Note 59 — P (Continued) (continued 2)
Reading edition
A widow does not wear the tāli, which is removed at a gathering of relatives some days after her husband’s death. “The removal of the tāli of a widow,” Mr. Francis writes,59 “is effected in a curious manner. On the sixteenth day after the husband’s death, another woman stands behind the widow, who stoops forward, and unties the tāli in such a way that it falls into a vessel of milk placed to receive it. Adoption ceremonies are also odd. The adoptee’s feet are washed in turmeric water by the adopter, who then drinks a little of the liquid. Adoption is accordingly known as manjanīr kudikkiradu, or the drinking of turmeric water, and the adopted son as the manjanīr pillai, or turmeric water boy.” Paraiya women do not wear any distinctive dress when they are widows, and do not shave their heads. But they cease to paint the vermilion mark (kunkumam) on their foreheads, which married women who are living with their husbands always wear, except at times when they are considered ceremonially unclean. The widow of a Paraiyan, if not too old to bear children, generally lives with another man as his wife. Sometimes she is ceremonially married to him, and then wears the tāli. A widow practically chooses her own second husband, and is not restricted to any particular relative, such as her husband’s elder or younger brother. The practice of the Levirate, by which the younger brother takes the widow of the elder, is non-existent as a custom among Paraiyas, though instances of such unions may be found. Indeed the popular opinion of the Tamil caste credits the Paraiyan with little regard for any of the restrictions of consanguinity, either prohibitive or permissive. “The palmyra palm has no shadow: the Paraiyan has no regard for seemliness” is a common Tamil proverb.