Volume 158 — DER TAG ONCE MORE.
Reading edition
[“One hundred Diplomatists’ Writing Tables, Cupboards, etc., for immediate delivery.—Office Furniture Manufacturers, —— and Co., ——, Berlin.”—The Times “Business Opportunities” column.]
Lightly loose the silken cable, Swell, ye sails, by zephyrs kissed, Bearing me the walnut table Thumped by Bethmann-Hollweg’s fist; Steering, not by course erratic, Safe to the appointed wharf, Bring, O bark, the diplomatic Kneehole desk of Ludendorff. Softly now, ye dockers, pardie, Cease your wrangling for a bit, Dump the seat whereon Bernhardi Bowed his dreadful form to sit; Make no scratch however tiny When the circling crane-arm sags On the chair that rendered shiny Hindenburg’s enormous bags. Blotting-papered, india-rubbered, Good as new, with pencils piled, Bring me the immortal cupboard Where the Hymn of Hate was filed; Who can say how oft, when brisker Beat the heart behind his ribs, Tirpitz wiped upon a whisker Pensively these part-worn nibs? Here are Kultur’s very presses, Calendars that marked The Day, Max von Baden’s ink-recesses, Dernberg’s correspondence-tray; Gone the imperial years, and cooler Counsels on the Spree are planned, Still one may acquire the ruler Toyed with by a War Lord’s hand. Waft them then, ye winds, let Fritz’s Office furniture be mine; Each one of these priceless bits is Salvage from a Junker shrine; Breathing still the ancient essence, They shall give me, when I speak, Something of the German presence And the blazing German cheek. Evoe.
MANNERS AND MODES.
OWING TO THE SHORTAGE AND PROHIBITIVE PRICE OF SILK STOCKINGS, THE LADIES MAYFAIR DECIDE TO DO WITHOUT THEM AND HAVE RECOURSE TO PAINT.
Mistress (to maid who has just served boarders’ breakfast). “What were they talking about, Jane?”
Jane. “You, Mum.”