[Steele.
Reading edition
Thursday, March 2, to Saturday, March 4, 1709-10.
Sheer Lane, March 3.
While the attention of the town is drawn aside from the reading us writers of news, we all save ourselves against it is at more leisure. As for my own part, I shall still let the labouring oar be managed by my correspondents, and fill my paper with their sentiments, rather than my own, till I find my readers more disengaged than they are at present.[131] When I came home this evening, I found several letters and petitions, which I shall insert with no other order, than as I accidentally opened them, as follows:
"Sir, March 1, 1709-10.
"Having a daughter about nine years of age, I would endeavour she might have education; I mean such as may be useful, as working well, and a good deportment. In order to it, I am persuaded to place her at some boarding-school, situate in a good air. My wife opposes it, and gives for her greatest reason, that she is too much a woman, and understands the formalities of visiting and a tea-table so very nicely, that none, though much older, can exceed her; and with all these perfections, the girl can scarce thread a needle: but however, after several arguments, we have agreed to be decided by your judgment; and knowing your abilities, shall manage our daughter exactly as you shall please to direct. I am serious in my request, and hope you will be so in your answer, which will lay a deep obligation upon,
"Sir, "Your humble Servant, "T. T.
"Sir, pray answer it in your Tatler, that it may be serviceable to the public."
I am as serious on this subject as my correspondent can be, and am of opinion, that the great happiness or misfortune of mankind depends upon the manner of educating and treating that sex. I have lately said, I design to turn my thoughts more particularly to them and their service: I beg therefore a little time to give my opinion on so important a subject, and desire the young lady may fill tea one week longer, till I have considered whether she shall be removed or not.[132]
"Mr. Bickerstaff, "Chancery Lane, February 27, 1709.
"Your notice in the advertisement in your Tatler of Saturday last[133] about 'whetters' in and about the Royal Exchange, is mightily taken notice of by gentlemen who use the coffee-houses near the Chancery office in Chancery Lane; and there being a particular certain set of both young and old gentlemen that belong to and near adjoining to the Chancery office, both in Chancery Lane and Bell Yard, that are not only 'whetters' all the morning long, but very musically given about twelve at night the same days, and mightily taken with the union of the dulcimer, violin, and song; at which recreation they rejoice together with perfect harmony, however their clients disagree: you are humbly desired by several gentlemen to give some regulation concerning them; in which you will contribute to the repose of us, who are
"Your very humble Servants, "L. T., N. F., T. W."
These "whetters" are a people I have considered with much pains, and find them to differ from a sect I have heretofore spoken of, called "snuff-takers,"[134] only in the expedition they take in destroying their brains: the "whetter" is obliged to refresh himself every moment with a liquor, as the "snuff-taker" with a powder. As for their harmony in the evening, I have nothing to object, provided they remove to Wapping or the Bridge-Foot,[135] where it is not to be supposed that their vociferations will annoy the studious, the busy, or the contemplative. I once had lodgings in Gray's Inn, where we had two hard students, who learned to play upon the hautboy; and I had a couple of chamber fellows over my head not less diligent in the practice of backsword and single-rapier. I remember these gentlemen were assigned by the benchers the two houses at the end of the Terrace Walk, as the only places fit for their meditations. Such students as will let none improve but themselves, ought indeed to have their proper distances from societies.
The gentlemen of loud mirth above mentioned I take to be, in the quality of their crime, the same as eavesdroppers; for they who will be in your company whether you will or no, are to as great a degree offenders, as they who hearken to what passes without being of your company at all. The ancient punishment for the latter, when I first came to this town, was the blanket, which I humbly conceive may be as justly applied to him that bawls, as to him that listens. It is therefore provided for the future, that (except in the Long Vacation) no retainers to the law, with dulcimer, violin, or any other instrument, in any tavern within a furlong of an inn of court, shall sing any tune, or pretended tune whatsoever, upon pain of the blanket, to be administered according to the discretion of all such peaceable people as shall be within the annoyance. And it is further directed, that all clerks who shall offend in this kind shall forfeit their indentures, and be turned over as assistants to the clerks of parishes within the bills of mortality, who are hereby empowered to demand them accordingly.
I am not to omit the receipt of the following letter, with a nightcap, from my valentine;[136] which nightcap I find was finished in the year 1588, and is too finely wrought to be of any modern stitching. Its antiquity will better appear by my valentine's own words:
"Sir,
"Since you are pleased to accept of so mean a present as a nightcap from your valentine, I have sent you one, which I do assure you has been very much esteemed of in our family; for my great-grandmother's daughter who worked it, was maid of honour to Queen Elizabeth, and had the misfortune to lose her life by pricking her finger in the making of it, of which she bled to death, as her tomb now at Westminster will show: for which reason, myself, nor none of my family, have loved work ever since; otherwise you should have had one as you desired, made by the hands of,
"Sir, "Your affectionate "Valentine."
"To the Right Worshipful Isaac Bickerstaff, Esq., Censor of Great Britain, and Governor of the Hospital erected, or to be erected, in Moorfields.
"The petition of the inhabitants of the parish of Goatham in the county of Middlesex;
"Humbly Sheweth,
"That whereas 'tis the undoubted right of your said petitioners to repair on every Lord's Day to a chapel of ease in the said parish, there to be instructed in their duties in the known or vulgar tongue; yet so it is (may it please your Worship) that the preacher of the said chapel has of late given himself wholly up to matters of controversy, in no wise tending to the edification of your said petitioners; and in handling (as he calls it) the same, has used divers hard and crabbed words; such as, among many others, are 'orthodox' and 'heterodox,' which are in no sort understood by your said petitioners; and it is with grief of heart that your petitioners beg leave to represent to you, that in mentioning the aforesaid words or names (the latter of which, as we have reason to believe, is his deadly enemy), he will fall into ravings and foamings, ill-becoming the meekness of his office, and tending to give offence and scandal to all good people.
"Your petitioners further say, that they are ready to prove the aforesaid allegations; and therefore humbly hope, that from a true sense of their condition, you will please to receive the said preacher into the hospital, until he shall recover a right use of his senses.
"And your petitioners," &c.