LINES WROTE AFTER SEEIN’ SHAKESPEARE’S HAMLET FROM AN UPPER GALLERY

O Shakespeare! Thou whom’st all the world dost think Hast written some good things, I, too, wouldst pay My best respects to thee; yet, wouldst I say That whilst I like thee yet I dost not shrink From tellin’ thee that thou art on the “blink” And very sadly out of date to-day. Still, if thou’lt follow my advice thou may Still count as one of us, and get more “chink.” Your plays ain’t any good the way they stand: Thou ought’st to tone them up with something nice: Some coon-songs, fire-engines, blood-hounds and A swingin’ bridge and chunks of floatin’ ice Wouldst make your old plays draw to beat the band, And folks wouldst crowd your show at any price!