Volume 101 — POPULAR SONGS RE-SUNG:
Reading edition
OR, MISS BOWDLER AT THE MUSIC HALLS.
"A nod is as good as a wink to a blind horse," says the old saw, and a wink is no doubt as good as a smile to a purblind ass. But the wink is indeed one of the worst uses to which the human eye can he put. It signifies usually the vulgarisation of humour, and the degradation of mirth. It is the favourite eye-language of the cynical cad, the coarse jester, the crapulous clown, and—above all—the chuckling cheat.
It must be admitted, that the Muse of the Music Hall—in her Momus mood—has a strong leaning towards the glorification of cynical 'cuteness of the Autolycus sort. It is a weakness which she seems to share with party scribes and Colonial politicians. If she had any classic leanings, which she has not, her favourite deity would be Mercury, the "winking Cyllenian Argophont" of the Homeric Hymn, the "little cradled rogue," the Apollo-cheating babe, "the lord of those who swindle, house-break, sheep-steal and shop-lift," under whom Autolycus prided himself upon having been "littered." Autolycus's complacent self-gratulation, "How bless'd are we that are not simple men!" would appeal to the heart of the Music-hall votary. "Ha, ha! what a fool Honesty is! and Trust his sworn brother, a very simple gentleman" is, virtually, the burthen of dozens of the most favourite of the Music-hall ditties.
Sly-scheming Hermes "winked" knowingly at Jupiter when he was "pitching his yarn" about the stolen oxen, and Jupiter "according to his wont,"
"Laughed heartily to hear the subtle witted Infant give such a plausible account, And every word a lie."
So the Music-hall Muse "winks" knowingly, and knavishly, at her audience, and her audience "laugh heartily," in Jovian guffaws, at her winks. What wonder then that she should lyrically apostrophise "The Wink" in laudatory numbers?
"Say, boys, now is it quite the thing?"
she cries in sham deprecation, but all the while she "winks the other eye" in a way her hearers quite understand. "Cabby knows his fare," and the Music-hall Muse knows her clients. What, we wonder, would be her reception did she really carry out her ironically pretended protest and sing to the chuckling cads who applaud her, the following version of her favourite lay?
No. II.—THE WINK OF ROGUERY'S EYE.
AIR—"Wink the Other Eye."
Say, boys, whatever do men mean When they wink the other eye? Why, when "sharps" say the world is "green," Do they wink the other eye? The Radicals and Tories both tell stories, not a few, About Measures falsely promised, and reforms long overdue; And when the simple Mob believes that every word is true. Then they—wink the other eye!
Chorus.—Say, boys, now is it quite the thing! Say, should we let them have their fling? Ah, when they get us "on a string" Then they wink the other eye!
Say, boys are Leaders to be loved, When they wink the other eye? By artful speech the Mob is moved, Till it winks the other eye; The optic Wink's the language of the sly and sordid soul, The mute freemasonry of Fraud, sign-post to Roguery's goal. When Circe sees her votaries swine ready in sludge to roll Then she winks the other eye!
Chorus.—Say, boys, is it so fine a thing, Low Cunning, which Cheat's laureates sing, The Comus of the Mart and Ring, Who—winks the other eye?
Say, boys, is Cunning's promise good, When she winks the other eye? Noodledom seeks her neighbourhood, And winks its other eye. For no one winks so freely as a fool who thinks he's sly; The dupe of deeper knavery smirks in shallow mimicry Of the smirking JERRY DIDDLER who is sucking him so dry, And who winks the other eye.
Chorus.—Say, boys, now is the Wink a thing Worthy of worship; will you fling Your caps in air for the Knave-King Who—winks the other eye?
The Politician plucks his geese, Then he winks the other eye. Brazen Fraud steals Trade's Golden Fleece, Then he winks the other eye. Autolycus pipes ballads; public pockets are his aim; Rabagas raves of "liberty"; advancement is his game; And when their dupes aren't looking all these rogues do just the same, They—wink the other eye!
Chorus.—Say, boys, pæans will you sing To winking harpies all a-wing To prey on fools; who steal, and sting, And—wink the other eye?
Wisdom may smile, but Cunning can't, She winks the other eye. Humour shall chortle, Mockery shan't, She winks the other eye. The stars above us twinkle and the dews beneath us blink, All the eyes of Nature sparkle, and from merriment do not shrink, The Language of the Eye of Cynic Knavery is—the Wink! Roguery "winks the other eye!"
Chorus.—Say, boys, is it quite the thing?
Trust me 'tis Rascals in a Ring
Who wink the other eye!