Act 2 — ACT II

SCENE I

(A front scene. A poor hut or tent, the Princes are coming in slowly, some limping. They are in Wrenboys' clothes and the masks are in their hands.)

1st Prince: This should be the hut where the Wrenboys told us to come.

2nd Prince: It is a poor looking place.

3d Prince: It is good to have any place to sit down in for a while. My back is aching.

4th Prince: My feet are all scratched and torn. There are blisters rising.

5th Prince: I thought we would never come to the end of the road. The stones by the lake were so hard and so sharp.

1st Prince: It was a root of a tree I fell over that made these bruises on my knees. I was watching a hawk that was still and quiet up in the air, and when it made a swoop all of a sudden I stumbled and fell.

2nd Prince: It was in slipping where the rocks are high I gave this twist to my arm. I can hardly move it.

3rd Prince: But wasn't the sight of the sunset splendid over the lake? And the hills so blue!

4th Prince: I like the tall trees best. I tried to climb up one of them, but it was so smooth I did but slip and fall.

1st Prince: I would wish to walk as far as the hills, and to have a view of the ocean that is beyond.

5th Prince: I am hungry. I wonder where we will get our supper.

4th Prince: Not in this place, anyway, it must be making ready in some big guesthouse.

3rd, Prince: What will they give us, I wonder?

2nd Prince: I wish we had in our hand what they have ready for us at home.

1st Prince: What use would it be to us? Do you remember what we asked to be given, some jellies and a few grapes? It is not that much would satisfy me now.

2nd Prince: Indeed it would not. I never felt so sharp a hunger in my longest memory.

3rd Prince: It is roasted meat I would wish for.

4th Prince: There were pigeons in the tall trees. They will maybe give us a pigeon pie.

5th Prince: I would be content with a plate of minced turkey with poached eggs.

1st Prince: I would sooner have a roasted chicken, with bread sauce.

2nd Prince: Be quiet.... I think I hear someone coming! (Looks out.)

3rd Prince: (Looking out.) I see him. He is not a right man ...he is very strange looking....

4th Prince: (Looking out.) Oh! It is an Ogre! A Grugach!

(All shrink back and hurriedly put on masks.)

Ogre: (Coming in: he wears a frightful mask, has red hair and a cloak of rough skins and carries a whip with many lashes.) What makes ye late to-night, ye young schemers? What was it delayed ye? Lagging along the road.

1st Prince: We came as fast as we could. It was getting dusk in the wood.

Ogre: Dusk, good morrow to you! I'll dusk ye! I had a mind to go after ye and to change myself into the form of a wolf, and catch a hold of ye with my long sharp teeth!

2nd Prince: We did not know there was any great hurry.

Ogre: There is always hurry when you are on my messages. What did I bring you away from your own house for and put ye on the shaughraun for and keep ye wandering, if it was not to be serviceable and helpful to myself. Show me now what ye have in your pocket or your bag.

3rd Prince: This is all we got in the bag. (Holds it out.) It is but very little.

Ogre: (Turning it out and counting it.) Coppers! Silver! What is this? A piece of gold! Is that what ye call little? What notions ye have! Take care did ye keep any of it back! If ye did I'll skin ye with the lash of my cat-o'-nine-tails. (Shakes it.)

4th Prince: That is all we got. It should maybe pay for our supper in some place.

Ogre: What supper? To go buy supper with my money! It will go to add to my store of treasure in the cave that is under ground.

5th Prince: We are hungry, very hungry. When will the supper be ready?

Ogre: It will be ready whenever ye will ready it for yourselves. Ye should know that by this time.

1st Prince: We would make it ready if we were acquainted with the way.

Ogre: It is gone cracked ye are? What is it ye are thinking to get for your supper? What ailed ye that ye didn't climb a tree and suck a few pigeon's eggs?

2nd Prince: We were thinking of a pigeon pie.

Ogre: A what!!!

2nd Prince: A pigeon pie.

Ogre: Hurry on then making your pigeon pie! There are pigeons enough there in the corner, that a hawk that is my carrier brought me in a while ago. And there's a pike that was in the lake these hundred years, an otter is after leaving at my door.

3rd Prince: (Taking a pigeon.) I don't think this is a right pigeon.

4th Prince: Pigeons in a pie are not the pigeons that have feathers.

5th Prince: (To Ogre.) Please, sir, where can we find pigeons without feathers, that are trussed on a silver skewer?

Ogre: Aye? What's that?

1st Prince: Never mind. You'll anger him. Maybe we can pull the feathers off these. I have read of plucking a pigeon in our books. (They begin to pluck.)

2nd Prince: It is very hard work.

3rd Prince: I never knew feathers could stick in so hard.

4th Prince: The more we pull out the more there would seem to be left.

5th Prince: It will be a feather pie we will be getting in the end.

1st Prince: (Throwing it down.) It is no use. We might work at it to-day and to-morrow and be no nearer to a finish.

2nd Prince: The pike might be better.

3rd Prince: It has no feathers anyway.

4th Prince: (Touching it.) It is raw and bleeding!

5th Prince: We might roast it.

1st Prince: The fire is black out.

2nd Prince: I wonder what way can we kindle it?

3rd Prince: Better ask him. (Points to Ogre.)

2nd Prince: Please, sir, what way can we kindle the fire?

Ogre: What!

4th Prince: We would wish to light the fire.

Ogre: Well, do so.

5th Prince: If we had a box of matches....

Ogre: Matches! What are you talking about? Matches won't be invented for the next seven hundred years.

1st Prince: What can we do then, we are starving with hunger.

Ogre: Let ye blow a breath upon a coal under the ashes, and bring in small sticks from the wood.

2nd Prince: (Blowing.) The ashes are choking me.

Ogre: Very good. Then you'll put no delay on me, waiting till you'll cook your supper.

3rd Prince: Where can we get it then?

Ogre: You'll go without it, as you were too helpless to catch it, or to dress it, there's no one will force you to eat it.

4th Prince: If there is nothing for us to eat we had best pass the time in sleep.

5th Prince: I am all covered with ashes and dirt. (To Ogre.) Please, where can I find a towel and a piece of soap?

Ogre: Soap! Is it bewitched ye are or demented in the head? Did ever anyone hear of soap unless of a Saturday night? Letting on to be as dainty and as useless as those young princes beyond, that are kept closed up in a tower of glass. Come on now. If there is no food that suits you, leave it. It is time for us to get to work.

1st Prince: But it is bed-time.

Ogre: Your bed-time is the time when I have no more use for you. Don't you know I have made a plan? What was it I sent you for, spying out that place of the young princes? Wasn't it to see where is it that treasure is kept, the golden-handled sword of Justice that is used by the Guardian when he turns Judge.

2nd Prince: That is kept in the Courthouse.

Ogre: That's right ...in what part of it?

3rd Prince: What do you want it for?

Ogre: I have it in my mind this long time to get and to keep it in my cave under ground, along with the rest of my treasures that are in charge of my two enchanted cats. I have had near enough of grubbing for gold with a pick in the clefts and crannies of the earth. It is time for me to find some rest, and get into my hand what is ready worked and smelted and purified. We are going to that Courthouse to-night. If we cannot get in at the door, I will put ye in at the window and ye can open the door to myself. I will find out where the sword is, and away with us, and it in my hand.

4th Prince: But that would be stealing.

Ogre: What else would it be?

4th Prince: But that is wrong. It is against the law.

Ogre: The law! That is the Judge's trade. Breaking it is mine.

5th Prince: Ask him for it and maybe he will give it to you, he is so kind.

Ogre: I'll take no charity! What I get I'll earn by taking it. I would feel no pleasure it being given to me, any more than a huntsman would take pleasure being made a present of a dead fox, in place of getting a run across country after it. Come on now! We'll have the moon wasted. We'll hardly get there before the dawn of day.

1st Prince: Whatever time you get there the Guardian will be awake. There is a cock of Denmark perched on the curtain rod of his bed, specially to waken him if there is any stir.

Ogre: There is, is there? What a fool you think me to be. Do you see that pot?

2nd Prince: We do see it.

Ogre: Look what there is in it.

3rd Prince: Nothing but a few bare bones.

Ogre: Well, that is all that is left of the Judge's cock of Denmark, that was brought to me awhile ago by a fox that is my messenger, and that I have boiled and ate and devoured.

All the Princes: O! O! O!

Ogre: (Cracking his whip.) He was boiled in the little pot. Come on now and lead the way, or I give you my word it is in the big pot your own bones will be making broth for my breakfast in the morning! (Cracks whip.) Now, right about face! Quick march!

CURTAIN