JOHN NEWMAN, Assoc. M. Inst. C.E., (continued 2)

"Unless always well buried and at such a depth that neither the moistness nor condition of the earth vary, I scarcely believe in timber pile foundations at all, except in very peculiar cases, and as a kind of aid to the main support or to help to prevent the toe of a wall from being thrust forward, but for cofferdams, jetties, piers, and such structures, of course they are useful. In hard and most gravelly soil avoid them, and also in sharp sand, if you cannot use the previously-mentioned water-pipe arrangement fore and aft; and although in ordinary clays they drive nicely, and you make a bigger profit than in sand, it puzzles me to discern what is the use of them for permanent foundations, except to help to prevent a wall sliding forward, because when a pile is driven into most clays the clay becomes tempered and softer, and a layer of concrete put in a proper distance down is better and much more certain, and distributes the load more equally. Elastic soil is bad in which to drive piles, for it yields and then rebounds. A pile will sometimes spring back almost as much as it is driven, and in such a case it is well to let the ram or monkey rest on the pile immediately after the blow is given, if you are hand-driving, or have an arrangement so that it is weighted directly each blow is delivered, and perhaps the best way is to hang heavy weights on the pile. In driving in firm sand the ground at the surface becomes considerably displaced, in clay about half as much as in sand.

"Pile-driving is different to masonry, and I always read the specification for pile work, and then judge whether and how a bit 'extra' is to be obtained, and guess as to the knowledge of those I have to deal with, and act accordingly. Sometimes a specification simply says all the piles are to be driven to the same depth or as shown on the drawings. That may be right should the ground have been tested by experimental driving, or the nature of it be known; but if not, I don't take much notice of the specification, because I hate waste, and can't afford the luxury; and it stands to reason that simply because a lot of piles are driven to the same depth they are not equally firm, nor will they support the same load unless the soil is exactly the same, and they drive well and regularly to the same depth and all nearly alike inches by inches, and this seldom occurs. Often 'extra' profit is to be had, as you will soon hear described, for when piles will not drive further than half or a quarter of an inch a blow they satisfy me they are tight enough for the purpose intended if they are at a fair depth and not wedged by boulders; but between ourselves, should a building of any kind have to be erected on piles, and anyone I really cared about had to live in it, I should always weight the piles for as long a time as possible after finishing the driving and reasonably more than the permanent load, watch the effects, and act accordingly, particularly in elastic soil.

"Remember a pile sinks less after it has rested than if it be driven continuously, therefore always take note of the set when the driving is proceeding, and not just at the start, or after an interval, although one does that for one's own benefit, and with a view to 'extras'; and no one wants to drive a pile an inch more than can be helped‌—‌at least I don't, nor have I, and it is certain never shall.

"You want to know when to stop driving. The time has arrived when a pile penetrates very little, and nearly equal for several successive blows of the heaviest ram by which it has been driven at the usual fall.

"A word as to tie and sheet piles before referring to the way I have worked piles for 'extra' profit. It is difficult to make a main pile and a tie act together, one or the other is nearly sure to have to bear more than its proper strain, and the tie rod becomes eaten by rust, bent, and loose in the piles. In taking down old banks and quays you will generally find the main pile and the tie pile are not held tightly by the tie rod, the tie pile is loose or pulled over, perhaps when first strained, and then becomes disengaged when the main pile has set to the strain. The tie rods want to be very carefully and frequently adjusted, if possible, and big washers and cleats on them are required. They hold best in firm sand, not so well in clay, and in large light loose soil, such as ashes, they are not much good. It is an impotent arrangement and it is always uncertain whether they will act together. Don't undertake to tighten up the rods. Fix the piles, and let the engineer see to the tightening up, as you may injure the piles.

"When I have to drive a lot of sheet piles, of course the piles are supplied to me, and I only take the driving. You may be sure the timber is right, and that the edges are sawn square so as to drive tightly together, and that the point is in order. I find it always pays well to temporarily place a baulk at the ground line like a waling, but not fixed to the sheet piling, as it guides the piles, lessens the shaking, and they drive easier and better. It appears to me piles cannot vibrate without force, and that is not where it is wanted, so it is wasted motion. Agitation when drawing piles is all right, but when you are driving you want it in the ground itself, and not in the piles. Once when I had to drive some thin sheet piles, I made a movable guide frame, the side against the sheet piling being planed and greased. It was like one bay of a timber-lattice bridge, and it well paid for itself as it steadied the piles.

"In taking a contract for drawing piles always find out how long the piles have been driven, for if they have been down many years they will be much harder to draw than if they have only been fixed a few months. They can be drawn by lever, hydraulic jack, and chains, and pontoons in a tide way."

CHAPTER VI.

TIMBER PILES.

Manipulation for "Extra" Profit.

"Now, I'll tell you about a bit of 'extra' dodging that rather scared me. First, let me say, no one can ever know how much I hate waste‌—‌it can't be measured."

"You and me are alike, a couple of turtle doves on that question."

"We are. Finish up, and we will have another. I remember Lord Palmerston said, dirt was matter out of place, or something like that. Now I think piles are often good timber out of place, so I followed that lesson and said to myself 'What a lot of good timber is going to be buried; and really it is breaking and loosening the ground too much to please me, and that's a mistake, besides placing extra weight on it'; so after dwelling on the subject as much as suited me, I decided it was waste, and that it was poison to me. I had trouble on my mind about it and it made me feel thirsty and does now. Pour another out."

"There you are."

"I'm better now. Well, I wrestled over the waste question some time, and finally made up my mind not to be a party to it, it being against my principles, and, like us all, no man shall make me swerve from them, especially when they agree with my pocket."

"Certainly; shake hands. That is good!"

"Well, there was only one way to do it, so in order that every one might have their way to a certain extent I decided to drive first one pile to the depth as ordered and one to the depth that suited me, and therefore both parties were satisfied and believed they had got what they wanted; for while I left the other man, that is the engineer‌—‌excuse the disrespect‌—‌to his happy thoughts, I descended to simple practice in a way very comforting to me. Knowing it is not every pile which is driven that drives whole, or is according to drawing, many often being twisted and knocked to shreds‌—‌although I have seen them driven through a layer of old brickwork, and whole, too‌—‌and that there is a lot of uncertainty about them in some ground, I dwelt on the matter, and came to the conclusion that according to the drawings every other pile would be driven about 3 to 4 feet too far down, and that all concerned hardly agreed upon the depth to which all of them should be driven, and that I was the chief one to be considered; so I cut off a few feet of the top of nearly every other pile, and varied the length according to whether the pile happened to drive hardly or went down gently."

"Precisely."

"Somehow or other the ground seemed really grateful to me, for more of the piles were cut off than I originally intended. They must have passed the tip‌—‌may be the worms did it; anyhow the ground, after a few had been driven, seemed to become harder, and we had more sawing to do than ever. I like sawing. You see your work, and all is above board and nothing hidden and no deception. Suits our principles. Now, you are like me, you don't wish to disturb other people's minds, we are built on the lines of love too much, and tenderness is better than anger any day."

"That's it. I consider you were doing a kindness all round, or as near to it as makes no difference!"

"Well, in order not to disturb any one, it took some thinking over as to the best time to ease off the tops. I mean cut the heads off and put the rings on again, and give the tops a properly seasoned appearance. I used to call it put their hair right. Now, you know docks are not like railway works, for the men are nearly all at one place; here we were in the middle of a large town, but you'll excuse my naming the place, I am too polite to do such a thing without permission. No one was about at dinner time, for all the chaps passed the gates. The place where my work was was shut in nicely, and as there was always a row going on from the traffic close by on road and river, and loading and unloading, it was a really nice little home in which to do a bit of engineering-up-to-date."

"I understand; a convenient spot for scientific experiments in saving labour and the waste of good material."

"That's the lesson. I found dinner time was the best after a week's scouting, and that the road was clear as daylight, for all the spies were away, and there was only one that ever hung about, and he was a young engineer just come to the docks straight from Westminster. He was a nice sort of chap, and a smart one, and had the kind of face a girl looks fond upon from what I have noticed of their tricks. Of course, he did not know much of actual work, being a new pupil, I heard. By the way, what a lot of pupils to be sure some engineers turn out. I almost fancy a few of them must make as much from the schooling branch of the profession as they do from work; but let them, it is nothing to do with me, but this pupil I can say was no fool, though, the same as all new hands, the work was a novelty to him, like a new toy to a child.

"Now, the only thing to interfere with the 'extra' business as described was this pupil, so I decided to fix his attention, if I could, in another direction, and sweetly, so thought it out, and said to myself, 'You have had more difficult things to steer through than this‌—‌rather hotter, I fancy.'

"It so happened, just then, they had pulled down an old tavern, and built on the site a showy crib with balcony overlooking the river, and they had a lot of relics on view, and two nicish girls were there. Good figures, you know, and fairly on; so I made myself particularly gracious to Mr. Pupil and pointed out, submissive to his superior knowledge like, a few things on the work. Then the plot was let loose this way. I started a kind expression on my face, and said‌—‌

"'I'm afraid you find it rather rough, sir, here; there are not the nice feeding places they have in town, in fact, I think there is only one near here, sir, at all fit for you.'"

"'Where is that?'

"'It is the Anchor and Hope Hotel, sir. I can hardly direct you to it; but you have plenty of time to go there and get back fully a quarter of an hour before the men's dinner time is over, if you will allow me to show you the place, and they have almost a museum of relics of the river.'

"The relics settled it, and he took on all right, and I knew then things were working smoothly and the wind was getting round to a nice steady breeze from the proper quarter. He was a good-natured chap, and one could see liked inspecting the woman portion of creation better than works, at least, during dinner-time, and I don't blame him; some men are built that way, and can hardly say 'no' to a woman, for if they do they think they have done wrong and been unkind. Poor things! Well, we got to the place, and, fortunately, no one was in the private bar."

"You mean lobby. Don't insult the place."

"I humbly beg pardon.

"In we went, and it was lucky, for the better of the two girls was on parade; they were nieces of the landlord, so had more latitude than paid slaves. I went in first, and Mr. Pupil turned to me and said, 'I will be with you in a minute.' Now, that was just what I wanted, a word or two of priming for Polly. So after shaking hands with her, said:‌—‌

"'Polly, in a second or two a young swell will be here just new on the works, and will be on the job to the finish, three years, so make yourself pleasant as possible. Three years' presents and fun, to say nothing of odd trips out, are not to be snuffed at; and he is rich they tell me, and should be real good business all round, if you work him right.'

"She laughed; and before I could say any more the door was on the move, and in Mr. Pupil came. I kept my weather eye on him, for I can generally tell, when they run young, whether a chap is smitten sufficient. I saw the place would be a pleasant diversion, just seeing one of the tender gender occasionally, after being all day among men; so to make it appear I was a wolf on business, said, 'Please excuse me, sir, but I have to meet a gentleman at half-past twelve.'

"'Certainly. Do not let me detain you.'

"I just turned to Polly, and said, 'Show this gentleman your museum of relics, and the private room looking across the river, as I think it may perhaps suit him for an odd lunch now and then.' Polly twigged.

"I saw they were started on the road of mutual admiration, and travelling pretty, and that he meant calling again. She also seemed to like the prospect, and knew how to work the game of fascination right, and she did; so the only one in the way of preventing my doing a bit of engineering-up-to-date with the pile-driving was now removed in a nice harmonious way, and to the entire satisfaction of the company's resident engineer‌—‌no, hardly that, I mean mine. I consider I did a kind action to all parties, not excepting myself. What a blessing women are, if you use them right. Mr. Pupil had his lunch at the place every day, and Polly and he understood each other, and got on A 1, so I was told. It is soothing work bringing happiness to two young hearts as beat soft.

"Next day we started cutting off the pile-heads, while Polly and Mr. Pupil were occasionally very likely pitching their heads together so that I should not have all the fun. Well, we managed to so drive the piles after a day or two as to be able to cut off, generally during dinner time, from 2 to 4 feet, and I should think must have done over 200, when one day, just as we had nearly sawn one through, up turned Mr. Pupil. Polly and her sister were visiting, and never told me they were going, so the Anchor and Hope did not weigh-in much from him that day. My ganger, who was doing the sawing trick with me, looked a bit down, but he is not so educated as me; so I turned to Mr. Pupil and said‌—‌as he asked me what I was doing, and what was the matter‌—‌'Got the pile down wrong, sir, and shall have to lift it. I think it's broken off, or gone ragged, may be it has struck an old anchor.'

"He just looked very hard at me, nodded, and went away. It was a close shave, and lucky it was not the chief engineer. However, we had a quarter of an hour to work on that pile before the men came back, and we soon ruined it with bars and tackle. Anyhow, we raised it in no time, for we had the best tackle and everything you could wish for. We split the pile right across. It was only down 5 feet, and most of it in mud. We quickly cut it up into cleats; and out of misfortunes, between you and me, I always make as much as I can. So when Mr. Pupil returned I said to him, 'It wants a lot of experience to know when piles are not driving right, but 25 years has not been lost on me, sir, and I will have good work or none.' Perhaps 'none' would have been the correct word; but anyhow I used it coupled, and you can't complain, for if the pile had been cut there would have been none in the place where it was thought there was. We saved a lot of driving, and I said to myself, 'It is lucky this bit of wharf wall is left to me pretty well, because, as nearly most of the piles are a bit short, the wall may settle if they load it much or build on it; still I think it will settle equally, and then it won't matter so much, and they are not going to build on or near it, that I know,' so I saved nearly 1000 feet of driving on the lot; but here comes the shake. I forgot to say the piles were driven, and a platform fixed on the top for the wall in the old style, but it has gone out now, since Portland cement concrete came into fashion. One day the engineer walked over the work with two or three directors, and, after a lot of talk, they decided to build some 3-floor warehouses upon the quay, after some figuring and dwelling on it. That made me think. I heard someone say, 'The piles are 15 feet in the solid ground, and therefore will safely bear the load.' So they would if they had been, but not many hundreds of them were, and many were in 5 feet of little better than mud, and as some had been cut off 4 feet, those piles were only 6 feet in the solid ground. Understand, this wharf piling was only the beginning of a long two or three years profit for me, and I knew the warehouses would be sure to settle, and if they did unequally, over would go the show. I always avoided the quay wall afterwards; it seemed like a sort of spectre to me.

"One day the engineer sent for me to come to the office. Of course I was there sharp. He said:‌—‌

"'I want you to tell me your idea of the character of the ground upon which the western quay wall is erected?'

"Don't you think I was lucky, old pal? Here was my deliverance. It was not exactly a path of roses‌—‌there are not many knocking about now‌—‌because if I said it was soft ground he could reply, 'You had a very high price for such driving.' If I said it was firm, I felt sure, should they build a warehouse on it such as I heard them talk about, it would sink or topple over, so I had to be careful how the ship was sailed. I answered the engineer like this: 'If you'll excuse me talking to you freely, sir, I will speak my mind; but I most feel abashed with such as you, for you know a thousand times better than me.' He then said to me:‌—‌

"'Be at your ease. I wish to hear exactly what you would do in the matter if you were in my position. I have made up my mind; in fact, I have already committed my views to writing.'

"'Thank you, sir. Well, sir, I think it is a risky place, although the piles were many of them dreadfully hard to drive, and wanted a lot of care and all had it, I think, judging from the variation in the depth to which they went down under the same number of blows, that the ground is a bit mixed, and therefore I should choose another site, as there is plenty of room.'

"'Your opinion somewhat coincides with mine. Your idea, I may say, is one which the configuration of the ground leads me to think is the case without doubt. It is therefore probable that in a few days I may have a considerable length of the quay loaded with rails, nearly 2000 tons will arrive for the main and branch lines before the end of the week, as I intend to load part of the quay with about 8 tons per square foot in order to test it. In any case, much as I am urged to commence the warehouses at once, I shall not do so until the quay has withstood the test during at least a month.'

"'That is a heavy test, sir.'

"'You can go now!' He bowed, and smiled his thanks, and I withdrew. Of course, I said nothing to anyone. It don't do to annoy the guv'nor. Well, in a few days the rails came, about 2500 tons of them. The engineer sent for me again and said, 'I wish you to see the rails stacked on part of the quay in accordance with instructions you will receive.'

"I could only say, 'Very well, sir,' and withdraw. I felt I was had again, and went straight away and had a pull of rum. There was no help for it now. I was in the fix and had to get out of it somehow, and what made it doubly worse was being ordered to superintend my own ruin. Listen, for you will when I tell you I might have been tried for having killed or injured 400 men and one director! It was a near squeak for the lot, and as it was‌—‌No! I'll tell you in a few minutes what happened.

"Well, we stacked the rails over the place according to the engineer's directions, after Mr. Pupil had taken the levels‌—‌he also took them every day, to see how things were going. I made no remarks, for fear I might say something that would lead to further enquiries, and took the cue from a chap I once knew, the biggest rogue out he was; he could please them pretty, and never had any fixed opinions about anything, like some of our politicians, or could twist them about to suit the times; and he set his sails according to circumstances, so as to be pleasant to everyone, and was liked and respected by a lot that knew no better and could not see through him, but he had not a bit of honesty in him. Fact was, knowing I had got all I could out of short driving and cutting off these piles, I played a mild game of respectful bluff, more particularly as Mr. Pupil told me the ground had only gone down a mere decimal of an inch.

"One day the engineer walked over by himself and said to me, 'Come to the quay wall.'

"We got there, and I felt I had soft sawder enough in me for anything. He led off by saying, 'Although this is a severe test it is not altogether satisfactory to me. The rails shall remain in their present position for at least another month. I have known, as in cylinder sinking, subsidence to occur very suddenly and unexpectedly. I do not like the system of foundations upon piles, but have been overruled here.'

"Now what he said pleased me much, because I thought to myself if the wall does break up it will not be exactly a heart-breaking trial to him. Well, all went on as usual for a fortnight, and I heard nothing further till one Friday about 5 o'clock. It was near low water, and Mr. Pupil came to me and said the engineer wanted to see me. I went towards the office, but on the way met him and the engineer and three or four other swells, two of them that came before. I touched my hat, and walked behind. I heard the engineer say, 'Mr. Selectus, although the position is very good, I am not satisfied with regard to the foundations, more especially as I believe the ground to be varied in character; and on an old plan, dated 1720, I note a stream marked here; in fact, Mr. Pupil has searched and found a water-course existed almost from the earliest known times.'

"If he did not say exactly that, it was just like it, anyhow he spoke up pretty straight. One of the directors (I heard they were all such afterwards) said, addressing the engineer, 'I have an idea. The men will cease work, I think, very soon?' 'They will,' said the engineer. 'Have you any objection to their marching and marking time, as it were, upon the rails, as a final test, as I remember we so tested a suspension bridge I had erected at my place?'

"The engineer assented, and remarked that although the weight of 500 men was not much compared to the weight of the rails, the vibration they would create might cause a sudden subsidence. However, he slightly bowed to the director, and said, 'I leave the experiment entirely to you, although I may say it is not unattended with risk; for the test load now imposed is a very severe one for such unstable soil, and the effects of vibratory motion are usually most deleterious.'

"However, the director, after some talking, had his way, so the men were fetched. We had about 700 at work then, the company's own men. I will cut it short. Well, the director told the foreman, as the engineer asked him to do so, what he wished to be done, and the men marched up and down I should think six or seven times. It did not take long, and they soon got into step, for we had a lot of militia chaps at work; and then the director, who seemed to be enjoying himself, said, 'Now we will try three trips, double quick,' so the men went by once all on the smile, and we were as near laughing as smiling allows, when!‌—‌‌—‌

"It chokes me to think of it. Fill up the glass, so that I may keep my pipes open. Thank you, I was near being blocked up. Well, about half of the men were behind the rails, and we were all, except the director-in-command I'll call him, looking on and stationed on a mound close by. I shouted out‌—‌seemed a sort of sudden impulse‌—‌

"'Look out! the ground is settling. Run for your lives.' About half of the men heard me, and got away, but the front lot went on. I should think 200 of them. Bless you, the ground began to yaw and sink with the rails very quickly, and the wall pressed forward and toppled over in one place for about a 30-feet length with men upon the top of it, and the director as well, and fell very slowly, and quite majestically, right into the river, and there was a splash and crash. I said before it was nearly low water, and I should think there was about 5 feet on the sill and 2 feet of mud. After all, somehow or other, only about thirty men and the director were cast, and they were all taken out right, for there was plenty of assistance. Still one man had his arm broken, which was a good thing for him as it turned out, for the director made him one of his lodge-keepers; but as he was a smart-looking chap, and had been brought up right, and could not work much after, it was an even bargain."

"How about the director?"

"Ah! that's the only fun we had; for I tell you, when I saw the men and the wall go over it made me take root, and my boots were nearly pressed into the ground, and they said I went awfully white in the face. It did give me a shock; but it was lucky the break-up was so slow, for those that could not get off had time to jump and get clear of the rails, but I tell you it was a shave. As it turned out, the director had the worst ducking of the lot that fell in. He went sprawling into the mud; but he could swim, and when we saw him I nearly burst out laughing, only my feelings had been so shaken, for he was smothered in slime from head to foot, and looked like a real savage. All his hair, face, and beard were thick with mud, to say nothing of his tailoring; and I tell you he put me in mind of a baboon just then, and I don't think he will attempt any more testing.

"Of course, the warehouses were not erected upon the quay, and the engineer was not sorry at the way things had turned out. Anyhow, he let me do the clearing away the rails and the rebuilding; and I drove in the piles just the same length as the others, and nothing was said to me or suspected. It worked all right; but suppose a lot of the men had been killed, and the director as well! I tell you it was a near shave, and all before my eyes. It would just have killed me; for I should have known about another 3 feet down of those piles would have made them stand all serene. As it was, my wife said I was that disturbed in my sleep, and kicked so, that she hardly got a wink of rest, and had to double herself up in bed for fear of having her legs broken; however, it wore off in time, although once I sent myself and my old woman clean off the bedstead, and I saw by the light of the moon we were sitting on the floor, and the clothes were all of a heap close by. It made a nice picture of domestic bliss. My wife gave it me hot, and she said she would stand it no longer. I said, 'Don't grumble, you have not got to stand. You are sitting down now, and you ought to know it.' She said she heard me mumble several times in my sleep 'Cut 3 feet off her, Bill!' That was my ganger's name, and, of course, my brain was alluding to cutting off the piles; she thought it was her‌—‌no fear. Still, she always makes out I was not so good as I once was, and she felt sure Old Nick and me had night conversations. I laugh over the whole thing now. I hardly did then."

CHAPTER VII.

MASONRY BRIDGES.

"Now I'll tell you how we got on with some masonry bridges. Being more of a scholar than most of them‌—‌thanks to the parish school‌—‌and being able to read, write, and sum a bit, I knew a trifle extra to the other chaps, and was made a ganger when very young. Somehow or other, I drifted into being crafty, and just then made friends with a man that was up to every game, and remembered old George Stephenson. He could tell and teach you something, and did me; but even I have known the time when we hardly ever had a drawing to work to, except the section, and have walked many miles behind an engineer, and heard him say to my partner‌—‌who was a mason, and a real good one‌—‌'Joe, put a bridge there, the same span and width between the inside of the parapets as the others.' 'All right, sir!'

"You know that was the time of the rush for railways, and few understood the business. Too many do now, I think, and the old country is too full of mouths generally. Then there was scarcely time to think, much more for many drawings; they were made after.

"We used to take a bridge at a time, at so much the cubic yard, and we did put it in thick, abutments, counterforts, wingwalls, and parapets, and all the work was as straight as could be made; and I have known my partner, Joe, nearly drawn into tears when he was forced by circumstances over which he had no control to own an arch to a bridge was not exactly a straight line. Spirals and winders made him that waspish as I took good care to make myself particularly wanted somewhere else than at the bridge at which he was busy when he had to do them.

"Some of the bridges we built have enough masonry in them to nearly build a church or a small breakwater, and lucky they have, as it gave one the chance of a bit of profit; and the depth of the foundations was hardly so deep as shown in the drawings made after we had built a bridge. Somehow or other our imagination used to scare away reality, and we generally were paid for a foot or more extra depth all round.

"Joe said that was the way he got his professional fees for building a bridge without a drawing, and the only way he could and, moreover, did; but he always put the masonry in solid, that is to say, when he considered it should be, although hardly, perhaps, to the specification throughout, but the face looked lovely; and if the inside work was rather rough and tumble and really "random," he knew what a good bond was, and would have it, and was really clever at selecting the right rock in the cuttings for masonry; but there, no one can expect the filling-in work to be done the same way as the facework.

"Of course, it was not exactly honest to be paid for more work than we had done; but it is only fair to say we were generous with our extra profits, and always treated the inspector and our men right. We were bound to educate them and enlighten their minds. I own it was not right, and, after all, it would want an 'old parliamentary hand' to tell the difference in dishonesty between over-measurement founded on lies and stealing. However, one is supposed to be the result of cleverness, the other, crime.

"I forgot to tell you we took a cue from a director who occasionally walked over the line, and who always showed about half-an-inch of his cheque-book sticking up out of his pocket. We were told he wore his cheque-book like the mashers do their pocket-handkerchiefs; but that he was not worth much, and was on the war path for 'plunder,' and so were we, and took his tip. I said to myself, as he has brought a new fashion into play in these parts, let us take the hint.

"'So we will,' said my partner.

"'How long is the specification for masonry?

"'I am sure I don't know. What are you talking about? I never read such things. All I want to know is for what purpose the bridge is to be erected, and whether it is to be coursed work, ashlar, or the same as the others, and up it goes according to my specification. I'm above other people's specifications, thank you. What's the use of my education if I am not? Do you think the alphabet must be again taught me?'

"'I beg pardon, partner, you are right; but appearances go a long way, and shamming is fashionable.'

"'Oh, well, have your way; we all look better when we are properly clothed; and I once heard an engineer say he never felt right when on any works without a plan in his hand, and we know a music-hall singer is generally not at home without a hat; besides, it will please them to see we have the specification always on the premises.'

"'That is what I think.'

"Well, I made two copies of it, one for Joe, my partner then, and one for me, and wrote in large letters on the top, 'Specification‌—‌masonry ‌—‌bridges and culverts.' Then we both showed the top out of our pockets, with that writing on it, in the same way the director did his cheque-book. It worked beautifully; for a few days after a big engineer came down, and we heard he had said he thought we were the smartest masons on the work, and he was pleased to see we appeared careful to comply with the specification, for he noticed we each had a copy in our pockets.

"The fun was, my partner had never read it at all; I only when copying.

"The game worked really lovely; we were looked upon as downright straight ones, and the inspector‌—‌who wanted some dodging, I can tell you, as well as a tip, now and again‌—‌was taken away and posted at the other end of the work, and then we made hay while the sun shone, and no mistake. We used to make the bridges rise out of the ground; we gave some drink to our chaps; and then, as soon as the wagons with the rock arrived from the cutting, in it went. The difficulty was to keep the face going fast enough for the filling-in work. It was a game. First a wagon-load of rock, and then‌—‌well, I suppose I must say‌—‌the mortar, but it is squeezing the truth very hard indeed. There was Joe, my partner, superintending in his own style, the raking and mortar business, and I was busy at the facework looking after our best mason.

"Give my partner his due, he was always careful about bond and throughs, and he was fond of mixing up the flat stones a bit, for he said it prevented their sliding on the beds, and always maintained that the weight above kept all tight enough and more than the mortar, so long as the stones were flat and large. I said, it's lucky it did.

"One day he frightened me. We were short of stone, owing to a mistake in the cutting, and so the facework was up a good height. At last Joe caught sight of the engine and wagons coming round the hill, and said to me‌—‌

"'Hold hard, here they come, thirteen wagons; they will fill you up both sides.'

"'I agree with you; they will, and more.'

"It was then past one o'clock, and Joe called out to me‌—‌

"'Before we leave I mean to be level with you, but you must help.'

"'Joe, it can't be done.'

"'Away with your cant's; it shall be done.'

"Well, it was tempting us too much, such a lot of rock to work on all at once; if we had only had a little more than sufficient for one day's work at a time, we could not have done what we did. By Jove, he did go it. Down came the rock‌—‌I know you will kindly excuse me from calling it building stone.

"'Easy does it, Joe, or you will burst the show.'

"'Not I,' he shouted.

"Now listen to me, for this is truth. Never since the foundation of this world did bridges grow at this rate. It beats mustard-and-cress raising and high farming into fits.

"'Smash them in, lads, bar them down; give them a dose of gravel liquor. Now then, for some real cream mortar.'"

"These, and such-like, were his war-cries."

"'Bless me, if the mortar is not as thin-placed as the powder on a girl's face, Joe.'"

"'It's pretty.'

"'Now, lads, five minutes for beer.'

"All was soon comparatively silent.

"'Joe, you must draw it milder, for the row going on is more like an earthquake let loose than anything else I can think of, and it may spoil the game, for it is bound to draw a crowd.'

"'All right, partner, I never thought of that. Talk about Jack and the beanstalk, this beats it to squash. It's lucky the rock works in flat, and is not hollow. Of course, all the stones are on their natural beds, according to the specification‌—‌understand that. Don't let us have any mistake as to the catechism; if they are not, they will grow used to their new ones and shake down to rest.'

"I've never built a bridge that fell or gave much, perhaps a wingwall has bulged, but then it is the want of proper drainage and backing and nothing to do with the masonry. We only attend to the masonry according to the specification. Chorus‌—‌According to the specification. But they all do it, as the song says.

"It's my firm conviction that the man that invented wall-plates ought to have a marble monument in his native town, for they are beautiful distributors of weight, and when the stones are small, they are salvation for such masonry as we made rise."

"I agree with you, they cover a multitude of sins, and are powerful agents in the cause of unity and good behaviour."

"That is right."

"Have a sip?"

"Yes."

"I nearly got bowled out once at the masonry game. This is between ourselves."

"Of course, we understand each other; shake hands."

"They nearly caught me."

"How?"

"We were walking over the work‌—‌when I say we, I mean a party of directors, a couple of engineers, and the resident engineer. An unlucky thing happened. Someone said, 'I should think a good view of the surrounding country is to be obtained from the top of this bridge.' Now, you know, in those days, some engineers liked offsets at the back of a wall very close together, say about every two feet, as they thought the backing remained on them, and helped to prevent the wall overturning; but it seldom does, the backing is usually drawn away from such off-sets. However, unfortunately, most of these directors had only recently returned from Switzerland, and had been up the Mortarhorn, I think they said‌—‌or thought they had, or read about it in a guide book. Anyhow, they started climbing up the back of one of the abutments. They ought to have known our work is not quite so solid as nature, nor as the Romans made in the old slow days when they were not fighting; but it is all right for the purpose intended, at least, for what we intend it, and that is enough. The abutment of the bridge I am referring to was 50 feet in length, and what must they all do but start at once at the climbing business, like a lot of schoolboys eager to get there first, and I had only time to think a moment, and to shout,

"'Be careful, gentlemen, please, the mortar has not had time to set yet, it's green.'

"Lucky, I said 'yet'; but between you and me, I should be an old one, and no mistake, if I had to wait till it set right.

"They got upon the first offset all serene; but when they footed it on the third, down they came, and humpty-dumpty was not in it with the show. It was a flat procession and a general lay-out, and such a rubbing of mid-backs occurred as few have seen before. They fell soft, though, as we had partly finished backing up the bridge. I was nearly had; but I had a bit in hand with which to squeeze home at the finish, and get in the first words. They were:‌—‌

"'Gentlemen, I had no time to warn you, but the mortar has not had time to set all round, it is green; and where it has set, it is that powerful it often shifts the stones first, and then clenches them tight, and there is no parting them at all; they become gripped together just as by nature in the quarry. It is wonderful material, and the best lime known, or that I have had to do with during thirty years of hard working experience."

"Of course, the directors could say nothing; they were bankers and solicitors, or such-like, nor could the engineers. It did not do to make out the masonry had not been properly executed. I thought I had got off beautifully, and the whole party were just going to start when out of the blessed wall, there and then, flew two pheasants!"

"Well, I never!"

"You wait. Yes; and before we could speak, out came a fox. I own I was nearly beaten, but one of the directors, turning to us, said, 'You appear to have a veritable Noah's ark here, and we know a pheasant is a gallinaceous bird.'

"We all laughed. He then went on to say, 'Perhaps if we wait long enough the procession will continue. This may be the ancestral home of the dodo or the mastodon. Who can say it is not?' They again laughed.

"Now, you know, there is no denying, neither a pheasant nor a fox can squeeze themselves through an ordinary-sized mortar joint. While laughing I got my mind right, and said, 'Gentlemen, I feel sure the poachers have been on the prowl here, and have disturbed the work.'

"'Yes,' said the director. The others seemed afraid to speak. There is always a cock in every farmyard, and he was in this. 'A four-legged poacher‌—‌the fox; and I am afraid, if we do not exercise due care, the board will be charged with larceny.'

"Then we all thought we ought to laugh, and did. 'Gentlemen,' I said, 'I'm sure the bridge has been tampered with, and no doubt if we keep watch we shall find the rascals.'

"Excuse me now saying 'rascals' to you, but, old chum, of course between ourselves, that is you and me, we have never done any poaching."

"Not we, certainly: at least we forget doing it if we did. A good memory is not always a blessing, or to be owned to, although it's useful."

"Shake. That's right. As we understand each other, I will now tell you how things ended. I went on to say to the gentlemen, 'I will root out this matter; and may I ask you to say nothing to anyone. My partner and myself will get to the bottom of it. Trust your old servants, gentlemen.' Then I raised my hat. That fetched them; for one turned, and said to me:‌—‌

"'I cannot send my keepers to-night, but to-morrow they shall meet you here at six. Please watch to-night.'

"He then handed to me a five-pound note. Blessed if he did not own the land for miles round and I did not know it. I beamed all over, and said I would, and looked as humble as only an old sinner can; and I was just going to forget to tell you I put that 'fiver' carefully away, to keep it from the poachers."

"I could believe that of you; I could, old chap, without your saying it."

"Well, now talk about 'all's well that ends well;' this was better than that‌—‌simply crumbs of comfort, except the awkwardness of the situation before the finish.

"I suppose you want to know all about the cause of the tumbling show."

"Yes; I am waiting to know."

"Very well, I will tell you. I had become greedy, and as there was not much more work for me on that railway, I used to make it a rule, wherever I was, and before leaving, to have a final haul in by way of a loving remembrance of a past country in which I had spent some part of my life in opening up to civilization, and the immeasurable benefits of rapid and cheap locomotion. Is that good enough?"

"Rather; it likes me much."

"Now this bridge was a beauty to draw on, so we just left a few voids here and there. Tipping the backing must have broken a bit of the wall unknown to me, or something must have given way in the night; and I suppose the birds walked in, and the fox after them, and then the abutment settled and the backing pushed it closer together. Now the birds got to a place where the fox could not reach, and there very likely they would have been, three caged-up skeletons; but the Swiss mountain climbing spoilt that fun, and pulled down the wall sufficiently to raise the curtain on the show.

"It so happened that all the engineers and residents had to go away on some land case‌—‌I like other people to go to law; and so we had three clear days to put things in order; and we did, you bet, and began almost before the break of day. I had an untarnished reputation at stake, and was on my metal. My partner and myself just about both smiled over the fun real mutual admiration."

"The engineers did not say much for we had been paid, and they knew they would get nothing out of us, and therefore proceeded on the principle that it is no use stirring dirty water, and I say, and maintain, that on the whole‌—‌not in the hole, mind you‌—‌never was more solid and firmer masonry put together than our work, although we took care to do as we liked, and relieved the foundations of some strain now and again, and improved the specification.

"I forget whether I watched for poachers that night, but I might have done for a few minutes, so as to make it all right; but as my memory is not clear on the point, I had better say I fancy I did not, but I met the keepers next night; and did a three hours watch and told them a lot, and got well rewarded. Pay me and I'll patter pretty; but no pay, no patter, is my motto. The only thing that grieved me was losing those pheasants and the fox's brush and head. That was hard luck, but there! life is full of disappointments which are hard to bear."

CHAPTER VIII.

TUNNELS.

"Have I told you of my scare in a tunnel I got some 'extra' profit out of by real scamping?"

"Not that I remember."

"Well, that was a whitener, for I was almost trapped, nearly caught, and paid out. Retributed, I think it is called, but there, I am not sufficiently educated, although you and me have had a good deal more schooling than any others on this work, which perhaps is not too much of a recommendation. Anyhow, you agree, don't you?"

"Of course I do!"

"Well, let us drink. Now we are oiled, the machinery will start again easy and soft, and continue going for some time, but don't you consider we know enough to suit us. I have watched various guv'nors I have had, and they seem to be thinking and puzzling their brains even when they are eating, and I don't think their digestion is improved by it. A peaceful mind needs no pills. It is medicine for the upper works, and exercise and good food is the right physic for the body unless you are half a corpse when born. Now, when we eat, we have a look at the goods first, and all we trouble about is to divide the vegetables, meat, and bread, and beer, so that they last the show out in their proper quantity to the finish."

"That's it, but what has that to do with the scare at the tunnel and the scamping?"

"You wait. Really you should know impatience is not polite; and to be a good listener, and look as if every word that was said to you was virgin information and pure wisdom, is the best game to play."

"That is enough, get to the tunnel scare and scamping."

"Well, why I named about my food was, my old woman was queer just then, a lying up on the cherub business, and the party that she had to look after things was no cook, few are, and I believe she was paid by some of those pill proprietors to make people ill and then pill them. Anyhow I got queer and dreadfully out of sorts, and just at the time I was a regular nigger, and had taken a length of tunnel lining, and in such ground, horrid dark yellow clay, and it smelt awfully bad. We called the tunnel the pest-hole. What with the food being wrong, and the hateful place, I did the worst bit of scamping I ever was guilty of."

"Fortunately, the engineer knew what he was about, and our profiles were nearly round, that is, the section of the tunnel was nearly circular; if they had not been, that tunnel would have been filled up by this time, and perhaps been the grave of hundreds, and it nearly was. There were eight rings in the lining, and therefore some bulk to play with. I got frightfully pesky about the job, and meant getting out of it as quickly as possible, and did. I am not the one to play about and squat, action is my motto; and I am busy if there is anything to be got, and keen on the scent."

"You are right there. You generally find a fox, and get his brush, too."

"I was roused. The brickwork was in Portland cement, and believe me, I never would have done what I did if it had been lime mortar. Must draw the line somewhere, and the easiest conscience has a limit to being trifled with. You know, tunnel work gives one chances that are not to be had in the open, and the temptation is strong. I dropped word on the quiet, 'Be careful to-night with the first two rings and then'‌—‌well, they twigged, and I had no occasion to say much. Afterwards, the material that was given them went in anyhow. But bless me, we had Portland cement, it was supplied by the company, you understand. It held almost anything together, firm as a rock. I said to my ganger, whatever material you are given, so long as it is clean, will do, and it will be just like conglomerate. The inspector was inclined to be my way of thinking, and, by a manual operation on my part, he fully agreed with me, and said he had always been of the same opinion, only other people failed to comprehend his meaning. It has been said the pen is mightier than the sword, and so it may be; but ten hours writing, and a ten hours speech full of argument, have not the same force with some inspectors as a few sovereigns judiciously placed to aid them in arriving at a proper view of a subject."

"You are right; bribes and lies are twin brothers."

"Well, it was just a scamper all round. Yes, scamper and scamping. I had some good brickies then‌—‌militia chaps, smart, and they could stay. They made the rings grow; I forget how much we got in that night, but a good length, for the bricks ran short at one end of the tunnel, and we were close up to the face at the other end. No one that I did not want to see was about. After measuring, I found we were short at least twenty yards of bricks, and only about two thousand or so left, so I said, 'Lads, if you finish the ring by five o'clock, you shall have a quid amongst you; but do it, and keep the beautiful clean face on for all you are worth.'

"I looked a bit crafty at them, and they twigged the tune to play. I took old Bond‌—‌he was my ganger‌—‌with me, and said to him, 'How are we going to do the lining?' We can't fetch bricks from the other end, and I draw the line at timber to do duty as bricks. I waited, and the 'extra' profit string of my brain worked right, and I pointed and said, 'There is a heap of broken bricks and no one knows what; well, twenty yards of that won't be noticed if you take it equally all round; put that in, and dose it with cement, and rake it well on the top of the rings, and don't forget to finish the top nicely and clean to a hair if you have not time to fill in all of it. Keep the best stuff for near the finish, and enough bricks to make a solid strip or two, and I am otherwise engaged or tired-out till four. Wake me then; I'm off for a peaceful snooze.' Well, they got it all in, and nothing was known till‌—‌I won't name it yet, it must wait."

"I suppose the bricks you took from the brick-yard were tallied, and deliveries checked with the work done in the lining?"

"Yes; but there is tallying of all sorts, and, of course, the right amount of bricks were taken from the yard early next morning, but where they went is best known to the yard foreman, the inspector of brickwork, and the dealer; but as my partnership with them is now at an end, of course my memory fails me, and I am sorry I can't give you any more information in that direction. It grieves me to keep back anything from you, and is so unlike me."

"I don't want to hurt your feelings. All right, I understand."

"Talk about varieties of concrete, why we had sardine and meat tins, all sorts and sizes and weights and ages, tiles, ashes, bones, glass, broken crockery, oyster shells, and a lot of black-beetles and such-like shining members of creation. They all did their duty to the best of their ability. What else there was I would rather not try to remember, but it was not bricks."

"Don't trouble, I can understand. We are all pushed a bit for the right goods sometimes, and have to make shift; but it is hard, very hard, to have to do it."

"Well, I found out that the bricks were not quite so many as I thought, and for a 5 feet length, about 15 feet from shaft No. 7, they had to do with one ring of brickwork, and the rest, my patent midnight conglomerate. That frightened me, and had I known it at the time, I would have stopped the show; of course I would, you know me. I always draw the line somewhere."

"Right you are; although 'somewhere' is an easy-stretching sort of place, and there is not much of a fixed abode about it; but it can generally be found on a foggy night."

"It's my belief they did not put in enough cement mortar, and carry out my orders, which indeed was very wrong of them."

"What do you mean, your orders were wrong?"

"Oh dear no, of course not, not likely‌—‌their orders were wrong, not mine. You don't follow me rightly. You understand now? Dwell on it, and I'll wait."

"Oh yes, it was stupid of me. There, I am not so young as I was, nor so quick."

"Now we are coming to the scare. Pass my glass, it makes me feel weak, it does.

"That conglomerate length stood all right, more by luck than anything else, till one night, although all the rest was sound work and done properly, for it was well looked after, and there was no chance of a slide towards extra profit; besides, the ground would not have stood unbared long, and, of course, short lengths had to be the order, and were bound to be carried out, for the clay soon got dropsy and swelled.

"Well, my guv'nor took a contract for a line about 20 miles away from the tunnel. I had some work on it, and had to go to London, it was abroad, for I was called up by him, It was a slow train, and followed an express goods. There was a signal box at each end of the tunnel, and a fair traffic, and fast trains passed. Something got wrong with a wagon of the express goods train‌—‌I never knew exactly what it was but anyhow, nothing very serious, for the permanent way was all right and so were the wheels and axles. We were stopped by hand-signal in the tunnel, and there may have been something wrong with the signals, but that does not matter for what I am going to tell you."

"Were you scared to think the train after you would telescope you?"

"No, for there was none for an hour and a half.

"Well, the carriage I was in pulled up just under the place where that patent midnight conglomerate length was put in, and I looked up and saw the old spot had bulged, and was yawning, and looked to me as wide and moving as the Straits of Dover in a S.W. gale, and a lot worse, and it seemed to be getting wider every minute, and I saw something drop. I was alone in the compartment, and it was fortunate I was for many reasons or I know they would have found me out. I knew the place. How could I forget it? It was just by the shaft. The passengers were talking to the guards, or were otherwise engaged. Presently I heard the down mail coming at a rare speed. I said to myself, 'There is not much the matter, or they would not let her go through.' She was the last passenger train down that night, and lucky she was, you will soon say. Oh! dear me, when I heard her I felt cold and hot, and my heart got to my teeth, and I believe if I had not kept my mouth shut it would have jumped out, that's true. What scared me most was not about the mail train, I knew she would be right, and would be past the spot before the ground had time to tumble in. She was going too quick, but our train, and me, right under the place, and bound to be there after the mail had shaken it to bits! That's what made me feverish.

"I said to myself, 'You are paid out in your own coin, you are.' Before I had time to think more the mail went by all serene, and I hardly dare move, but slid up on the seat just in time to see her tail lights vanish. I then looked up, and if it had been my scaffold it could not have been worse. Oh! fill my glass up, nearly neat, while I wipe my forehead. Thank you. Yes, I looked up, and saw the crack had widened and was becoming wider, and chips were falling now and again as large as hailstones! I knew it was bound to come down. I looked to my watch, another full hour had to pass before the next train was due behind us. I was just going to get out, when I heard the guard coming along on the footboard, and he said, 'Another five minutes and we are off, gentlemen.' He did not see the falling pieces, as the carriage hid them, but I did, and the engine blowing off steam prevented him hearing them. Soon he reached my carriage, and said, 'You are the only gentleman in this carriage.' He would not say anything more. I heard him repeat the same words almost as he moved along the train, 'Five minutes and we are off, gentlemen.'

"I said to myself, 'Five minutes more and I am buried and off for ever somewhere,' for I was certain in five-and-a-half the lining would burst and down everything would come and crush us to powder. I did not care to think what else or how much. I cannot describe how I felt, but drink squalls are nothing to it. I kept my watch out of my pocket, and gazed at it till I hated it. One minute passed‌—‌two‌—‌three‌—‌and then I watched the second-hand go round. What I suffered cannot be told. I looked out of the window. I heard a whistle. It did not sound like our engine, it seemed too shrill. I had no fear of a train being behind us as I knew our road was blocked. Was it a down special excursion, or a down special goods, I said, tremblingly, to myself, for I knew all the down ordinaries had gone for the night. 'If it is,' I said to myself, 'you are settled and corpsed, and have made your own grave, and it will be a rough one.' I won't say what I did then, but know it would suit a clergyman.

"Thank goodness I was wrong, the whistle was from our engine, but it had been low and now was shrill. I was so feverish that I forgot the steam was blowing off. At last we started, and I looked at my watch. It was five minutes ten seconds from when the guard spoke. I knew I was safe, but thought I would look back. I was just able to see in the glimmering, as the fire-box was open, and by the tail lamps the last carriage had well cleared the shaft when there was a horrid hollow sound like waves breaking in a long cavern, and I saw something come down like a veil across the metals. The tunnel was in, fallen in with a slow smash, and not a minute after we started!

"I don't know how long it took the train to get to the signal-box at the entrance, but we pulled up there, and the first thing I remembered was the guard saying to me, 'No one is hurt, you need not be frightened, but we have to thank God for it. Terrible shave. The tunnel has fallen in, and just where your carriage stood!'

"I said, 'Oh!' and sank back upon the seat. The guard again came to me and popped his head in and said 'You are the only passenger that knows what is up. Keep it quiet, if you please. Shouting will do no good, and I shall be much obliged to you. It's no fault of mine or the Company's. Are you ill, sir?'

"'No, but I saw the tunnel fall in.'"

"'Traffic is stopped, sir, at both ends. The wires are right as we had reply from the other end of the tunnel. I thought you must have seen it fall in, because you looked very white, and were clasping the window frame with both hands and shaking so. I was afraid you had been almost scared with fright.'

"'No, I am not ill, but I saw it fall.'"

"'Well, sir, it is no fault of mine or the Company's, although I am sorry it has frightened you a little.' He then went away and we started again."

"When he said, 'It is no fault of mine,' bless you, it near cut my vitals out, it did; for I knew it was my fault and no other person's, and that it was only by the act of Providence the mail was not smashed to bits, and us too. I made a vow there and then never to have anything more to do with tunnels, and whenever I go through one I always feel wrong and twitchy, and shut my eyes till the rattle tones down and I know we are in the open."

"How much fell in?"

"About 20 yards altogether in length. Traffic had to go round for a month, but the rest of the work was all-right, and so it really was, and I ought to know. No one found out that nearly the whole of the fallen length had been scamped, for everything was broken and mixed up, and, as luck would have it, a spring burst out there and the flow had to be led away to one entrance, and the falling-in was always put down to that, and that only; still I know the ground was a bit cracked, and underground waters have mighty force, and are best guided and not tried to be stopped, for they will come out somewhere.

"I met my guv'nor next day, and he quietly said to me, 'I have let the tunnel work on your length to an old foreman,' and then he looked clean through me. I know he thought a lot, and I'm afraid I can't play the game of bluff as good as some can, and so work 'extra' profit out of ruins. What do you think of that scare?"

"I don't want to think about it. Glad I had nothing to do with it. Dreadful! No wonder you have a wrinkle or two. What shocking hardships we all have to pass through in getting 'extra' profit, and so undeserved!"

CHAPTER IX.

CYLINDER BRIDGE PIERS.

"Deep river bridge foundations are not to be easily worked for 'extra' profit as they are generally too carefully looked after; still, even there, you get a chance occasionally, if you know how to work things. I was always on the scent for 'extras,' and once got a bit out of a cylinder bridge, more by luck than anything else."

"How did you do it?"

"Listen, and then you'll know."

"The bed of the river was soft for a depth of nearly 50 feet, then firm watertight ground, and into that we had to go about 15 feet. Our cylinders were 15 feet in diameter, of cast-iron, and in one piece 6 feet in height I will just name that there is more chance of a bit 'extra' profit when the rings are little in height than if they are in pieces and have vertical joints and are about 9 feet long as usual. A 15 feet ring, 6 feet in length in one piece was not often seen then, but they are now cast much heavier; still, they may be made too large to handle nicely without special tackle, and foundry cleverness should be considered less than ease in fixing on the site."

"Why are short lengths best for 'extra' profit?"

"Because you may have a chance of leaving out a ring if the coast is clear, and nice people around you."

"I see."

"Well, the Company's foreman had to lay up for three days, for he had ricked himself, and I had an old pal with me, and two of my nephews working the crane, and other relations about. All had been properly schooled, and knew crumbs of comfort were to be got out of a bit 'extra,' so I embraced the opportunity as we were such a charming family party, quite a happy farmyard.

"The rings went down rather easily as the bed of the river was soft; in fact, they sunk into the mud for the first 6 to 10 feet by their own weight. So I gave the office, and we just dropped a 6 feet ring over the side into the mud, for I knew it would sink all right, and that by the time the Company's foreman returned to work we should have pumped out the water from the cylinder and got enough concrete in to seal the bottom; of course, after the resident engineer had gone down to see the foundation was right, and I felt sure it would be, and that he would only look at the foundation, and not bother about the height of the cylinder or the number of rings; and if he did, we could dodge him a bit, as there would be four or five of us, and stages were fixed on the horizontal ring-flanges, and no numbers were cast on the rings, as they all were made to fit together. He went down, just as I thought, to see the foundation only, although he measured about a bit, and enjoyed himself. We worked the tape right‌—‌it takes two with a tape. By-the-bye, I hate measuring-rods, they are not good business for 'extras.' They are so unobliging. A tape you can pull a bit, and tuck under, according as you want a thing to appear to be of a different length to what it is. One of my gangers made a false end for a tape. He used to turn the end of the true tape under for a few inches and slip on his false end, or he added a false length if he wanted. He took good care to hold the end, and he could slip it on and off like a flash of lightning, and good enough for a conjurer. He could lengthen or shorten a tape a few inches at will; all he wanted was to hold the ring at the end. His false end was a bit of a real tape with his attachment, and I have seen him trick them really pretty.

"Considering we had about sixteen rings altogether, top to bottom; there was a good length on which to dodge, but our game would have been too risky I fancy with eight or ten rings, and in a strong light, because one could count the flanges pretty easily; but it is not many that suspect a ring may be omitted.

"We were some 8 feet in the hard soil, and I considered that enough, for the ground did not help much to keep the cylinders in place for 50 feet of the height above it, but they were well braced above high water and at top. When I consider a thing enough, you don't catch me let them have much more if I can help it. I hate waste.

"The foundations were declared to be all right, and so they were, and we at once began the hearting, and sealed up the bottom after cleaning up, and we put in good Portland cement concrete, for all the materials were supplied to us.

"Of course, the Company's foreman, when he came back, could not tell, nor could anyone else, that we had been having a happy time; but give him his due, he did all he knew to find the rings were in. You know the ring we got rid of for 'extras' we took care should be sunk in the middle, between the two columns, and well away from each one. The bridge was wide,‌—‌about four lines of rails on top‌—‌so we slung the ring out very quickly, after the men had gone for the day, just about midway between the cylinders, and down it went pretty quickly, and it was bound to be in the mud fully 8 feet by the morning, and sure to sink a bit more, for I had it dropped sharp, and I thought it would be certain to break up where it fell. We worked it so nicely, and all was as lovely and serene and merry as a marriage, and real crumbs of comfort, and I thought no more about it.

"We sank the ring purposely midway between the other two cylinders, so that if the bridge had to be widened it would not be found. But we were had for once, and no mistake this time, and all our own fault, and just where we thought we had been clever, for one day the engineer came down and sniffed about. I wish he had stopped at home instead of coming bothering; however, he did not, but came. The result was the resident engineer handed to me a tracing with a new cylinder marked on in the middle of a line drawn through the centre of the two cylinders, and just where I had sunk the 6 feet length I thought I had got a bit 'extra' out of so sweet, and I might have just as well sunk it outside. Well, I took two pills that night to brace me up and set my machinery in perfect trim; and no one can know what I suffered, for I meant getting out of the fix somehow or other, but could not see my road much ahead.

"You know I was certain we were bound to find that 'extra' ring. If we could have broken it up, or have been sure it was broken, there might have been no harm; but we did not know exactly where it was, and if we did we could not raise it. I felt certain we should come to it, and tried the crane to see if we could fix the spot, but we had to chance it. It was no use humbugging ourselves into thinking we knew where it was, when no one could possibly know. As I said before, I was positive we should meet it in sinking the cylinder, and as the ground was soft for some distance that it would tilt the centre rings‌—‌and then the game I had played would be found out, for cast-iron is hardly as soft as mud.

"I felt my reputation was at stake‌—‌in fact, all my noble past‌—‌and all for a 15 feet cast-iron cylinder, 6 feet in height, and 1¼ inch in thickness! I thought of blowing up the surface before the men were at work, and doing a bit of subaqueous mining; but it was too risky and desperate, so I saved myself for the final round, that is, I waited with my teeth set till I met that sunken 'extra' ring, and meant getting clear and settling it in one round, you bet, for I considered the situation very degrading, not to say insulting.

"We quickly erected the staging, and I tried all I knew to get the foreman away and the resident engineer. Still I dare not play the same tune too much, or they would suspect, but they were too 'fly' to be drawn off. I arranged with my nephews at the crane to give me the office, if I was not on the spot, by sharply twice turning on the blow-off cock.

"I happened to be on the top of a column on the next land-pier with the resident engineer who had called me, and the foreman was there also, when I heard the two puffs. I pretended to take no notice, nor did he or the foreman, and I managed to govern myself and keep myself quiet, just like the old nobility do, and think a lot.

"Before I left the resident engineer I found he was going at once to some meeting, and I just wished he would take the foreman with him, if only out of the love I had for him and give him a holiday; however, I got to know on the quiet he had to superintend some unloading at a wharf half a mile or more away, so the road was pretty clear. Directly I got to the cylinder I knew what was up, for it had tilted.

"We could not pump out the water, and divers could not go down unless the bottom was sealed, because of the almost liquid mud at the depth we had reached, but in another 8 or 10 feet it could have been done. I thought for an instant and then gave the word. 'Weight her down, lads, get some more kentledge and then we will pull her straight. It's only a piece of a wreck, or a bit of timber or stone.'

"I forget whether I told you that it was only my family party that knew of the 'extra' ring being sunk, the rest of my men did not. My game was to wreck the cylinder if I could, and tilt it over so that it would fall, and then fetch the foreman when I knew it would go. If I could manage that I felt I was right. Anyhow I was bound to smash up the bottom ring, at least, I thought so then. Cutting out the obstruction I was thankful could not be done, nor drawing it in, nor splitting it up inside the cylinder. That was certain. I did not much care to tackle lifting the rings. I wanted to smash them. Compressed air I did not want to hear of, for that would have bowled me clean out, and shown the whole game. I wanted to try to thrust the cylinder through the obstruction, although, of course, I was not supposed to know what it was, as that usually fails and ends in smash more or less, and I was certain it would in this case, for it was cast-iron against cast-iron on an earth bed. Attempting to thrust a cylinder ring through anything and everything is always a dangerous operation, and one to be avoided.

"Now they knew exactly how many cylinder rings had been delivered by the manufacturers, and if they had found the one we played 'extras' with, they could soon see it was the same size and make, and could easily tell how many were on the work and in the piers. I beg pardon, I should have said, supposed to have been in, and it was 1000 to 1 all would not be well.

"It occurred in the summer, and the foreman came and sent a telegram to the resident engineer, and before he arrived we had weighted the side that was up and endeavoured to get it straight by hauling, but it was no good; at least I think I tried to get it vertical, but I may also have tried to smash it. I expected, and was afraid, they would lift it by pontoons the next tide.

"Well, the resident engineer came. He tried a few figures over, and said to the foreman, 'If we do not mind, it will cost more trying to right it than it will to lift the lot.'

"Anyhow we got more power and more weights. He had the soil loosened on the upper side of the ring; but, of course, as it was iron at the bottom, it did not do much good; and we tried pretty well every dodge in turn that is known, but I need hardly say with very little effect.

"The resident engineer said, 'Compressed air will be too expensive for this one cylinder, but I think we can sufficiently clear the interior by a force pump and dredger for a diver to go down.' Now the chief engineer was abroad for a fortnight, so we left it alone that night; but I tried all I knew, bar hammering, for that I dare not do, to smash the rings and they would not break, the soil was too soft and even. I was certain I could pull them over, but then they would most likely lift the rings and might find out the cause of the bother.

"However, I let everything rest, and trusted to luck. The resident engineer decided to have the cylinder raised, as we had two large pontoons handy, so the top rings were removed to as low a depth above water as possible, and chains were fixed round the rings and also to bolts in the flanges, and in two tides all the rings were pulled up."

"'So you got out of the trouble all right?"

"You wait, don't be too sure. The resident engineer and the foreman were pacing up and down just as we were lifting the cutting ring, and we did that by the crane. They were at the other end of the staging though. The cutting edge was within a few inches of the water-level when I saw that a bit of the ring I had sunk for 'extras' was actually jammed into and hanging to the cutting ring."

"Oh! save my nerves, that was bad."

"Well, I had the crane stopped in a second, for my nephew was watching like a vulture, and I and my ganger had provided ourselves with a bar each, and were standing on the flanges. The cutting ring was only 3 feet 6 inches in height, and after two smashing taps it dropped, neither the foreman nor the resident engineer saw the fun closely; but as the resident asked us what we had been barring at, I said 'A small bit of a wreck got wedged on, sir, and would have stuck between the pontoons, and I am very sorry we could not land it to show you."

"That's good enough old pal. Pass on, please."

"I thought you would laugh. Well, the pontoon had been brought to the side of the staging as a precaution in case the chains might break or an accident occur, so as to be away from the line of the bridge, and so it did not matter where we dropped the cylinder ring I had 'extra' out of, but it was an ugly fish to hook I can tell you, and is about the only one I ever wished to get away, or did not want to see.

"Of course the cylinder went down all right afterwards, and the cause of the tilting was considered to be the remains of a wreck; but it strikes me, should they have to drive piles or sink cylinders anywhere near that pier, they may meet with some obstruction, and perhaps think they have struck rock; anyhow they will find out they have not 'struck oil,' and may send forth the news that a recent discovery has shown the early Britons built ironclads, and it was certain they sank, but there was not sufficient evidence to show whether the warships floated for many days."

CHAPTER X.

DRAIN PIPES. BLASTING, AND POWDER-CARRIAGE.

"The experience you had with cylinder bridge piers reminds me of a near shave for a bowl out I had. They let me a quarter of a mile of work, and I had to put in an 18-inch pipe at the deepest part of an embankment, just to take any surface-water that might accumulate now and again. Of course, an 18-inch pipe will take a lot of water, and I think we agree it is hardly right and proper to throw away good material or provide against events which, an earthquake always excepted, cannot occur in the opinion of the most experienced. You can't accuse me of being wasteful, it's not in me; for I've heard my mother say she never knew me upset anything I could eat or drink, and that I always licked my plate and never lost a crumb. You know it is a quality born in you, and I don't wish to take any credit myself, not me; I'm constructed different. Nor do I wish to say you are not so careful as me, and perhaps more; only, of course, you may put in a lot of strong work when I am not looking, and I think you'll have to do to get level with me. It never was in my heart to see anything wasted. It is against my principles. I hate it, I do.

"I said to myself, 'You shall not waste any material.' So what I did was to put five lengths of 18-inch pipe at each end of the slope, and 9-inch in the middle. The tip was almost on the spot, so I put in the 18-inch and the other pipes, and left a couple of lengths bare each end. The embankment was over 40 feet in height, the slopes were one and a-half to one, and the drain was about 50 yards in length, so it was not bad business.

"I never forget what the engineers tell me, and when I hear a discussion among them I always make a note of it, and wait till I have an opportunity of making a bit 'extra' profit by it. What is the use to the likes of us of a bit of education if we can't turn it into gold? Not much; almost sheer waste, and I hate waste‌—‌abominate it. Well, one day the resident engineer was talking to another swell about how a splayed nozzle to a pipe caused an increased discharge.

"So, ever ready to learn, as you and me always are, I said to myself, fond-like and quiet, 'Try it; put it into practice.' And I did, as I told you just now, by the insertion in true scientific manner of smaller pipes in the middle. I wrestled with the subject, and said to myself, 'Now, look here, if I put in all 18-inch pipes that drain can't have a splayed nozzle, that's sure; in fact, it is fact.' So I said, continuing the discussion with myself, 'Don't be beaten. Let science lead you.' And I did."

"Fill up your glass, lad. Grasp. I'm hearty to you."

"Now, it was in the summer, and we are coming to my scare. I said to my men, 'Come an hour earlier to-morrow morning, for I have got a little extra work, and some of you call at my place on your road.'

"They came, and I had the 9-inch pipes handy, and away we went, about fifty of us, with a pipe or two each. It did not take long laying the pipes, nor covering up the lot. In any case you could hardly see through such a length, but as a precaution, I had the pipes put in a shade zigzag after the first six or seven lengths, so everything seemed all serene, at least, I thought so; but it was not, for I had the nearest shave for a bowl out that I ever had, and all on account of a bow-wow."

"How did it happen?"

"Well, the resident engineer came over with his pet dog, and I took to patting him, and felt really happy at the little bit of 'extra' I was to get out of these pipes, when the blessed dog began sniffing about one end and jumping up. The resident engineer got a bit excited.

"'Rat, is it, Dasher?' he said to his dog.

"The dog barked his reply to his master. The resident then said to me, 'Stop here with Dasher until I call him at the other end, as I intend him to go through the drain.'

"Before I could say a word, he was up and down the slopes, and at the other end of the pipe. I sat, or fell down, I don't know which, I did feel bad. I heard him call 'Dasher, Dasher.' The blessed dog rushed in, and then came back. His size was right for the 18-inch pipes but he was near too big in the barrel for a 9-inch pipe.

"To think that after working the show so smoothly and lovely to the satisfaction of all mankind as knew of it, and then to be bowled out by a 'phobia-breeding animal as hardly knows how to scratch his back, was too much. So I braced myself up, and said to myself, 'Mister Dasher you have not done me yet, not you, hardly. It will take a man to do it.'

"I patted him, and smiled pretty at him, and gave him a bit of biscuit, and grasped him round the middle just to see if he could get through the 9-inch lengths. I felt seven years younger when I found he could just manage it, but he would have to do it more like swimming than walking.

"Now I knew the pipes were all sound and whole, for I never put in broken goods, however small they may be.

"The engineer kept calling 'Dasher, Dasher,' so I said to him, through the pipe, 'Wait a minute, sir; Dasher, I fancy is not so used to tunnels as you and me. What do you say to try the other way in, sir, we all have our fancies?'

"I knew it was no use attempting to work him off, as he meant what he said, and would be sure to get suspicious‌—‌as he was no flat, I can tell you.

"Well, after a lot of urging, in went the blessed dog, and Stanley's journey in Darkest Africa was outdone then, I'm sure, and Dasher's rear-guard was in trouble.

"We waited, and called, and whistled, but could hear nothing. We must have waited half an hour I should say, at least it seemed to me as long, and the resident engineer shouted to me two or three times, 'If Dasher does not appear in a few minutes, your men must dig him out.'

"Lawks me, it makes me ill to think of the squalls there would have been if I had had to do that. I wished just then that no dogs had ever been made nor nothing on four legs except horses, cattle, sheep, and pigs; but I turned sympathetic like and went to the top of the embankment, and said, 'Perhaps there may be vermin up there; and I know Dasher is a game one, and won't back.'

"This pleased the resident engineer. Believe me, I would have given at that moment a sovereign to anyone who could have produced that dog.

"Old pal, you need not put your hand out, I said, 'at that moment.' Don't excite yourself. I know you are always thirsty, but you have got the gold hunger bad as well. Just keep quiet, and put your hand in your pocket."