A l l Y o u N e e d i n N e w Y o r k

by Lee Fairchild.

Illustration by Wm. Van Benthuysen.

SHAVE and a dollar,

A shine and a collar,

Is all that you need in New York;

That is, if you’re clever

And never, oh, never

Are seen at the thing we call work.

When seated at dinner

Just for a beginner

Change waiters—a move for a bluff;

Talk “stocks” of the morrow

And then you may borrow

A crimpled crisp sign of real stuff.

Remember a story—

Quite new or quite hoary—

To quote to your host when you dine;

Be never a piker

But e’er a bold striker—

Aim high or the venture decline.

“Talk ‘stocks’ of the morrow.”