Volume 10 — HOW THE MONEY GOES

BY JOHN G. SAXE

How goes the Money?—Well, I'm sure it isn't hard to tell; It goes for rent, and water-rates, For bread and butter, coal and grates, Hats, caps, and carpets, hoops and hose,— And that's the way the Money goes! How goes the Money?—Nay, Don't everybody know the way? It goes for bonnets, coats and capes, Silks, satins, muslins, velvets, crapes, Shawls, ribbons, furs, and furbelows,— And that's the way the Money goes! How goes the Money?—Sure, I wish the ways were something fewer; It goes for wages, taxes, debts; It goes for presents, goes for bets, For paint, pommade, and eau de rose,— And that's the way the Money goes! How goes the Money?—Now, I've scarce begun to mention how; It goes for laces, feathers, rings, Toys, dolls—and other baby-things, Whips, whistles, candies, bells and bows,— And that's the way the Money goes! How goes the Money?—Come, I know it doesn't go for rum; It goes for schools and sabbath chimes, It goes for charity—sometimes; For missions, and such things as those,— And that's the way the Money goes! How goes the Money?—There! I'm out of patience, I declare; It goes for plays, and diamond pins, For public alms, and private sins, For hollow shams, and silly shows,— And that's the way the Money goes!