Perfect Behavior
Reading edition
by Donald Ogden Stewart
Illustrated by Ralph Barton
A Guide for Ladies and Gentlemen in all Social Crises
Those who are not self-possessed obtrude and pain us.—EMERSON A parody outline of etiquette by the Author of “A Parody Outline of History” The perfect gentleman is he who never unintentionally causes pain.—OLD PROVERB
TO THE BRIDEGROOM WHOSE WEDDING WAS RUINED BECAUSE THE BRIDE CAME DOWN THE AISLE ON THE RIGHT INSTEAD OF THE LEFT ARM OF HER FATHER With Deepest Sympathy