VENICE UNPRESERVED
Reading edition
["Steamers have been started on the Grand Canal at Venice."—Globe.]
I stood in Venice on the Bridge of Sighs, A palace and a prison on each hand. I saw from out the wave black funnels rise Whence clouds of densest smoke I saw expand, And common steamboats, at a penny a mile, O'er the canal—saw many a person land Upon the piers. O Anguish! it does rile The Bard to see all this—and what a smell of ile!
THE MERRY SWISS LANDLORD TO THE TRAVELLER WHO HAS BEEN PLUNDERED
Briton, assuage this futile rage! Your curses are in vain. You vow you'll go, but well I know You'll cut to come again!
THE RETURN OF THE TOURIST
ADVANTAGES OF A CLASSICAL EDUCATION
Mr. Mould. "Let it remain here, and I'll come back for it!"
Chef de Gare. "Je n'comprends pas, m'sieur!"
Mrs. Mould. "Try him in Latin, my love."
Mr. Mould. "All right. Look here, mossoo—Requiescat in pace—resurgam!"
Chef de Gare. "Ah! parfaitement! Que ça reste ici, et puis vous reviendrez!"