Volume 104 — ETHNOGRAPHICAL ALPHABET.
Reading edition
A is an Afghan, whose knife bids one quail; B is a Boer, who made England turn pale; C is a Chinaman, proud of his tail; D is a Dutchman, who loves pipe and ale; E is an Eskimo, packed like a bale; F is a Frenchman, à Paris fidèle; G is a German, he fought tooth and nail; H is a Highlander, otherwise Gael; I is an Irishman, just out of gaol; J is a Jew at a furniture sale; K is a Kalmuck, not high in the scale; L is a Lowlander, swallowing kale; M a Malay, a most murderous male; N a Norwegian, who dwells near the whale; O is an Ojibway, brave on the trail; P is a Pole with a past to bewail; Q is a Queenslander, sunburnt and hale; R is a Russian, against whom we rail; S is a Spaniard, as slow as a snail; T is a Turk with his wife in a veil; U a United States' Student at Yale; V a Venetian in gondola frail; W Welshman, with coal, slate,—and shale; X is a Xanthian—or is he too stale?— Y is a Yorkshireman, bred by the Swale; Z is a Zulu;—and now letters fail.
The Latest Paradox.—John Strange Winter is taking Summer-y proceedings against the Coming Crinoline. Henceforth she will be always known as "the Winter of our Discontent."
"Good Bus."—From the Times money article we learn that Parr's Banking Co., Limited, is paying 19 per cent. The price of the shares, therefore, must be considerably "above par." Capital this, for Ma'!
SHOCKING TRADE OUTRAGE!
(Scene from the New and Unpopular Sensation Drama of "The Monopoly-Monster and the Maid Forlorn.")
"OH! WHO'LL BRING A RESCUE OR TWO TO THE HELP OF A MUCH-INJURED MAID, THUS CRUELLY BOUND HAND AND FOOT, AND BY MISCREANTS RUTHLESSLY LAID ON THE LINES, IN THE PATHWAY OF PERIL? THE MONSTER SNORTS NEARER! BOHOO! 'TIS A MELODRAME-CRISIS OF DANGER!—AND WHO'LL BRING A RESCUE OR TWO?"
SUBACIDITIES.
Gladys. "Oh, Muriel dear, that heavenly Frock!—I think it looks lovelier every Year!"