Volume 2 / Part 6 — HISTORY OF JOHN CHEAP THE CHAPMAN.
Reading edition
[A Falkirk edition of this chap-book, printed by T. Johnston in 1798, has been used here. The full title is—‘The History of John Cheap the Chapman: containing above a Hundred Merry Exploits done by him and his fellow Traveller, Drowthy Tam, a sticked Shaver. In three parts.’ It has been usual to suspect that the work is autobiographical to some extent.]
THE HISTORY OF JOHN CHEAP THE CHAPMAN.
Preface.
John Cheap the chapman, was a very comical short thick fellow, with a broad face and a long nose; both lame and lazy, and something leacherous among the lasses: he chused rather to sit idle than work at any time, as he was a hater of hard labour. No man needed to offer him cheese and bread after he curst he would not have it; for he would blush at bread and milk, when hungry, as a beggar doth at a babee. He got the name of John Cheap the chapman, by his selling 20 needles for a penny, and twa leather laces for a farthing. He swore no oaths but one, which was, Let me never sin.
He used no imprecations, But let me never cheat nor be cheated, but rather cheat, &c.
He gave bad counsel to none but children, to burn the bonecombs, that their mother might buy another when he came again.
He never fought with any but dogs,[71] and the good wives daughters in their daffing, and that’s not dangerous.