THE INNOCENTS ABROAD

Ancient painters never succeeded in denationalizing themselves Apocryphal New Testament Astonishing talent for seeing things that had already passed Bade our party a kind good-bye, and proceeded to count spoons Base flattery to call them immoral Bones of St Denis But it is an ill-wind that blows nobody good Buy the man out, goodwill and all By dividing this statement up among eight Carry soap with them Chapel of the Invention of the Cross Christopher Colombo Clustered thick with stony, mutilated saints Commend me to Fennimore Cooper to find beauty in the Indians Conceived a sort of unwarrantable unfriendliness Confer the rest of their disastrous patronage on some other firm Creator made Italy from designs by Michael Angelo! Cringing spirit of those great men Diffident young man, mild of moustache, affluent of hair Expression Felt that it was not right to steal grapes Fenimore Cooper Indians Filed away among the archives of Russia—in the stove For dismal scenery, I think Palestine must be the prince Free from self-consciousness—which is at breakfast Fumigation is cheaper than soap Fun—but of a mild type Getting rich very deliberately—very deliberately indeed Guides Have a prodigious quantity of mind He never bored but he struck water He ought to be dammed—or leveed Holy Family always lived in grottoes How tame a sight his country's flag is at home I am going to try to worry along without it I carried the sash along with me—I did not need the sash I had a delicacy about going home and getting thrashed I was not scared, but I was considerably agitated Is, ah—is he dead? It is a hopeless, dreary, heart-broken land It is inferior—for coffee—but it is pretty fair tea It used to be a good hotel, but that proves nothing It was warm. It was the warmest place I ever was in Joshua Journals so voluminously begun Keg of these nails—of the true cross Lean and mean old age Man peculiarly and insufferably self-conceited: not seasick Marks the exact centre of the earth Nauseous adulation of princely patrons Never did succeed in making those idiots understand their own language Never left any chance for newspaper controversies Never uses a one-syllable word when he can think of a longer one No satisfaction in being a Pope in those days Not afraid of a million Bedouins Not bring ourselves to think St John had two sets of ashes Old Travelers One is apt to overestimate beauty when it is rare Only solitary thing one does not smell in Turkey Oriental splendor! Original first shoddy contract mentioned in history Overflowing his banks People talk so glibly of "feeling," "expression," "tone," Perdition catch all the guides Picture which one ought to see once—not oftener Polite hotel waiter who isn't an idiot Relic matter a little overdone? Room to turn around in, but not to swing a cat Saviour, who seems to be of little importance any where in Rome Self-satisfied monarch, the railroad conductor of America Sentimental praises of the Arab's idolatry of his horse She assumes a crushing dignity Shepherd's Hotel, which is the worst on earth Smell about them which is peculiar but not entertaining Some people can not stand prosperity Somewhat singular taste in the matter of relics St Charles Borromeo, Bishop of Milan St Helena, the mother of Constantine Starving to death Stirring times here for a while if the last trump should blow Tahoe means grasshoppers. It means grasshopper soup The information the ancients didn't have was very voluminous The Last Supper There was a good deal of sameness about it They were like nearly all the Frenchwomen I ever saw—homely They were seasick. And I was glad of it Those delightful parrots who have "been here before" To give birth to an idea Toll the signal for the St Bartholomew's Massacre Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry and narrow-mindedness Uncomplaining impoliteness Under the charitable moon Used fine tooth combs—successfully Venitian visiting young ladies Wandering Jew Wasn't enough of it to make a pie We all like to see people seasick when we are not, ourselves Well provided with cigars and other necessaries of life What's a fair wind for us is a head wind to them Whichever one they get is the one they want Who have actually forgotten their mother tongue in three months Worth while to get tired out, because one so enjoys resting