Volume 152 — SOME MORE BAD WORDS.

In a recent verse adventure I compiled "a little list" Of the verbs deserving censure, Verbs that "never would be missed"; Now, to flatter the fastidious, Suffer me the work to crown With three epithets—all hideous— And one noisome noun. First, to add to the recital Of the words that gall and irk, Is the old offender "vital," Done to death by overwork; Only a prolonged embargo On its use by Press and pen Can recall this kind of argot Back to life again. I, in days not very distant, Though the memory gives me pain, From the awful word "insistent" Did not utterly refrain; Once it promised to refresh us, Seemed to be alert enough; Now I loathe it, laboured, precious— Merely verbal fluff. Thirdly, in the sheets that daily Cater for our vulgar needs, There's a word that figures gaily In reviewers' friendly screeds, Who declare a book's "arresting," Mostly, it must be confessed, Meaning just the problem-questing Which deserves arrest. Last and vilest of this bad band Is that noun of gruesome sound, "Uplift," which the clan of Chadband Hold in reverence profound; Used for a dynamic function 'Tis a word devoid of guile, Only as connoting unction It excites my bile. Why, fastidious poetaster, Waste your energy and breath Like a petulant schoolmaster Only doing words to death? Needlessly you slate and scourge us; War, that sifts and tries and tests, May be safely left to purge us Of these verbal pests.