MORS IABROCHII
Reading edition
Coesper[1] erat: tunc lubriciles[2] ultravia circum Urgebant gyros gimbiculosque tophi; Moestenui visae borogovides ire meatu; Et profugi gemitus exgrabuêre rathae.
O fuge Iabrochium, sanguis meus![3] Ille recurvis Unguibus, estque avidis dentibus ille minax. Ububae fuge cautus avis vim, gnate! Neque unquam Faederpax contra te frumiosus eat!
Vorpali gladio juvenis succingitur: hostis Manxumus ad medium quaeritur usque diem: Jamque viâ fesso, sed plurima mente prementi, Tumtumiae frondis suaserat umbra moram.
Consilia interdum stetit egnia[4] mene revolvens; At gravis in densa fronde susuffrus[5] erat, Spiculaque[6] ex oculis jacientis flammea, tulseam Per silvam venit burbur[7] labrochii!
Vorpali, semel atque iterum collectus in ictum, Persnicuit gladis persnacuitque puer: Deinde galumphatus, spernens informe Cadaver, Horrendum monstri rettulit ipse caput.
Victor Iabrochii, spoliis insignis opimis, Rursus in amplexus, o radiose, meos! O frabiose dies! CALLO clamateque CALLA! Vix potuit lastus chorticulare pater.
Coesper erat: tune lubriciles ultravia circum Urgebant gyros gimbiculosque tophi; Moestenui visæ borogovides ire meatu; Et profugi gemitus exgrabuêre rathæ.
Anonymous.
[Footnote 1: Coesper from Coena and vesper.]
[Footnote 2: lubriciles from lubricus and graciles. See the Commentary in Humpty Dumpty's square, which will also explain ultravia, and—if it requires explanation—moestenui.]
[Footnote 3: Sanguis meus: cf. Verg. Aen. 6. 836, "Projice tela manu, sanguis meus!"]
[Footnote 4: egnia: "muffish" = segnis; … "uffish" = egnis. This is a conjectural analogy, but I can suggest no better solution.]
[Footnote 5: susuffrus : "whiffling" :: susurrus : "whistling."]
[Footnote 6: spicula: see the picture.]
[Footnote 7: burbur: apparently a labial variation of murmur, stronger but more dissonant.]