The Illiterate Digest
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Table of contents
1. Front matter2. TWO LETTERS AND A DEDICATION3. ILLUSTRATIONS4. INTRODUCTION5. BREAKING INTO THE WRITING GAME6. BREAKING INTO THE WRITING GAME7. SETTLING THE CORSET PROBLEM OF THIS COUNTRY8. SETTLING THE CORSET PROBLEM OF THIS COUNTRY9. HOW TO TELL A BUTLER, AND OTHER ETIQUETTE10. HOW TO TELL A BUTLER, AND OTHER ETIQUETTE11. DEFENDING MY SOUP PLATE POSITION12. DEFENDING MY SOUP PLATE POSITION13. HELPING THE GIRLS WITH THEIR INCOME TAXES14. THE GREATEST DOCUMENT IN AMERICAN LITERATURE15. THE GREATEST DOCUMENT IN AMERICAN LITERATURE16. PROSPECTUS FOR “THE REMODELED CHEWING GUM CORPORATION”17. PROSPECTUS FOR “THE REMODELED CHEWING GUM CORPORATION”18. INSIDE STUFF ON THE TOTAL ECLIPSE19. INSIDE STUFF ON THE TOTAL ECLIPSE20. IT’S TIME SOMEBODY SAID A WORD FOR CALIFORNIA21. IT’S TIME SOMEBODY SAID A WORD FOR CALIFORNIA22. PROMOTING THE OCEANLESS ONE PIECE SUIT23. PROMOTING THE OCEANLESS ONE PIECE SUIT24. WARNING TO JOKERS: LAY OFF THE PRINCE25. WARNING TO JOKERS: LAY OFF THE PRINCE26. SPRING IS HERE, WITH POEMS AND BATH TUBS27. SPRING IS HERE, WITH POEMS AND BATH TUBS28. MR. FORD AND OTHER POLITICAL SELF-STARTERS29. WILSON COULD LAUGH AT A JOKE ON HIMSELF30. WILSON COULD LAUGH AT A JOKE ON HIMSELF31. A JOB WITH THE JAMES FAMILY32. A JOB WITH THE JAMES FAMILY33. LET’S TREAT OUR PRESIDENTS LIKE HUMAN BEINGS34. WHAT WITH FRUIT JUICE AND CONSOMME, IT WAS A WILD PARTY35. WHAT WITH FRUIT JUICE AND CONSOMME, IT WAS A WILD PARTY36. WHAT WE NEED IS MORE FRED STONES37. WHAT WE NEED IS MORE FRED STONES38. ONE OIL LAWYER PER BARREL39. ONE OIL LAWYER PER BARREL40. ANOTHER HOT CONFESSION IN THE OIL SCANDAL41. ANOTHER HOT CONFESSION IN THE OIL SCANDAL42. THE WHOLE TRUTH AND NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH43. WELL, WHO IS PRUNES?44. WELL, WHO IS PRUNES?45. POLITICS GETTING READY TO JELL46. TWO LONG LOST FRIENDS FOUND AT LAST47. TWO LONG LOST FRIENDS FOUND AT LAST48. THEY NOMINATED EVERYBODY BUT THE FOUR HORSEMEN49. THEY NOMINATED EVERYBODY BUT THE FOUR HORSEMEN50. IN THE MIDST OF A 7 YEAR HITCH51. IN THE MIDST OF A 7 YEAR HITCH52. “WILL ROGERS JR.” REPORTS THE CONVENTION FOR HIS FATHER, WORN OUT BY LONG SERVICE53. “WILL ROGERS JR.” REPORTS THE CONVENTION FOR HIS FATHER, WORN OUT BY LONG SERVICE54. ROPING A CRITIC55. “THE WORLD TOMORROW,” AFTER THE MANNER OF GREAT JOURNALISTS.[B]56. SETTLING THE AFFAIRS OF THE WORLD IN MY OWN WAY57. SETTLING THE AFFAIRS OF THE WORLD IN MY OWN WAY58. A SKINNY DAKOTA KID WHO MADE GOOD59. TAKING THE CURE, BY THE SHORES OF CAT CREEK60. TAKING THE CURE, BY THE SHORES OF CAT CREEK