"NANA WOULD NOT GIVE ME A BOW-WOW!"
Reading edition
A Pretty Little Song for Pettish Little Emperors. (Latest Teutonic Version of Mr. Joseph Tabrar's Popular Song.)
[The German Emperor is reported to have said, "It was impossible for me to anticipate the rejection of the Army Bills, so fully did I rely upon the patriotism of the Imperial Diet to accept them unreservedly. A patriotic minority has been unable to prevail against the majority.... I was compelled to resort to a dissolution, and I look forward to the acceptance of the Bills by the new Reichstag. Should this expectation be again disappointed, I am determined to use every means in my power to achieve my purpose."—The Times.]
Wilful Wilhelm sings:—
You ask me why I do not smile; the reason you shall know; I had a disappointment huge a day or two ago; I asked my venerable Nurse to give me no more toys, But just a little Dog of War to bite the other boys. Spoken. But oh! Audience (of Generals and Staff Officers). What? Nana wouldn't give me that bow-wow Wow-wow! The Reichstag wouldn't grant me that bow-wow! Wow-wow! No; she denied me—flat. Now, what do you think of that? And I'd set my mind on that bow-wow-wow! Wow-wow-wow! Some years ago she did the same, the greedy bad old girl! But I've set my mind upon that dog, sharp teeth and coat a-curl. The other boys have got such tykes, and I should be a mug, If when they run to mastiffs I'm put off with a small pug. Audience. Well? Spoken. Well, I mean to make her give me that bow-wow! Wow-wow! I'll worry her until she buys that bow-wow! Wow-wow! I'll dissolve the Imperial Diet, And I never will be quiet Until I get that bow-wow-wow! Wow-wow-wow! I always meant when I grew old to do just as I pleased, I'd have a dozen bow-wows then, and if the old Trot teased I'd shut her up, and everyone who backed her, like a shot; For no one who opposes Me can be a pat-ri-ot! Audience. Why? Spoken. Because France has got ahead with her bow-wow! Wow-wow! Russia makes me jealous with her bow-wow! Wow-wow! And now it is my turn To leave them well astern, And I can't without that bow-wow-wow! Wow-wow-wow! I didn't shake old Bizzy off to take Caprivi up, To let my old Nurse thwart me in my longing for this pup. 'Tis true that I have other tykes, a pack of 'em indeed— But what of that? I want one more, of this particular breed. Audience. Well? Spoken. Well, I will, whatever happens, have this bow-wow! Wow-wow! I'll have it very soon, if not just now-now! Wow-wow! My purpose I'll achieve, And the Reichstag never leave Until I get possession of that bow-wow-wow! Wow-wow-wow!
A Question of Title.—A recent speech by Mr. Lockwood, Q.C., M.P., on the Art of Cross-Examination has been called "deliciously frank." Henceforth, the genial Recorder of York is to be known as Mr. Deliciously Frank Lockwood.
A SOVEREIGN MAXIM.
He who risks the answer Nay, When he asks he shall have May.
