no Scampering away at a Venture, without Fear, or Wit; No Sollicitous Enquiry whether the News was True or No: But the Mythologist has prudently, and for our Instruction, Cast those Two Circumstances out of the Question, and laid the Stress of it upon This single Issue. As who would say; In all Governments there must be Burdens to be Born, and People to Bear them: And who so proper to bear Those Burdens, as Those that Providence and Policy have Appointed and Design’d for that Office and Station? So that ’tis all one to the Common People who’s Uppermost (That is to say, upon the Matter of Ease and Liberty) for Asses must be Asses still, whoever Rides them, and Providence will keep the World in Order still, whoever Grumbles at it.

Fab. CCLXIII. A Fox and a Knot of Gossips.

A Fox that was taking a Walk one Night Cross a Village, spy’d a Bevy of Jolly, Gossiping Wenches, making Merry over a Dish of Pullets. Why Ay, says he; Is not this a Brave World now? A Poor Innocent Fox cannot so much as Peep into a Hen Roost, though but to keep Life and Soul together, and what a Bawling do you make on’t presently with your Dogs, and your Bastards! And yet You your selves can lie Stuffing your Guts with your Hens, and your Capons, and not a Word of the Pudding. How now Bold-Face, crys an Old Trot. Sirrah, we Eat our Own Hens, I’d have you to know; and what you Eat, you Steal.

The Moral.

There are Men of Prey, as well as Beasts of Prey, that Account Rapine as good a Title as Propriety.

REFLEXION.

This gives us to Understand, first, that a Man may do what he will with his Own; but he has Nothing to do with the Propriety of Another Body. Secondly, That People may do any Thing with Impunity, where there’s No body to call ’em to Account for’t; And that which is Death for One to do is Lawful for Another.

There are several Starts of Fancy, that Off-hand look well enough; but bring them to the Test, and there’s Nothing in ’em. The Fox’s Reproche here upon the Gossips, was a Frolique Pleasant enough; but without any Colour, or Congruity of Reason; and the Fallacy lies, from the same Thing done by several Persons, to the same Right of Doing it; though under Circumstances so Different, that there’s no Parity at all betwixt them upon the Collation. This Freak has somewhat of the Air in’t of the Young Fellow’s Conceit to his Father, when he took him Ruffling his Grand-Mother. Why may not I lie with your Mother, says he, as well as You lie with mine? These Foxes should do well to Consider, that High-Way-Men, and Other Criminals have as much to say for themselves, where there’s a Breach of Law, and Common Justice in the Case. This Instance of the Fox and the Gossips, comes to the Old Proverb; that One may better Steal a Horse then Another look over the Hedge.

Fab. CCLXIV. Capons Fat and Lean.

There were a Great many Cramm’d Capons together in a Coop; some of ’em very Fair and Fat, and Others again that did not Thrive upon Feeding. The Fat ones would be ever and anon making Sport with the Lean, and calling them Starvelings; till in the End, the Cook was Order’d to Dress so many Capons for Supper, and to be sure to take the Best in the Pen: when it came to That once, they that had most Flesh upon their Backs, wish’d they had had Less, and ’twould have been Better for ’em.

The Moral.

Prosperity makes People Proud, Fat, and Wanton; but when a Day of Reckoning comes, They are the First still that go to Pot.

REFLEXION.

The Fat Capons in This Fable, are the Rich, the Great, and the (Externally) Happy Men in the World. People Weigh Vertue, in Common Reputation, as they do Flesh in the Market, at so much a Pound. They Agree too in the Contempt of Men of a Less Size and Quality, and they Meet with the same Fate in the End too, by a Just Judgment upon them for their Insulting Vanity. They are made the very Mark for Envy, and Avarice to shoot at: and Equally in danger of being Sacrific’d, either to Tyranny, or to Faction. The Poor, in fine, have This Consolation, that their Condition is safer, and easier, then That of the Rich: And All People in the World will agree with Those Capons in the Fable, that it is better to Live Lean then to Dye Fat.

Fab. CCLXV. Oxen and a Piece of Timber.

The Timber was Complaining of the Ingratitude of the Oxen. How often, says the Timber, have I fed ye with my Leaves, and reliev’d ye under my Shadow? and for You to Drag me now at this rate, over Dirt and Stones! Alas! cry’d the Oxen: Do not you see how we Pant and Groan, and how we are Goaded on, to do what we Do? The Timber Consider’d how unwillingly they did it, and so Forgave them.

The Moral.

What we are forc’d to do by an Over-Ruling Power and Necessity, is not properly our own Act.

REFLEXION.

’Tis not the Thing that is Done, but the Intention in the Doing of it, that makes the Action Good, or Evil. There’s a Great Difference betwixt what we do upon Force, and what upon Inclination; and the Good Will is nevertheless Obliging, though by some Unlucky Accident it should be Diverted to my Ruine. Where there is neither Privity, nor Consent, there can be no Malice, and consequently no Crime, or Disobligation. For All other Misadventures Amount to no more in Truth, then That which we call Ill Luck, in the Accidents of Life, wherefore the Timber was in the Right to Forgive the Oxen here, and so shall We be too, if after the Doctrine, and Example of This Fable, we forgive one Another.

Fab. CCLXVI. Trees Streight and Crooked.

There was a Delicate Plantation of Trees that were All Well-grown, Fair and Smooth, save only One Dwarf among them that was Knotty, and Crooked, and the Rest had it in Derision. The Master of the Wood, it seems, was to Build a House, and Appointed his Workmen to supply the Timber out of That Grove, and to Cut down Every Stick on’t that they found fit for Service. They did as they were Order’d, and This Ill Favour’d Piece was left Alone.

The Moral.

Celebrated Beauties are seldom Fortunate.

REFLEXION.

’Tis a Felicity to be Plain, and Inconsiderable, where ’tis Dangerous to be otherwise. There are a Thousand Inconveniences that Attend Great Beauties and Fortunes, which the Poor and Deformed are Free from; Not but that it is Better to fall Honourably in the Service of the Publique, then to Survive, in the Scandal of an Unprofitable, and an Inglorious Life. The Moral gives us also to Understand, that Pride will have a Fall, and that No Personal Advantages can either Justifie, or Protect Great Men in their Insolence over their Inferiors. The Beautiful Trees go all to Wrack here, and only the Mis-shapen and Despicable Dwarf is left Standing.

Fab. CCLXVII. A Swan and a Stork.

A Stork that was Present at the Song of a Dying Swan, told her ’twas contrary to Nature to Sing so much out of Season; and Ask’d her the Reason of it? Why, says the Swan, I am now Entering into a State where I shall be no longer in Danger of either Snares, Guns, or Hunger: and who would not joy at such a Deliverance.

The Moral.

Death is but the Last Farewel to All the Difficulties, Pains, and Hazards of Life.

REFLEXION.

’Tis a Great Folly to Fear that which it is Impossible to Avoid; and it is yet a Greater Folly to Fear the Remedy of All Evils: For Death Cures All Diseases, and Frees us from All Cares. It is as Great a Folly again, not to Prepare our selves, and Provide for the Entertainment of an Inevitable Fate. We are as sure to go Out of the World, as we are that ever we came In to’t; and Nothing but the Conscience of a Good Life can Support us in That Last Extremity. The Fiction of a Swan’s Singing at her Death, does, in the Moral, but Advise, and Recommend it to us, to make ready for the Chearful Entertainment of our last Hour, and to Consider with our Selves, that if Death be so Welcome a Relief even to Animals, barely as a Deliverance from the Cares, Miseries, and Dangers of a Troublesome Life, how much a Greater Blessing, ought All Good Men to Account it then, that are not only Freed by it from the Snares, Difficulties, and Distractions of a Wicked World, but put into Possession (over and above) of an Everlasting Peace, and the Fruition of Joys that shall never have an End!

Fab. CCLXVIII. The Inconsolable Widow.

There was a Poor Young Woman that had brought her self e’en to Death’s Door with Grief for her Sick Husband, but the Good Man, her Father, did All he could to Comfort her. Come, Child, says he, We are All Mortal: Pluck up a Good Heart, my Girl; for let the Worst come to the Worst, I have a Better Husband in store for thee, when This is Gone. Alas, Sir, says she, what d’ye talk of Another Husband for? why you had as good have Struck a Dagger to my Heart. No, No; If ever I think of Another Husband, may——Without any more ado the Man dies, and the Woman immediately breaks out into such Transports of Tearing her Hair, and Beating her Breast, that every Body thought she’d have run Stark-Mad upon’t: But upon second Thoughts, she Wipes her Eyes; Lifts ’em up, and cries Heaven’s Will be done; and then turns to her Father, Pray, Sir, says she, About T’other Husband you were speaking of, Is he here in the House?

The Moral.

This Fable gives us to Understand, that a Widow’s Tears are quickly Dry’d up, and that it is not Impossible for a Woman to Out-live the Death of her Husband; and after All the Outrages of her Funeral Sorrow, to Propose to her self many a Merry Hour in the Arms of a Second Spouse.

REFLEXION.

Here’s the Figure of a Worldly Sorrow, and of a Worldly Love, drawn to the Life, from the Heart and Humour of a Right, Worldly Woman. Hypocrisie Out-does the Truth, in Grief, as well as in Religion. ’Tis too Fierce and Noisie, to be Natural; but the Ostentation supplies the Place of the Duty. If the Wives Transports had not been Counterfeit, they would have been as Certain Death as the Husband’s Disease: For Flesh and Blood is not able to bear up under so Intolerable a Weight. It is in short, only the Acting a Part, not the Discharge of a Flowing Passion; she takes the Hint; Plays her Roll; Cries out her Set time, and when the Farce is over, betakes her self from her Infirmity to her Philosophy; not forgetting the Politique Part all this while, of making her Mourning for One Husband, a Prologue to the Drawing on of Another.

And This is not the Poor Woman’s Case Alone, but many a Poor Man’s too; for the Extravagance holds for a Sick Wife, as well as for a Sick Husband. ’Tis Custom, Practice and Good Manners, in fine, that in a Great Measure Rules This Affair. People Proportion their Griefs to their Hopes, and their Tears to their Legacies. There is as much a Fashion in the Mourning Face, as in the Mourning Dress; and our very Looks must be in the Mode, as well as our Cloaths. This Hint Minds me of a Pleasant Droll of a Painter, to an Honourable Lady of My Acquaintance that was sitting for her Picture. Madam (says he) will your Ladiship be pleas’d to have your Lip drawn as they wear ’em now? It is a Notable Part of Good Breeding, to know When, and How, and how Much, and how Long to Cry; and Every Thing must be done too as they do it now. I speak This, as to the Method of a Widow’s Lamentations: But when the Husband’s Dead, the Play is Done; and then it comes to the Old Bear Garden Case, when the Bull had Toss’d a Poor Fellow that went to save his Dog: There was a mighty Bussle about him, with Brandy and Other Cordials to bring him to Himself again; but when the College found there was no Good to be done on’t, Well, Go thy ways Jaques, says a Jolly Member of that Society, There’s the best Back-Sword Man in the Field gone. Come, Play Another Dog. The Sick Husband here wanted for neither Slops nor Doctors, and Every Thing was in a Hurry too in Both Places Alike. The Man Dies, and the Woman Bethinks her self, Well, says she, There’s the Best Husband Gone that ever Woman had to do withal: But, Pray Sir, is T’other Husband in the House that you were speaking of? What is all This now, but directly to the Tune of The Butcher’s Back-Sword Man, and Playing Another Dog.

Fab. CCLXIX. A Wench Parting with her Sweet-Heart.

A Common Wench was Wringing her Hands, and Crying her self to Death almost; and what was the Business forsooth, but she had Newly Parted with her Sweet-Heart. Away, ye Fool you (says one of her Neighbours) to Torment your self out of your Life for such a Fellow as This! Nay, says the Lass, I am not so much Troubled at Parting with the Man; but he has Carry’d away his Coat too; and truly, when he had given me All he had in the World beside, methinks I might e’en have had That too as well as All the Rest.

The Moral.

Here’s a Mercenary Prostitute Drawn to the very quick, that lays her Profit more to Heart then her Love.

REFLEXION.

It seldom falls out that a Common Mistress troubles her Head much with Particular Inclinations, though there are some Mercenaries so Generous yet, in the Way of their Profession, that rather then not Trade at all, they’ll Trade to Loss. But This was not the Case of the Sorrowful Wight here in the Fable: Her Trouble was the Loss of the Coat, not the Loss of the Man. ’Tis the same Thing with Cheats and Sharpers, that ’tis with Whores; and the same Humour, in short, that we find in All Humane Beasts of Prey. There can be No Friendship where there’s Treachery; but there are Degrees in Treachery it self; As the Betraying of an Honourable Confidence, and of a Sacred Trust, is the Basest of All Perfidies. This Shuffling Inclination shews it self in us Betimes; And Children do Naturally Apply them selves to their Little Shifts and Frauds. Now ’tis not much Amiss to let them Understand so much of the Roguery of the World, as to secure them from being Wheedled, and Impos’d upon: Provided that under Colour of Teaching them to Discover Abuses, they be not Encourag’d to Practice them: For he that perfectly Understands False Play, lies under a Dangerous Temptation, at some time or Other, to make Use on’t. And when he’s Once In, ’tis no Easie Matter to get him Out again. Never was any Whore yet so Impudent, as not to feel some Touch of Modesty and Remorse, upon the First False Step she made: But Wicked People Harden by Little and Little, and so go on by Degrees, till they are past all Sense, either of Shame, or of Conscience. Cheating and Bawdry go together in the World, as well as in the Fable, and the Professors of the Trade are as Insatiable in the One way, as they are in the Other. When they have left a Poor Devil no Flesh on’s Back, they’l Quarrell for his very Skin too, as the Jilting Jade here did for her Cully’s Coat, when she had left him Nothing else.

Fab. CCLXX. A Fly upon a Wheel.

What a Dust do I Raise! says the Fly, upon the Coach-Wheel? and what a Rate do I Drive at, says the same Fly again, upon the Horse’s Buttock.

The Moral.

This Fly in the Fable, is Every Trifling Arrogant Fop in Nature, by what Name or Title soever Dignify’d, or Distinguished.

REFLEXION.

This may be Apply’d to well-nigh All sorts of Vain Persons and Humours: As Those that Assume to Themselves the Merit of Other Mens Services. Those that Talk, and Think, and Bussle, as if Nothing were done without them. All Meddlers, Boasters, and Impertinents, that Steal away the Reputation of Better Men for their Own Use. The World is Full, in fine, of these Pragmatical Flies, that Value themselves for being In at Every thing, and are found Effectually, at last to be just good for Nothing.

It is the Fortune, and it is the Humour of Weak and Trifling Men to Value themselves upon Idle and Trivial Matters; and many times, in Truth, upon Just Nothing at all: That is to say, upon a False Perswasion that they Do Things, which they do Not do, and Govern Affairs wherein they have No Manner of Interest. They Place a Reputation also upon Things that a Sober Man would be out of Countenance to Own, and Contend for the Credit of being the Authors of Fooleries. What a Dust do I Raise? says the silly Fly, And have we not Millions of Vain, Empty Pretenders in the World, that Talk at the same Rate, and with as Little Colour, either of Truth, or of Reason? ’Twas [I] carry’d such a Cause; such a Debate, such a Question. ’Twas [I] that Advis’d, Brought about, or Prevented This and That; when yet upon the Upshot, This same [I] was no more then the Fool, that fancy’d he play’d upon the Organ, when he only Drew the Bellows. Whence comes it now that Men Arrogate to Themselves thus, where they have Nothing to do, and Claim a Title, as Matter of Credit, to the Weakest Things in the World; but for want of Understanding the True Measures of Honour and Virtue: The Moral of This Vanity runs through All Degrees of Men, and All Functions. There’s Nothing so Great; There’s Nothing so Little, as not to Afford Subject for This Busie and Over-Weening Conceit to Work upon? No, not from the Modelling of Common-wealths; the Winning of Battels; the Saving, or the Recovery of Kingdoms, to the very Flies Raising the Dust here in the Fable.

Fab. CCLXXI. An Eele and a Snake.

You and I are so Alike, says the Eele to the Snake, that Methinks we should be somewhat a-Kin; and yet They that Persecute Me are afraid of You. What should be the Reason of this? Oh (says the Snake) because no body does Me an Injury but I make him smart for’t.

The Moral.

In All Controversies They come off Best that keep their Adversaries in fear of a Revenge.

REFLEXION.

Patience and Impunity, is an Encouragement to an Affront. The Divine Wisdom has appointed a Hell as well as a Heaven, to the End that Dread and Terror on the One Hand, may supply the want of Gratitude, Affection, and Good Nature on the Other: What is it but the Fear of Punishment that keeps the World in Order? And what but the Awe we stand in, of Majesty, and Power, that Supports the Dignity of Government. This Moral runs through the whole History of our Lives, for ’tis Every Man’s Case from Top to Bottom. Princes Themselves, without Stings, are no Better then Drones; and when the Sacred Character is Disarm’d, there’s no longer any Reverence to be Expected for the Person. When People find it Dangerous to Offend their Superiors, they’ll take care to Please them: And there’s as much Difference, upon This Point, between One Governor and Another (the Resemblance notwithstanding) as there is betwixt an Eele and a Snake.

Fab. CCLXXII. Seamen Praying to Saints.

It Blew a Terrible Tempest at Sea once, and there was one Seaman took Notice that the Rest of his Fellows were Praying severally to so many Saints. Have a care my Masters, says he, what you do; for what if we should All be Drown’d now before the Messenger can deliver his Errand: Would it not be Better, without going so far about, to Pray to Him that can Save us without Help? Upon this, they turn’d their Prayers to God Himself, and the Wind presently fell.

The Moral.

The Shortest, and Surest Way of Doing Bus’ness is Best.

REFLEXION.

’Tis Good to be sure, where our Salvation is at Stake; and to run no more Risque of the Main Chance, then of Necessity Must. What needs any Man make his Court to the Servant, when his Access is Open to the Master? And especially when that Master is as ready to Give, as the Petitioners to Ask. A Wise Man will take the Nearest and the Surest Way to his Journey’s End; and Commit no Bus’ness of Importance to a Proxy, where he may do’t Himself.

Fab. CCLXXIII. The Fishes and the Frying-Pan.

A Cook was Frying a Dish of Live Fish, and so soon as ever they felt the Heat of the Pan, There’s no Enduring of This, cry’d one, and so they all Leapt into the Fire; and instead of Mending the Matter, they were Worse now then Before.

The Moral.

The Remedy is many times Worse than the Disease.

REFLEXION.

Let a Man’s Present State be never so Uneasie, he should do well however to Bethink himself before he Changes, for fear his Next Remove should be Worse. This is according to the Common Understanding of the Allusion, though not so Agreeable perhaps to the True Reason of the Case: For it was not either Levity, or Impatience; but intolerable Pain, and Absolute Necessity, that made the Fish shift their Condition: So that the Moral would have born This Doctrine rather: That where we have Certain Death before us, and only This Choice, whether it shall be a Speedy or a Lingring Death, That which puts us soonest out of our Pain (though never so Sharp) is the more Eligible of the Two. But to take it according to the Old Proverb now; we Understand by [Out of the Frying-Pan into the Fire] That Things go from Bad to Worse.

Fab. CCLXXIV. A League of Beasts and Fishes.

The Beasts Enter’d into a League with the Fishes against the Birds. The War was Declar’d; but the Fishes, instead of their Quota, sent their Excuse, that they were not able to March by Land.

The Moral.

The Vanity of a Helpless Alliance.

REFLEXION.

There’s No Contracting of Alliances with Those that are out of Distance of Assisting in a Time of Need, in all Contracts, whether of Publique Alliance, and Commerce, or Particular Friendship, there must a Regard be had to Reciprocal Aid and Assistance, in case of any Distress; So that All the Circumstances of Ability, Disposition, Situation, Interest, &c. must be taken into Thought, and Rightly Understood, before the Bargain be Struck: for ’tis a Scandalous Oversight to Err in any of the Essentials to a Prudential, and a Beneficial Agreement: By which is Intended, any sort of Defect, or Incapacity that may Obstruct, or Frustrate the End of the League. Those Contracts are Ridiculous, and Void in Themselves, that shall pretend to Oblige us against Nature. For ’tis a Banter, not a Confederacy, to talk of Fishes Marching by Land, and Living out of their Element.

Fab. CCLXXV. A Covetous Ambassador.

A Certain Ambassador that was still Pester’d with Drums and Trumpets every where upon the Way of his Embassy, was willing to save his Money, and so had them put off still with This Answer: That his Excellency was in Deep Mourning for his Mother, and in no Humour for Musique. The Drums and Trumpets were at least as much Troubled at the Tydings, as the Ambassador Himself. This News came to the Ear of a Person of Honour, who presently made him a Condoling Visit. Pray, my Lord (says the Nobleman) how long may your Mother have been Dead? Why, says the Ambassador, ’tis now a Matter of Forty Years; which Expounded the Riddle, and put an End to That Controversy.

The Moral.

There is a Certain Agreeable Way of Fooling betwixt Jest and Earnest, that carries both Pleasure and Profit along with it; for it saves a Man’s Money One way, and his Credit Another.

REFLEXION.

According to the Old Moral, Covetous Men will make any shift to save Money: But this Allusion is the least Part of the Bus’ness. ’Tis no Easy Matter for People in many Cases to save their Money, and their Credit Both: But the Best Thing to be done, in the Disguise of a Base, and Sordid Humour, is the Managing of the Imposture with a Good Grace, and in such a Manner, that if a Man carries it off, there’s so much Money sav’d; and if he be Detected, there will be something Pleasant in the Frolique to Atone for a Secret Narrowness of Heart.

At this Rate of a Pretended Freak, or Whimsy, a Great many other Corruptions, and Imperfections may be so Palliated, as to take off much of the Scandal of them; for many a Wicked Thought is so Varnish’d over in the Practice, as to pass Muster among the Gay Arts of Gallantry and Conversation. The Thing above all Others to be Wish’d, Study’d, and Endeavour’d, is to have a Clear Mind, and to Lead a Life in so Conscientious a Probity of Manners, as in Thought, Word, and Deed, to make Good the Character of an Untainted Honest Man: But where This Discipline shall be found too Strict for Flesh and Blood, (and there’s no Living up to the Rigorous Exactness of Purity, and Justice) it will in such a Case, be the best of a Bad Game to keep Clear of Open Offence, and to give the Infirmity the Best Face that the Matter will bear. As the Ambassador, betwixt Jest and Earnest, Cast a Cloak of Railery over his Avarice.

Fab. CCLXXVI. An Old Friend and a Cardinal.

An Ingenious Cavalier, hearing that an Old Friend of his was advanc’d to a Cardinalate, went to Congratulate his Eminence upon his New Honour. Pray Sir, says the Cardinal, looking strangely upon him, Give me the Favour of your Name, and of your Bus’ness. I am come, says the Cavalier, to Condole with your Eminence, and to tell you how Heartily I Pity Men that are Over-charg’d with Dignity and Preferment; for it turns Peoples Brains to that Degree, that they can neither See, nor Hear, nor Understand, like Other Men; and makes them as Absolutely to Forget their Old Friends, as if they had never seen them before in their Lives.

The Moral.

Honours Change Manners.

REFLEXION.

This is a Reproof to the Pride and Vanity of Those Men, that when they come to be Advanc’d Themselves, forget all their Old Friends and Acquaintance, even Those that Rais’d them. This Fable is Humane Nature to the very Quick, only it has Two Handles to’t, and it would not be Fair, to take it in the Worst Sense, without somewhat of an Apology, or an Excuse for’t, where ’twill bear a Better.

It is almost as True in Philosophy as it is in Fact, and Common Practice, that Honours Change Manners. Men Assume other Thoughts; Other Opinions of Themselves; Nay, and almost Another Nature, when they Contract other Interests. The Stamp of Dignity Defaces, in some People the very Character of Humanity; and Transports them to such a Degree of Haughtiness, that they reckon it below the Quality of a Great Man, to Exercise either Good Nature, or Good Manners: As if Dignify’d Flesh and Bloud were not of the same Composition with other Men. Now what does all This Arrogance Amount to, more, then the Pride of an Ass in his Trappings; when ’tis but his Masters taking away his Top-Knot, to make an Ass of him again.

But we are yet to Distinguish betwixt Those that take State and Distance upon them, purely out of Pride and Humour, and Those that seem to do the same Thing, though in a Compliance with the Necessity of their Affairs. It is Impossible for a Publique Minister to be so Open and Easy to all his Old Friends and Acquaintance, as he was in the State of his Private Condition; and at the same Time, to Attend the Necessary Functions of his Office: But This may be All help’d out yet, by an Affability of Address, without any Offence, either to his Bus’ness, or to his Duty. A Word, an Action, a Countenance, manag’d with Honour and Discretion, is sufficient to Uphold the Reputation of his Character; for there are Artificial Ways of telling People what a Man would do if he Could, without a Surly Ostentation of an Unwillingness to do the Things, that Effectually are not in his Power. A Good Word, they say, Costs no more then a Bad: Beside that in the Cardinal’s Forgetting his Old Friend here, he did more Forget Himself.

Fab. CCLXXVII. A Young Droll and a Crooked Old Man.

A Gibing Young Knave happen’d to meet an Old Man, whose Age and Infirmity had brought his Body to the Shape of a Bent Bow. Pray Father (says he) will you sell your Bow? Save your Money ye Fool you, says T’other; for when You come to my Years, you shall have such a Bow for Nothing.

The Moral.

He that would not live to be Old, had best be Hang’d when he’s Young.

REFLEXION.

’Tis Irreverent, and Unnatural, to Scoff at the Infirmities of Old Age, since there’s no Avoiding them, but by Dying Betimes. We are all Born to Die, and Every jot as Certain that we shall go Out of This World, as that we are already come into’t; but whether by a Natural, or a Violent Death, we know not. Time and Humane Frailty will bring us to our End without the Help of any Contingencies, or Distempers by the By; So that our Decays are as much the Work of Nature as the First Principles of our Being: And the Boy’s Conceit of the Crooked Bow here, is no better then a Blasphemous Way of making sport with the Course of Providence: Beside the Folly of Scoffing at That in Another, which we our selves are sure to come to at Last, or Worse.

Fab. CCLXXVIII. An Old Fellow and a Young Wench.

There was a formal Piece of Gravity that liv’d to about Threescore and Ten, without ever so much as knowing a Woman from a Weather-Cock. The Devil Ought him a Shame, and paid him both Interest and Principal, in making the Old Doting Fop Marry a Young Girl. He would be often Complaining afterward, how Unluckily he had Dispos’d of his Time. When I was a Young Man, says he, I wanted a Wife, and now I’m an Old Man, my Wife wants a Husband.

The Moral.

The Common Fate of Unequal Matches, Especially in the Case of an Old Fellow, and a young Wench, where the Humour is as Contrary as Summer and Winter, Light and Darkness, or Day and Night.

REFLEXION.

There’s Nothing Good, or Natural, that’s out of Season. Nay the most Obliging Offices in Nature, and the Greatest Blessings under the Sun, lose much, both of their Value, and of their Relish, when they’re Mistim’d.

Fab. CCLXXIX. An Eagle and a Pye.

There was a Pert-Dapper Spark of a Mag-Pye, that fancy’d the Birds would never be well Govern’d, till he Himself should come to sit at the Helm. In This Freak he Petition’d the Eagle to take him into the Cabinet; For, says he, I have no Ill Turn of a Body for’t. I have my Tongue, and my Heels at Command; and can make as much Noise and Bustle, to as little purpose, as any He perhaps that flies between a Pair of Wings. He was going on in the History of his Qualifications, when the Eagle Graciously told him, how sensible he was of the Volubility both of his Tongue, and of his Manners, and so of his Faculties and Good Breeding; but, says he, you are so Confoundedly given to Squirting up and down, and Chattering, that the World would be apt to say, I had Chosen a Jack-Pudding for a Prime Minister.

The Moral.

Great Babblers, or Talkers, are a sort of People not fit either for Trust, Bus’ness, or Conversation.

REFLEXION.

The World is like to be well Govern’d, when Pyes and Daws shall take upon them to set up for Philosophers, Doctors of the Chair, and Men of State and Government. Things are Mightily out of Order in That Quarter, especially when Vain Fools come to be admitted into Business upon the Credit of their Own Word.

The Importunity of such a Fop, is Excellently set forth in the Qualifications of this Pye; for he Enforces the Reason of his Pretence, by the Clearest Arguments in the World against Himself. He would be a States-Man, because he is a Buffon; as if there went no more to the Making of a Councellor, then the Faculties of a Merry-Andrew, or a Tumbler. Here’s the Confident Ambition of a Foolish Twattling Pretender, on the One Hand, and a Just Reproof of him, in a most Reasonable Refusal, on the Other; to Teach us, that the Want of Shame, Brains, or Good Manners, does not presently Entitle Every little Skip-Jack to the Boards-End in the Cabinet. But Our Eagle here was not a Prince to Advance the Ministers of his Pleasures, to be Ministers of State, and to make his Sport his Bus’ness.

Fab. CCLXXX. A Country-man and a Mouse.

There was a Pleasant sort of a Poor Fellow had his House a fire; but his Misfortune did not make him lose his Good Humour. As it was all in a Flame, out Bolts a Mouse from the Ruins, to save herself: The Man Catches her, and throws her back again. Why thou Ungrateful Wretch (says he) to leave thy Friend now in Adversity that gave thee thy Bread in his Prosperity.

The Moral.

’Tis a Barbarous Faculty, an Ill-Natur’d Wit; that will rather Expose the very Life and Reputation of a Friend, then lose the Opportunity of a Jest.

REFLEXION.

’Tis the Practice, but it is the Baseness of the World too, for Men to Govern themselves Wholly by their Interest, and to Abandon All that’s Sacred and Honourable, for the saving of their Own Skins. Thus, says the Moral; but the Conceit was not worth the Life of the Poor Creature, and therefore the Allegory not to be Recommended; because it sets up a False Principle. There was place for Honour, Dignity of Mind, and Humanity to shew it self, in the Case, though but to a Poor Mouse: And there’s Nothing to be said in Defence of the Wanton Cruelty of Sacrificing a Life to a Jest: But to come now to the Ungrateful Point, the Bare Innuendo of it would stare so many People in the Face, that it were better pass’d over in silence; for the Moral drawn out at length, would be a Satyr against Mankind. And Millions of Men that carry their Heads High in the World, would fall under the Lash of the Country-man’s Exclamation here.

Fab. CCLXXXI. A Sick Hermit.

There was a very Good Man, that in the Five and Twentieth Year of his Age, fell into a Desperate Fit of Sickness, the Doctors sate upon him, and the whole College were of Opinion, that there was no saving of his Life without the Use of a Woman. The Poor Man lay Humming and Hawing a good While, betwixt the Sin and the Remedy; but in the End, he gave up himself wholly to the Physicians, to do with him as they thought fit. Upon this, the Doctors, by Consent, put a Good Armful of Warm Womans Flesh into the Bed to him, by way of a Recipe, and so laid him to Rest, till about some Two Hours after: At which time they came to see how the Prescription had Wrought; and there did they find the Poor Religious, Tearing his Hair, Beating his Breast, and Groaning as if his very Heart would break. So they fell presently to Reasoning, and Casing upon the Matter with him, and laying Comfortable Distinctions before him betwixt the Morality, and the Necessity of what was done. No, No, Gentlemen, says he, my Grief is not thereabouts; but it goes to the Heart of me to think how long I have liv’d in Ignorance; and that This Fit of Sickness should never take me sooner.

The Moral.

Flesh is Frail. When a Strong Appetite, and a Troublesome Virtue Meet in Competition, ’tis a Hard Matter for a Man to Resist the Temptation.

REFLEXION.

We may gather from hence, first, that People are Flesh and Blood in a Cell, as well as in a Palace. 2ly, That it is a very great Mastery, for a Man to stand Firm, in a Case, where Humane Frailty, Violent Inclinations, and the Preservation of Life it self, are in a Conspiracy against his Virtue. 3ly. That a very Pious Good Man may think himself Better then he Is, for want of an Occasion to try the Force of his Goodness and Resolution. 4ly. That when the Flesh and the Devil have once got the better of a Scrupulous Conscience, it puts a Man past All Sense of Shame, as well as of the Sin; to the Degree of Glorying in his Wickedness. The Holy Man was not so much Troubled, it seems, at the Use of the Remedy, as that he had not try’d the Experiment sooner. You may Talk what you will (says Lais) of your Philosophers and Learned Men; but I have as many Visits from Those Sparks as from Other People. And she was much in the Right on’t.

Fab. CCLXXXII. A Rich Man and a Foolish Servant.

A Rich Man had a Certain Block-headed Fellow to his Servant, and the Master would be saying to him at Every Turn, Well! Thou art the very Prince of Fools! I would I were, says the Man, in a Sawcy Huff once, for I should be the Greatest Emperor upon the Face of the Earth then, and You Your self should be One of My Subjects.

The Moral.

The Only Universal Monarch is the King of Fools; for the Whole Race of Mankind are his Subjects.

REFLEXION.

The Whole World is full of Fools, only He that’s the Least One is the Wisest Man. This would have been Well, if the Moralist had not given the Block-headed Servant too much Privilege: But the Ill Manners is suitable enough however, to the Character. It was such a kind of a Course Complement that Scotus put upon Charles the Bald, as they were Sitting together at a Table. The Emperor ask’d him Quid Interest (says he) inter Scotum & Sotum? (Playing upon the Conceit of Scot and Sot) [Mensa] says he. That is to say, the Table is between the Scot and the Sot: And so with the Liberty of a Buffon, the School-man turn’d the Sot upon the Emperor, in Law-Latin: This Booby’s Answer in the Fable, as Unmannerly as it was, had yet a Great deal of Truth in’t; for He that can Advance himself to be a King of Fools, may be Honestly Reputed within a Hairs Breadth of an Universal Monarch.

Fab. CCLXXXIII. A Widow had a mind to Marry.

Well! says a Widow in Confidence to a Friend of her’s. I am Utterly Undone for want of a Sober, Provident Husband, to look after my Estate; and there’s No bodies Advice that I had rather have then Yours. But pray, will you take This Along with you too; that for the Course, Common Bus’ness of Matrimony, as I am an Honest Woman, the very Thought on’t turns my Stomach; Very well, says the Confident, and now I know Your Mind, it shall go Hard but I’ll Fit ye. The Good Woman went her way for the Present, and the Next Day came to her again, quite Overjoy’d that she had found out a Man so Absolutely for her Turn. I have Provided ye a Man (says she) of Industry and Integrity; and one that Perfectly Understands all sorts of Bus’ness; and then for Turning Your Stomach, My Life for Yours, Madam, he’s not in a Condition to give you any Qualms That way. Away, Ye Fool You, says she; I Hate the Infirmity, though I Love the Virtue.

The Moral.

Women are All of a Make, and in some Things, most of them in a Mind. One Woman feels Another Womans Pulse in her Own Veins; and there’s no Halting before Cripples.

REFLEXION.

There’s No Disputing with a Man that denies Principles, and there are certain Præcognita in the Motions of Flesh and Bloud, as well as in the Philosophy of the Schools: In which Cases, we Understand our Duty without a Teacher, and Acquit our selves as we Ought to do, without a Prompter. That is to say, there are some Certain Fundamentals of Natural Justice, that we take for Granted, and Trust One Another for; as in the Proposition of our Widow here in the Fable, without any Need of Articles for the Performance of Covenants. The Widow, in short, play’d the Gipsy, and so did her Confident too, in pretending to Believe her: But there’s No Catching Old Birds with Chaff, for One Woman reads the Heart of Womankind in her Own Breast. She was a Fool to be Mealy-Mouth’d, where Nature speaks so Plain. There may be Exceptions ’tis True, to a General Rule, but none to an Universal. It was No Ill shift however, to come off withal, that in despite of All her Aversions, she was not yet for making a Virtue of Necessity. The Publisher of Mr. Selden’s Table Talk, Tells of a Girl that was worth Forty of Our Widow here, and an Honest Down-right, Plain Dealing Lass it was. The Wench was just newly Marry’d, and so soon as ever the Job was over, Pray Mother, says she, Must not I go to Bed now? No, No, Child, says Mamma, You must take Your Dinner first: Oh, says the Girl, and Then go to Bed I warrant ye. No, my Dear, not yet, says the Mother, You must Dance after Dinner. Ay, Ay, says the Girl again, and Then to Bed. No, No, says T’other, You must Sup first, and Dance again. Ay, Ay, and Then to Bed, says the Bride. This Girl did but speak the Widows Mind; for let Flesh and Bloud pretend what it will, to Bed, to Bed, will be the Bob of the Song.

Fab. CCLXXXIV. Town-Dogs and Country-Dogs.

’Tis a Common Thing upon the Passing of a Strange Dog through a Town, to have a Hundred Curs Bawling at his Breech, and Every Yap gets a Snap at him. There was One Particular Dog, that when he saw there was No saving his Skin by Running away, Turn’d upon his Pursuers, and then found upon the Tryal, that One set of Teeth was worth Two pair of Heels; for upon That Resolution, they All fell off, and Sneak’d their Way. A Captain took Occasion to Apply This Instance to his People. Fellow-Soldiers (says he) take This for a Rule, Those that run away are in more Danger then the Others that stand the Shock.

Fab. CCLXXXV. A Snake to Jupiter.

A Snake that found himself Persecuted by Men, appeal’d to Jupiter for Relief; who told him that it was his Own Fault; for (says he) if you had but Bit the First Man that Affronted ye; the Second would have taken Warning by’t.

The Moral of the Two Fables above.

The putting up of One Affront draws on Another.

REFLEXION.

This is No Ill Emblem of the Common People; that are Insolent so long as they are Fear’d, and Shrink, where they find Danger; for their Courage is Calculated to the Opinion they have of the Enemy. It is the Nature of All sorts of Mungril Curs, to Bawl, Snarle, and Snap, where the Foe flies before them; and to Clap their Tails between their Legs when an Adversary makes Head against them. There’s Nothing, in short, but Resolution, to carry a Man through All Difficulties: And since it is so Absolutely Necessary, the sooner it is Taken up, the Better it succeeds. ’Tis a Matter of very Evil Consequence, to let the Rabble offer Publique Affronts Gratis. A seditious Word leads to a Broyl, and a Ryot Unpunish’d, is but next door to a Tumult: So that the Bearing of One Indignity draws on Another. Bite the First Man that Affronts ye, and y’are safe for ever after.

Fab. CCLXXXVI. The Frogs and Tortoises.

As a Company of Frogs were Trifling and Playing up and down in a Meadow, some Tortoises, that look’d on, were Mightily Troubled that they could not do so too, but taking Notice a while after, how These Frogs were Pick’d up, and Destroy’d, by Birds and Fishes: Well (says One of ’em) ’tis better to Live Dull, and Heavy, then to Dye Light and Nimble.

The Moral.

Every Part and Creature of the Universe has its proper Place, Station, and Faculties Assign’d, and to Wish it Otherwise were to find Fault with Providence.

REFLEXION.

That which Nature has Allotted us is best for us, and it is Great Folly and Wickedness for People not to be Content with it, and Thankful for’t.

No Man knows Himself, or Understands his Own Condition, but by Comparison, and upon Experience. Our very Wishes, many times, are Mortal to us: and the very Granting of our Prayers, would but serve to make us still more and more Miserable. The Tortoise’s Shell was a Clog and a Burden, till they found it Necessary for the Defence of their Lives; and they Envy’d the Easyness and Lightness of the Frogs, till they saw them Joll’d to pieces, and Devour’d for want of a Buckler to Cover, and Protect them. But they came then to be of the Begger’s Mind, that stood Gaping at my Lady Devonshire’s Funeral: Here’s a Brave Sight, says she, and yet I Gad Bess, for all That, I had rather be a Live Begger then a Dead Countess. The Moral Concludes in This, that there can be No Thought of Security, or Quiet in This World, but in a Resignation to the Allotments of God and Nature. If the Tortoises had had their Wish, they had e’en been Pick’d up among the Frogs.

Fab. CCLXXXVII. The Mice and the Oak.

The Mice found it so Troublesome to be still Climbing the Oak for Every Bit they put in their Bellies, that they were once about to set their Teeth to’t, and bring the Acorns down to them; But some Wiser then some; and a Grave Experienc’d Mouse, bad them have a care what they did; for if we Destroy our Nurse at present, Who shall Feed us hereafter?

The Moral.

Resolution without Foresight is but a Temerarious Folly: And the Consequences of Things are the First Point to be taken into Consideration.

REFLEXION.

’Tis Ill done for any Man to Consult his Present Ease and Profit, without Computing upon the Trouble and Loss that may Ensue. ’Tis not safe to make any Present Resolutions without a Considerate Prospect into the Future. This is abundantly Moraliz’d in several Other Places. But the Mouse’s Question of Who shall Feed us hereafter? goes a great Way in the Resolution of All These Cases.

Fab. CCLXXXVIII. A Run-away Dog and his Master.

There was a Bob-Tail’d Cur, cry’d in a Gazette, and One that found him out by his Marks, brought him home to his Master; who fell presently to Reasoning the Matter with him, how Insensible, and Thankless a Wretch he was, to run away from One that was so Extream kind to him. Did I ever give you a Blow in my Life, says he, or so much as One Angry Word, in all the time that ever you serv’d me? No, says the Dog, not with Your Own Hands, nor with Your Own Lips; but you have given me a Thousand and a Thousand by your Deputy; and when I’m Beaten by my Master’s Order, ’tis my Master Himself, I reckon, that Beats me.

The Moral.

In Benefits as well as Injuries ’tis the Principal that we are to Consider, not the Instrument. That which a Man does by Another, is in Truth and Equity his own Act.

REFLEXION.

The Master here deals with the Dog, as Great Officers deal many times with Honest, Well-Meaning Men at Court. They speak ’em Fair Themselves, and Murder ’em by their Deputies: But still That which is done by the Principal’s Order, or with his Privity, or Approbation, is the Principal’s Act. The Servant is But the Master’s Instrument in the Case, as the Cudgel is the Servant’s; and they are Both under the same Command. When a Man happens to be Kill’d, we do not Impute the Murder to the Weapon that did the Execution, but to him that Manag’d it. This is much after the way of Treating Elephants. When an Elephant is taken in a Pit-fall, He that is design’d for the Master and Keeper of him, sets Other People to Prick and Teize him, and Then In comes He Himself, and under Pretence of taking his Part, falls foul upon his Enemies, and Rescues him. The Elephant takes This Man now for his Friend; Whereas, upon the Whole Matter, it was by His Order that he was both Taken and Beaten.

There’s Nothing more Frequent then this Shamming Way of Confederacy, betwixt Two Men in Power; when an Honest Patriot, for the Purpose, or a Loyal Subject is to be made an Owl of; by Consent of them Both. The One Affronts him, while the Other Cajoles and Pities him; Takes up his Quarrel, shakes his Head at it; Claps his Hand upon his Breast, and then Protests, and Protests, he Wonders at his Heart that my Lord should have so little Honour, as to Treat an Honest Gentleman at This rate. A Friend of mine has been at This sport many and many a time: And now upon the Whole Matter, This is no more at last then a Concerted Intrigue betwixt a Brace of Sharpers, that Laugh all the while at the whole Roguery in their Sleeves. The Master’s Good Words are a Greater Mortification to the Dog, then the Servants Blows.

Fab. CCLXXXIX. The Birds and Beetles.

The Birds were in a Terrible Fright once, for fear of Gunshot from the Beetles. And what was the Bus’ness, but the little Balls of Ordure that the Beetles had Rak’d together, the Birds took for Bullets: But a Sparrow in the Company, that had more Wit then his Fellows, bad ’em have a Good Heart yet, for how shall they reach us in the Air, says he, with Those Pellets, that they can hardly Roll upon the Ground.

The Moral.

Many People apprehend Danger where there’s None, and reckon themselves sure where there Is, for want of taking the True Measure of Things, and laying Matters Rightly together.

REFLEXION.

Vain Fears and Imaginations Cast a Mist before our Eyes, and not only Represent Real Dangers Greater then they Are, but Create Fantastical Difficulties, where in Truth there are None at all. The Birds were in a Mortal Apprehension of the Beetles, till the Sparrow Reason’d them into a Better Understanding of the Matter. How should they Hurt us in the Air, says the Sparrow, with Those Pellets, that they can hardly Move upon the Ground, which brought the Point to an Issue upon a very Logical Conclusion.

Fab. CCXC. A Bear and Bees.

A Bear was so Enrag’d once at the Stinging of a Bee, that he ran like Mad into the Bee-Garden, and Over-turn’d All the Hives in Revenge. This Outrage brought them Out in Whole Troops upon him; and he came afterwards to Bethink himself, how much more Advisable it had been to Pass over One Injury, then by an Unprofitable Passion to Provoke a Thousand.

The Moral.

Better pass over an Affront from One Scoundrel, then draw the Whole Herd of the Mobile about a Man’s Ears.

REFLEXION.

We are to learn from hence, the Folly of an Impotent, and Inconsiderate Anger; and that there’s no Creature so Contemptible, but by the Help of Resolution, and of Numbers, it may Gain its Point. The Heat and Thirst of Revenge does but Hurry People from Less Mischiefs to Greater; As One Hasty Word, or Blow, brings on a Thousand. There’s no Opposing the Torrent of a Head-strong Multitude; for Rage and Despair give Courage to the most Inconsiderable, and the most Fearful of Creatures. Had it not been Better now to have pass’d over the Affront of one Spiteful Creature, then to Provoke and draw on upon Himself the Outrage of a Thousand?

Fab. CCXCI. A Fowler and a Chaffinch.

A Fowler that had Bent his Net, and laid his Bait, Planted himself in the Bird-Catcher’s Place, to Watch for a Draught. There came a Great Many Birds One after Another, that Lighted, and Peck’d a While, and so away again. At this rate they kept Coming and Going all the Day long; but so few at a time, that the Man did not think ’em worth a Pluck. At last, when he had Slipt All his Opportunities in hope of a Better Hit, the Evening came on, and the Birds were gone to Bed, so that he must either Draw then or not at all; and in the Conclusion, he was e’en fain to content himself with one Single Chaffinch, that had the Misfortune to be Later Abroad then her Fellows.

The Moral.

Men are so Greedy after what’s to Come, which is Uncertain, that they Slip present Opportunities, which are never to be Recover’d.

REFLEXION.

Delays are Dangerous. The very Instant is All that we can call our Own, the Rest, is either Chance, or Fate. The Case of the Fowler and the Chaffinch, reaches to all the Pretensions of Humane Life. Every Man Living has a Design in his Head upon something or other, and Applies himself accordingly toward the Attaining of his End; whether it be Honour, Wealth, Power, or any other sort of Advantage, or Settlement in the World. Now he that would take a True Measure how to Proceed, should say to himself, This is the Thing I would be at. This or That in such a Proportion will do my Bus’ness; And This Nick of time is the Critical Occasion for the Gaining of such or such a Point. I’ll take it while ’tis to be had. He that may be well, and Will not, in hope of being Better, runs the Risque of getting Nothing at all; and so Parts with a Moral Certainty in Possession, for a Wild, and a Remote Possibility in Reversion. Lost Opportunities are never to be Recover’d. ’Tis Good Discretion, when we cannot Command what we would have, to Compound for what we May, and not to call any thing Ill Luck, which is in Truth Ill Manage. ’Tis a Weakness to be Sollicitous for more then enough, and to Hazzard All by Grasping at too much. All Covet, All Lose; for Avarice, whether it Succeeds or not, is but a kind of Beggary; and he that Wants More, has as Good as Nothing at all. The Bird-Catcher slipt his Time here, and makes Good the Old Vulgar Saying; He that will not when he May, When he Would he shall ha’ Nay.

Fab. CCXCII. A Soldier and Two Horses.

A Soldier that had One Excellent Horse already, bought Another that was not Half so Good, and yet he took more Care of That, then of the Former. Every body Wonder’d at the Humour of it, considering that for Beauty, or Service, the Latter was not Comparable to the Other. Ay, but says One, ’tis Natural to be Kind to the Last Comer.

The Moral.

Our Likings or Dislikes are Founded rather upon Humour and Fancy then upon Reason. Every thing pleases at First; and Nothing Pleases Long; and we shift only to Try if we can Mend our selves in the Next Choice.

REFLEXION.

We are apt to put a Value upon Things for their Novelty, rather then for their Virtue: and the fame Levity holds towards Women, Friends and Acquaintances: Nay, and Governments too; for People seldom Change for a Better. All Civil Constitutions have their Failings, and the Unhinging, even of the Worst of Governments, brings on an Anarchy, which is yet Worse; for it lays All in Rubbish: And we have no better Security for the Next State of Things, then we had for the Former, but still for Variety sake, we go on Chopping and Changing our Friends, and our Masters, as well as our Horses; and with the Soldier, out of a Sickly Levity, like the Last Best, whatever it be.

Fab. CCXCIII. A Spaniel and a Sow.

I wonder (says a Sow to a Spaniel) how you can Fawn thus upon a Master that gives you so many Blows, and Twinges by the Ears. Well (says the Dog) but then set the Good Bits, and the Good Words he gives me, against Those Blows and Twinges, and I’m a Gainer by the Bargain.

The Moral.

He that will Live Happily in This World, must Resolve to take the Good and the Bad Thankfully and Contentedly One with Another.

REFLEXION.

Without a Strict Hand over us, in the Institution of our Youth, we are in Danger to be Lost for ever. He that Spares the Rod, Hates the Child; and the Severity of an Early Discipline is One of the Greatest Obligations that a Son can have to a Tender Parent. This we shall find to be True, if we do but set the Good against the Bad, as the Dog did the Knocks, and then Ballance the Account.

Fab. CCXCIV. Oxen and Timber.

Why don’t you Run and Make Hast? cry’d the Timber in the Cart, to the Oxen that Drew it: The Burthen is not so Heavy sure. Well! (said the Oxen) if You did but know Your Own Fortune, you’d never be so Merry at Ours. We shall be Discharg’d of our Load so soon as we come to our Journies End, but You that are Design’d for Beams and Supporters, shall be made to bear till your Hearts break. This Hint brought the Timber to a Better Understanding of the Case.

The Moral.

’Tis Matter of Humanity, Honour, Prudence, and Piety, to be Tender One of Another; for no Man Living knows his End, and ’tis the Evening Crowns the Day.

REFLEXION.

It is both Base, and Foolish, to Insult over People in Distress, for the Wheel of Fortune is perpetually in Motion, and He that’s Uppermost to day, may be Under it to Morrow. No Man knows what End he is Born to; and it is Only Death that can Pronounce upon a Happy or a Miserable Life. When the Timber made sport with the Oxen for the Drudgery they Labour’d under, Little did they Dream of the Greater Oppression they were to Undergo Themselves.

Fab. CCXCV. A Goldfinch and a Boy.

A Goldfinch gave his Master the Slip out of the Cage, and he did what he could to get him Back again, but he would not come. Well! says the Boy, You’ll live to Repent it; for you’ll never be so well Look’d to in any Other Place. That may very Well be, says the Bird; but however, I had rather be at my Own Keeping then at Yours.

The Moral.

Never Well; Full nor Fasting.

REFLEXION.

Meat, Drink, and Ease can never make any Man Happy that wants his Liberty. No, nor any Man that has it neither; for we are never Well, either with Much or Little. Whatever we Have, we Want something else, and so go on Wanting and Craving, till Death takes us off in the Middle of our Longings. He that’s a Pris’ner, is Troubled that he cannot go whither he Would; And He that’s at Large, is as much Troubled that he does not know whither to Go. The One Stands still: and the Other Loses his Way. Now ’tis not Necessity, but Opinion that makes People Miserable, and when we come once to be Fancy-Sick, there’s No Cure for’t. A Man may have his Heels at Liberty, and yet be a Slave to Impotent Affections, and Troubled Thoughts. But This is not, upon any Terms to Undervalue the Blessings of a Natural Freedom; and the Goldfinch was undoubtedly in the Right, when he was once out of the Cage, not to be Whistled back again, if it had not been that he carry’d his Snare along with him.

Fab. CCXCVI. A Droll and a Bishop.

There was a Roguy Wag of a Droll that had a Mind once to put a Trick upon a Hard, Close-fisted Bishop: so he went to him upon the First of January to Wish him a Merry New-Year on’t, and begg’d a Five-Guinea-Piece of him for a New-Years-Gift. Why, the Man’s Mad (says the Prelate) and I believe he takes me to be so too. Dost think I have so Little Wit, as to Part with such a Gob of Money for God-a-Mercy? Nay, my Lord (says the Fellow) if That be too much, let it be but a Single George, and I’ll be Thankful for’t; But That would not do Neither. He fell next Bout to a Copper Farthing, and was Deny’d That too. When the Fellow saw that there was no Money to be got, Pray (my Lord, says he) let me beg your Blessing then. With all my Heart (says the Bishop) Down on your Knees, and You shall have it: No, My Lord (says T’other) ’tis My Turn now to Deny; for if You Your self had thought That Blessing worth a Copper Farthing, you’d never have Parted with it.

The Moral.

No Penny, No Pater Noster, does not hold in All Cafes; for the Penny and the Pater Noster do not go always together.

REFLEXION.

There’s No Corruption like Ecclesiastical Avarice; No Cruelty so Merciless as That of a Debauch’d Church-man. ’Tis the Devil’s Master-Piece to begin There; for he knows very Well, that the Scandalous Examples of a Perfidious, and an Apostate Clergy, are the Ready Way to bring the Holy Order of Priesthood it self into Odium, and Disgrace. Here’s Your Church, they cry presently; as if the very Function were Unhallow’d by the Mercenary Practices of some Backsliding Members of that Communion. Let them Live as they Preach, and Preach as they Ought, and let there be No Moralizing in the Pulpit upon the Fable of the Man, and the Satyr, by Blowing Hot and Cold out of the same Mouth. There are Simoniacal Contracts on the Buying side, as well as on the Selling, when People shall Preach One Doctrine to get Into a Living, and the Contrary to Keep it. What is This, but the Selling of the Truth, and of Souls, for Money, and the Prostituting of All that’s Sacred, for the saving of their Skins and their Stakes?

Not but that Charity is Free, and much at the Discretion of Him that is to Exercise it. It is Free, I say, to All Intents and Purposes, as to any Legal Coertion upon it, though at the same time, in Point of Conscience, a Man may lye under the Obligation of an Indispensable Duty. So that without forcing the Drift of this Fable, the Bishop is not to Blame here, the Matter simply Consider’d; for the First, Second, or Third Denyal, or for All together; for such Circumstances may be Suppos’d, with a Regard to the Manner, Time, and Persons, as might not only Acquit him for the Refusal, but have Reflected upon his Conduct, and Prudence, if he had Granted the Request: So that (with Veneration to the Divine Institution it self, and to Those that Live up to’t) we are to take This for the Figure of a Loose and a Covetous Prelate, that Disgraces his Character by his Conversation, and sets a Higher Rate upon a Copper Farthing, then upon an Apostolical Benediction. Now if This Bishop could have said, Silver and Gold have I none, the Author of This Fable would have Absolv’d him.

Fab. CCXCVII. A Lapwing Preferr’d.

Upon a General Invitation to the Eagle’s Wedding, there were several Birds of Quality among the Rest, that took it in Heavy Dudgeon to see a Lapwing Plac’d at the Upper End of the Table. ’Tis true, they cry’d, he has a kind of a Coxcomb upon the Crown of him, and a Few Tawdry Feathers; but Alas, he never Eat a Good Meals Meat in his Life, till he came to This Preferment.

The Moral.

’Tis a Scandal to a Government, and there goes Envy along with it, where Honours are Conferr’d upon Men for Address, Beauty, and External Advantages, rather then for their Good Qualities and Virtues.

REFLEXION.

’Tis a Necessary Caution in All Preferments that they be Plac’d upon Fit Men; for the Right Motives; and for the Right Ends. The Advancing of a Fantastical Fool, or Lapwing, Reflects upon the Raiser of him; for ’tis an Ill sign, the very Liking of an Ill Man, and Implies, at least a Tacit Approbation of the Officers Defects. The Preferring of People indeed to Honourable Charges and Commissions, without either Brains, Bloud, Fortune, or Merit, may be so far Reputed a Great Work, as the making of Something out of Nothing, seems to be next door to a Creation: But the Character at last will not Excuse the Person so Dignify’d, from Open Envy and Secret Contempt, Where it falls out that the True Reason of the Choice, is either Fancy without Judgment, or Credulity without Enquiry, Information, or Tryal; the Latter is the more Harmless Mistake of the Two; for there’s somewhat of Generous in the Confidence, Notwithstanding the Error of the Facility: And as He that Trusts, to This Degree, does deserve not to be Deceived; so He that Betrays such a Trust, on the Other Hand, is not Worthy to Live. An Ill Reason, in fine, for an Ill Choice, is Worse then No Reason at all; for to proceed upon a Wrong Reason, is to Build upon a False Foundation. Will and Pleasure is the Only Plea This Case will bear; for the Authority of the Eagle her self, we see, was not sufficient to Vindicate a Worthless Minion from Reproche and Scorn.

Fab. CCXCVIII. A Priest and Pears.

A Jolly Gutling Priest, that was Invited to a Wedding-Dinner, Stumbled upon a parcel of Pears by the Way. The Man was sharp enough set to have made a Breakfast of them, but so taken up with the thought of the Wedding Chear, that he only Pist upon the Pears in Contempt, and so went his Way. He was to Cross a River it seems, but finding the Waters so High, that there was No Passing, he was e’en glad to Trudge back again as Wise as he came, and to make a Meal of Those very Pears that he had Pist upon and Despis’d.

The Moral.

Hunger’s the Best Sauce.

REFLEXION.

This Fable shews us, that Delicate and Squeamish Humours in the Matters of Meats and Drinks, are Freak, and Phansy, rather then upon any Account of Nature, or Reason. (Some Few Insuperable Aversions only Excepted) There is a Pride, and an Affectation of Singularity, that is never to be pleas’d with any thing that’s Cheap and Common; and there’s also a Sensual Intemperance for the Gratifying of the Palate; but Necessity, and No Choice cures either of These Evils. The Priest did Ill in Vilifying These Pears; for All the Fruits of the Earth are the Gifts of Providence, which we ought to have a Reverence for: And he did Foolishly too in not Considering, that he Himself might come to stand in Need of them. But he was forc’d, in the Conclusion, to Eat That Himself, which he had made Unfit for any body else, and there was his Punishment. A Squeamish Fastidious Niceness in Meats and Drinks, must be Cur’d as we Cure Agues, by Starving.

Fab. CCXCIX. A Horse and a Hog.

A Hog took Notice of a Horse in the Height of his Courage, that was Just Advancing to Charge an Enemy, Why what a Fool art thou, says the Hog to him, to make such Haste to be Destroy’d? That Consideration, says the Horse, may do well enough in the mouth of a wretched Creature that’s only Fatted up to be Kill’d by a Knife, but whenever I’m taken off, I’ll leave the Memory of a Good Name Behind me.

The Moral.

’Tis the Cause makes the Martyr.

REFLEXION.

He that Consults the Interest of his Carcass, before that of his Repution, or his Country, is Effectually but a Brute, under the Figure of a Man. An Honourable Death is to be Preferr’d before an Infamous Life. This Hog in the Fable has but taken up the Words and Humour of a Bestial sort of People in the World: Men that lie Wallowing in their Lusts, their Debauches, and their Pleasures, and spending their Censures upon Men of Honour, and Publique Spirits, without any Regard to the Conscience of either Christian, Moral, or Political Duties. They are more Solicitous for the Pampering of their Bodies, then for the Saving of their Souls, or the Embalming of their Memories: and fall justly under the Reproof of the Horse to the Hog in This Emblem.

Fab. CCC. A Hunts-man and a Currier.

A Currier bought a Bear-Skin of a Hunts-Man, and laid him down ready Money for’t. The Hunts-Man told him that he would Kill a Bear next day, and he should have the Skin. The Currier, for his Curiosity, went out with the Hunts-Man to the Chace, and Mounted a Tree, where he might see the Sport. The Hunts-Man Advanc’d very Bravely up to the Den where the Bear lay, and threw in his Dogs upon him. He Rustled out Immediately, and the Man Missing his Aim, the Bear Overturn’d him. So the Fellow held his Breath, and lay Stone still, as if he were dead. The Bear Snuffled, and smelt to him; took him for a Carcass, and so left him. When the Bear was gone, and the Danger over, down comes the Currier from the Tree, and bad the Hunts-Man Rise. Heark ye, my Friend, says the Currier, the Bear Whisper’d somewhat in your Ear, What was it, I prethee? Oh (says the Hunts-Man) he bad me have a Care for the Future, to make sure of the Bear, before I Sell his Skin.

The Moral.

Let no Man Undertake for more then he is able to make Good.

REFLEXION.

This is to bid us secure our selves Before hand of what we Undertake for, and not depend upon Uncertainties. Though with the Moralist’s Leave, the Uncertainty was on the Other Hand, and he that Bought the Skin, ran a Greater Risque then T’other that Sold it; and had the Worse End of the Staff. ’Tis Good Councel however, not to make our selves Answerable for Things out of our Power: Especially where there are Dangerous Contingencies in the Way, as we find in This Fable: For the Bear was within a Hairs Breadth of Spoiling the Jest: It is much at this Rate that we make All our Bargains; We give our Time, Study, Interest, Liberty, and, in short, part with all that’s Precious, not only upon Uncertainties, but for Things we can never Obtain. There’s no depending upon To-morrow.

Fab. CCCI. A Hermit and a Soldier.

There was a Holy-Man that took a Soldier to Task, upon the Subject of his Profession, and laid before him the Hazzards, the Sins, and the Troubles that Attend People of that Trade; Wherefore, says he, for your Souls sake, Sir, Pray give it over. Well! Father, says the Soldier; I’ll do as you bid me; for really we are so Ill paid, and there’s so little to be Gotten by Pillage, that I Phansy I had e’en as good Betake my self to a Godly Life.