TEXT (continued 3)

Pug is brought to New-gate. Here you are lodg’d, Sir, you muſt ſend your garniſh, If you’ll be priuat. Pvg. There it is, Sir, leaue me. To New-gate, brought? How is the name of Deuill Diſcredited in me! What a loſt fiend Shall I be, on returne? My Cheife will roare 5 In triumph, now, that I haue beene on earth, A day, and done no noted thing, but brought That body back here, was hang’d out this morning. Well! would it once were midnight, that I knew My vtmoſt. I thinke Time be drunke, and ſleepes; 10 He is ſo ſtill, and moues not! I doe glory Now i’ my torment. Neither can I expect it, I haue it with my fact. Enter Iniquity the Vice. Ini. Child of hell, be thou merry: Put a looke on, as round, boy, and red as a cherry. Caſt care at thy poſternes; and firke i’ thy fetters, 15 They are ornaments, Baby, haue graced thy betters: Looke vpon me, and hearken. Our Cheife doth ſalute thee, And leaſt the coldyron ſhould chance to confute thee, H’hath ſent thee, grant-paroll by me to ſtay longer A moneth here on earth, againſt cold Child, or honger. 20 Pvg. How? longer here a moneth? Ing. Yes, boy, till the Seſſion, That ſo thou mayeſt haue a triumphall egreſſion. Pvg. In a cart, to be hang’d. Ing. No, Child, in a Carre, The charriot of Triumph, which moſt of them are. And in the meane time, to be greazy, and bouzy, 25 And naſty, and filthy, and ragged and louzy, With dam’n me, renounce me, and all the fine phraſes; That bring, vnto Tiborne, the plentifull gazes. Pvg. He is a Diuell! and may be our Cheife! [165] The great Superiour Diuell! for his malice: 30 Arch-diuel! I acknowledge him. He knew What I would ſuffer, when he tie’d me vp thus In a rogues body: and he has (I thanke him) His tyrannous pleaſure on me, to confine me To the vnlucky carkaſſe of a Cutpurſe, 35 wherein I could do nothing. The great Deuill enters, and vpbraids him with all his dayes worke. Div. Impudent fiend, Stop thy lewd mouth. Doeſt thou not ſhame and tremble To lay thine owne dull damn’d defects vpon An innocent caſe, there? Why thou heauy ſlaue! The ſpirit, that did poſſeſſe that fleſh before 40 Put more true life, in a finger, and a thumbe, Then thou in the whole Maſſe. Yet thou rebell’ſt And murmur’ſt? What one profer haſt thou made, Wicked inough, this day, that might be call’d Worthy thine owne, much leſſe the name that ſent thee? 45 Firſt, thou did’ſt helpe thy ſelfe into a beating Promptly, and with’t endangered’ſt too thy tongue: A Diuell, and could not keepe a body intire One day! That, for our credit. And to vindicate it, Hinderd’ſt (for ought thou know’ſt) a deed of darkneſſe: 50 Which was an act of that egregious folly, As no one, to’ard the Diuel, could ha’ thought on. This for your acting! but for suffering! why Thou haſt beene cheated on, with a falſe beard, And a turn’d cloake. Faith, would your predeceſſour 55 The Cutpurſe, thinke you, ha’ been ſo? Out vpon thee, The hurt th’ haſt don, to let men know their ſtrength, And that the’are able to out-doe a diuel Put in a body, will for euer be A ſcarre vpon our Name! whom haſt thou dealt with, 60 Woman or man, this day, but haue out-gone thee Some way, and moſt haue prou’d the better fiendes? Yet, you would be imploy’d? Yes, hell ſhall make you Prouinciall o’ the Cheaters! or Bawd-ledger, For this ſide o’ the towne! No doubt you’ll render 65 A rare accompt of things. Bane o’ your itch, And ſcratching for imployment. I’ll ha’ brimſtone To allay it ſure, and fire to ſindge your nayles off, But, that I would not ſuch a damn’d diſhonor Sticke on our ſtate, as that the diuell were hang’d; 70 And could not ſaue a body, that he tooke From Tyborne, but it muſt come thither againe: You ſhould e’en ride. But, vp away with him— Iniquity takes him on his back. Ini. Mount, dearling of darkneſſe, my ſhoulders are broad: He that caries the fiend, is ſure of his loade. 75 The Diuell was wont to carry away the euill; [166] But, now, the Euill out-carries the Diuell.

A great noise is heard in New-gate, and the Keepers come out affrighted. O mee! Kee. 1. What’s this? 2. A piece of Iustice Hall Is broken downe. 3. Fough! what a ſteeme of brimſtone Is here? 4. The priſoner’s dead, came in but now! Sha. Ha? where? 4. Look here. Kee. S’lid, I ſhuld know his countenance! It is Gill-Cut-purſe, was hang’d out, this morning! 5 Sha. ’Tis he! 2. The Diuell, ſure, has a hand in this! 3. What ſhall wee doe? Sha. Carry the newes of it Vnto the Sherifes. 1. And to the Iuſtices. 4. This ſtrange! 3. And ſauours of the Diuell, ſtrongly! 2. I’ ha’ the ſulphure of Hell-coale i’ my noſe. 10 1. Fough. Sha. Carry him in. 1. Away. 2. How ranke it is!

The Iuſtice comes out wondring, and the reſt informing him. This was the notableſt Conſpiracy, That ere I heard of. Mer. Sir, They had giu’n him potions, That did enamour him on the counterfeit Lady— Eve. Iuſt to the time o’ deliuery o’ the deed— Mer. And then the witchcraft ’gan’t’ appeare, for ſtreight 5 He fell into his fit. Eve. Of rage at firſt, Sir, Which ſince, has ſo increaſed. Tay. Good S^r. Poule, ſee him, And puniſh the impoſtors. Pov. Therefore I come, Madame. Eit. Let M^r. Etherſide alone, Madame. Pov. Do you heare? Call in the Conſtable, I will haue him by: 10 H’is the Kings Officer! and ſome Cittizens, [167] Of credit! I’ll diſcharge my conſcience clearly. Mer. Yes, Sir, and ſend for his wife. Eve. And the two Sorcerers, By any meanes! Tay. I thought one a true Lady, I ſhould be ſworne. So did you, Eyther-ſide? 15 Eit. Yes, by that light, would I might ne’r ſtir elſe, Tailbuſh. Tay. And the other a ciuill Gentleman. Eve. But, Madame, You know what I told your Ladyſhip. Tay. I now ſee it: I was prouiding of a banquet for ’hem. After I had done inſtructing o’ the fellow 20 De-uile, the Gentlemans man. Mer. Who’s found a thiefe, Madam. And to haue rob’d your Vsher, Maſter Ambler, This morning. Tay. How? Mer. I’ll tell you more, anon. Fit. Gi me ſome garlicke, garlicke, garlicke, garlicke. He beginnes his fit. Mer. Harke the poore Gentleman, how he is tormented! 25 Fit. My wife is a whore, I’ll kiſſe her no more: and why? Ma’ſt not thou be a Cuckold, as well as I? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, &c. Pov. That is the Diuell ſpeakes, and laughes in him. The Iuſtice interpret all: Mer. Do you thinke ſo, S^r. Pov. I diſcharge my conſcience. 30 Fit. And is not the Diuell good company? Yes, wis. Eve. How he changes, Sir, his voyce! Fit. And a Cuckold is Where ere hee put his head, with a a Wanion, If his hornes be forth, the Diuells companion! Looke, looke, looke, elſe. Mer. How he foames! Eve. And ſwells! 35 Tay. O, me! what’s that there, riſes in his belly! Eit. A ſtrange thing! hold it downe: Tra. Pit. We cannot, Madam. Pov. ’Tis too apparent this! Fit. Wittipol, Wittipol. Wittipol, and Manly and Mistr. Fitz-dottrel enter. Wit. How now, what play ha’ we here. Man. What fine, new matters? Wit. The Cockſcomb, and the Couerlet. Mer. O ſtrang impudēce! 40 That theſe ſhould come to face their ſinne! Eve. And out-face Iuſtice, they are the parties, Sir. Pov. Say nothing. Mer. Did you marke, Sir, vpon their comming in, How he call’d Wittipol. Eve. And neuer ſaw ’hem. Pov. I warrant you did I, let ’hem play a while. 45 Fit. Buz, buz, buz, buz. Tay. Laſſe poore Gentleman! How he is tortur’d! M^rs. Fi. Fie, Maſter Fitz-dottrel! What doe you meane to counterfait thus? Fit. O, ô, His wife goes to him. Shee comes with a needle, and thruſts it in, Shee pulls out that, and ſhee puts in a pinne, 50 And now, and now, I doe not know how, nor where, But ſhee pricks mee heere, and ſhee pricks me there: ôh, ôh: Pov. Woman forbeare. Wit. What, S^r? Pov. A practice foule For one ſo faire: Wit. Hath this, then, credit with you? Man. Do you beleeue in’t? Pov. Gentlemen, I’ll diſcharge My conſcience. ’Tis a cleare conſpiracy! 56 A darke, and diuelliſh practice! I deteſt it! Wit. The Iuſtice ſure will proue the merrier man! [168] Man. This is moſt ſtrange, Sir! Pov. Come not to confront Authority with impudence: I tell you, I doe deteſt it. Here comes the Kings Conſtable, And with him a right worſhipfull Commoner; My good friend, Maſter Guilt-head! I am glad I can before ſuch witneſſes, profeſſe My conſcience, and my deteſtation of it. 65 Horible! moſt vnaturall! Abominable! Eve. You doe not tumble enough. Mer. Wallow, gnaſh: They whiſper him. Tay. O, how he is vexed! Pov. ’Tis too manifeſt. Eve. Giue him more ſoap to foame with, now lie ſtill. and giue him ſoape to act with. Mer. And act a little. Tay. What do’s he now, S^r. Pov. Shew The taking of Tabacco, with which the Diuell Is ſo delighted. Fit. Hum! Pov. And calls for Hum. You takers of ſtrong Waters, and Tabacco, Marke this. Fit. Yellow, yellow, yellow, yellow, &c. Pov. That’s Starch! the Diuells Idoll of that colour. 75 He ratifies it, with clapping of his hands. The proofes are pregnant. Gvi. How the Diuel can act! Pov. He is the Maſter of Players! Master Guilt-head, And Poets, too! you heard him talke in rime! I had forgot to obſerue it to you, ere while! 80 Tay. See, he ſpits fire. Pov. O no, he plaies at Figgum, The Diuell is the Author of wicked Figgum— Sir Poule interprets Figgum to be a Iuglers game. Man. Why ſpeake you not vnto him? Wit. If I had All innocence of man to be indanger’d, And he could ſaue, or ruine it: I’ld not breath 85 A ſyllable in requeſt, to ſuch a foole, He makes himſelfe. Fit. O they whiſper, whiſper, whiſper. Wee ſhall haue more, of Diuells a ſcore, To come to dinner, in mee the ſinner. Eyt. Alas, poore Gentleman! Pov. Put ’hem aſunder. 90 Keepe ’hem one from the other. Man. Are you phrenticke, Sir, Or what graue dotage moues you, to take part VVith so much villany? wee are not afraid Either of law, or triall; let vs be Examin’d what our ends were, what the meanes? 95 To worke by, and poſſibility of thoſe meanes. Doe not conclude againſt vs, ere you heare vs. Pov. I will not heare you, yet I will conclude Out of the circumſtances. Man. VVill you ſo, Sir? Pov. Yes, they are palpable: Man. Not as your folly: 100 Pov. I will diſcharge my conſcience, and doe all To the Meridian of Iuſtice: Gvi. You doe well, Sir. Fit. Prouide mee to eat, three or foure diſhes o’ good meat, I’ll feaſt them, and their traines, a Iuſtice head and braines Shall be the firſt. Pov. The Diuell loues not Iuſtice, [169] There you may ſee. Fit. A ſpare-rib O’ my wife, 106 And a whores purt’nance! a Guilt-head whole. Pov. Be not you troubled, Sir, the Diuell ſpeakes it. Fit. Yes, wis, Knight, ſhite, Poule, Ioule, owle, foule, troule, boule. Pov. Crambe, another of the Diuell’s games! 110 Mer. Speake. Sir, ſome Greeke, if you can. Is not the Iuſtice A ſolemne gameſter? Eve. Peace. Fit. Οὶ μοὶ, κακοδαιμων, Καὶ τρισκακοδαίμων, καὶ τετράκις, καὶ πεντάκις, Καὶ δοδεκάκις, καὶ μυριάκις. Pov. Hee curſes. In Greeke, I thinke. Eve. Your Spaniſh, that I taught you. 115 Fit. Quebrémos el ojo de burlas, Eve. How? your reſt— Let’s breake his necke in ieſt, the Diuell ſaies. Fit. Di grátia, Signòr mio ſe haúete denári fataméne parte. Mer. What, would the Diuell borrow money? Fit. Ouy, Ouy Monſieur, ùn pàuure Diable! Diablet in! 120 Pov. It is the diuell, by his ſeuerall langauges. Enter the Keeper of New-gate. Sha. Where’s S^r. Poule Ether-ſide? Pov. Here, what’s the matter? Sha. O! ſuch an accident falne out at Newgate, Sir: A great piece of the priſon is rent downe! The Diuell has beene there, Sir, in the body— 125 Of the young Cut-Purſe, was hang’d out this morning, But, in new clothes, Sir, euery one of vs know him. Theſe things were found in his pocket. Amb. Thoſe are mine, S^r. Sha. I thinke he was commited on your charge, Sir. For a new felony. Amb. Yes. Sha. Hee’s gone, Sir, now, 130 And left vs the dead body. But withall, Sir, Such an infernall ſtincke, and ſteame behinde, You cannot ſee S^t. Pulchars Steeple, yet. They ſmell’t as farre as Ware, as the wind lies, 134 By this time, ſure. Fit. Is this vpon your credit, friend? Fitz-dottrel leaues counterfaiting. Sha. Sir, you may ſee, and ſatisfie your ſelfe. Fit. Nay, then, ’tis time to leaue off counterfeiting. Sir I am not bewitch’d, nor haue a Diuell: No more then you. I doe defie him, I, And did abuſe you. Theſe two Gentlemen 140 Put me vpon it. (I haue faith againſt him) They taught me all my tricks. I will tell truth, And ſhame the Feind. See, here, Sir, are my bellowes, And my falſe belly, and my Mouſe, and all That ſhould ha’ come forth? Man. Sir, are not you aſham’d Now of your ſolemne, ſerious vanity? 146 Pov. I will make honorable amends to truth. Fit. And ſo will I. But theſe are Coozeners, ſtill; And ha’ my land, as plotters, with my wife: Who, though ſhe be not a witch, is worſe, a whore. 150 Man. Sir, you belie her. She is chaſte, and vertuous, And we are honeſt. I doe know no glory [170] A man ſhould hope, by venting his owne follyes, But you’ll ſtill be an Aſſe, in ſpight of prouidence. Pleaſe you goe in, Sir, and heare truths, then iudge ’hem: And make amends for your late raſhneſſe; when, 156 You ſhall but heare the paines and care was taken, To ſaue this foole from ruine (his Grace of Drown’d-land) Fit. My land is drown’d indeed— Pov. Peace. Man. And how much His modeſt, and too worthy wife hath ſuffer’d 160 By miſ-conſtruction, from him, you will bluſh, Firſt, for your owne beliefe, more for his actions! His land is his: and neuer, by my friend, Or by my ſelfe, meant to another vſe, But for her ſuccours, who hath equall right. 165 If any other had worſe counſells in’t, (I know I ſpeake to thoſe can apprehend mee) Let ’hem repent ’hem, and be not detected. It is not manly to take ioy, or pride In humane errours. (wee doe all ill things, 170 They doe ’hem worſt that loue ’hem, and dwell there, Till the plague comes) The few that haue the ſeeds Of goodneſſe left, will ſooner make their way To a true life, by ſhame, then puniſhment.

Thus, the Proiecter, here, is ouer-throwne. But I have now a Proiect of mine owne, If it may paſſe: that no man would inuite The Poet from vs, to ſup forth to night, 5 If the play pleaſe. If it diſpleaſant be, We doe preſume, that no man will: nor wee.