ACTUS TERTIUS. SCENA PRIMA.

Enter three or four Boors.

1 B. Come, English beer Hostess, English beer by th' belly.

2 B. Stark beer boy, stout and strong beer: so, sit down Lads, And drink me upsey-Dutch: Frolick, and fear not.

Enter Higgen like a Sow-gelder, singing.

Hig. Have ye any work for the Sow-gelder, hoa, My horn goes too high too low, too high too low. Have ye any Piggs, Calves, or Colts, Have ye any Lambs in your holts To cut for the Stone, Here comes a cunning one. Have ye any braches to spade, Or e're a fair maid That would be a Nun, Come kiss me, 'tis done. Hark how my merry horn doth blow, Too high too low, too high too low.

1 B. O excellent! two-pence a piece boyes, two-pence a piece. Give the boys some drink there. Piper, wet your whistle, Canst tell me a way now, how to cut off my wifes Concupiscence?

Hig. I'le sing ye a Song for't.

The SONG.

Take her, and hug her, And turn her and tug her, And turn her again boy, again, Then if she mumble, Or if her tail tumble, Kiss her amain hoy, amain. Do thy endeavour, To take off her feaver, Then her disease no longer will raign. If nothing will serve her, Then thus to preserve her, Swinge her amain boy amain. Give her cold jelly To take up her belly, And once a day swinge her again, If she stand all these pains, Then knock out her brains, Her disease no longer will reign.

1 Bo. More excellent, more excellent, sweet Sow-gelder.

2 Bo. Three-pence a piece, three-pence a piece.

Hig. Will you hear a Song how the Devil was gelded?

3 Bo. I, I, let's hear the Devil roar, Sow-gelder.

SONG.

1. _He ran at me first in the shape of a Ram, And over and over the Sow-Gelder came; I rise and I halter'd him fast by the horn, I pluckt out his Stones as you'd pick out a Corn. Baa, quoth the Devil, and forth he slunk, And left us a Carcase of Mutton that stunk.

2. The next time I rode a good mile and a half, Where I heard he did live in disguise of a Calf, I bound and I gelt him, ere he did any evil; He was here at his best, but a sucking Devil. Maa, yet he cry'd, and forth he did steal, And this was sold after, for excellent Veal.

3. Some half a year after in the form of a Pig, I met with the Rogue, and he look'd very big; I catch'd at his leg, laid him down on a log, Ere a man could fart twice, I had made him a Hog. Owgh, quoth the Devil, and forth gave a Jerk, That a Jew was converted, and eat of the Perk._

1 Bo. Groats apiece, Groats apiece, Groats apiece, There sweet Sow-Gelder.

Enter Prig and Ferret.

Prig. Will ye see any feats of activity, Some Sleight of hand, Legerdemain? hey pass, Presto, be gone there?

2 Bo. Sit down Jugler.

Prig. Sirrah, play you your art well; draw near Piper: Look you, my honest friends, you see my hands; Plain dealing is no Devil: lend me some Money, Twelve-pence a piece will serve.

1. 2. B. There, there.

Prig. I thank you, Thank ye heartily: when shall I pay ye?

All B. Ha, ha, ha, by th' Mass this was a fine trick.

Prig. A merry sleight toy: but now I'll show your Worships A trick indeed.

Hig. Mark him well now my Masters.

Prig. Here are three balls, These balls shall be three bullets, One, two, and three: ascentibus, malentibus.

Presto, be gone: they are vanish'd: fair play, Gentlemen. Now these three, like three Bullets, from your three Noses Will I pluck presently: fear not, no harm Boys,

Titere, tu patule.

1 B. Oh, oh, oh.

Prig. Recubans sub jermlne fagi.

2 B. Ye pull too hard; ye pull too hard.

Prig. Stand fair then: Silvertramtrim-tram.

3 B. Hold, hold, hold.

Prig. Come aloft, bullets three, with a whim-wham. Have ye their Moneys?

Hig. Yes, yes.

1 B. Oh rare Jugler!

2 B. Oh admirable Jugler!

Prig. One trick more yet; Hey, come aloft; sa, sa, flim, flum, taradumbis? East, West, North, South, now fly like Jack with a bumbis. Now all your money's gone; pray search your pockets.

1 B. Humh.

2 B. He.

3 B. The Devil a penny's here!

Prig. This was a rare trick.

1 B. But 'twould be a far rarer to restore it.

Prig. I'll do ye that too; look upon me earnestly, And move not any ways your eyes from this place, This Button here? pow, whir, whiss, shake your pockets.

1 B. By th' Mass 'tis here again, boys.

Prig. Rest ye merry; My first trick has paid me.

All B. I, take it, take it, And take some drink too.

Prig. Not a drop now I thank you; Away, we are discover'd else. [Exit.

Enter Gerrard like a blind Aqua vitae man, and a Boy, singing the Song.

Bring out your Cony-skins, fair maids to me, And hold 'em fair that I may see; Grey, black, and blue: for your smaller skins, I'll give ye looking-glasses, pins: And for your whole Coney, here's ready, ready Money. Come Gentle Jone, do thou begin With thy black, black, black Coney-skin. And Mary then, and Jane will follow, With their silver hair'd skins, and their yellow. The white Cony-skin, I will not lay by, For though it be faint, 'tis fair to the eye; The grey, it is warm, but yet for my Money, Give me the bonny, bonny black Cony. Come away fair Maids, your skins will decay: Come, and take money, maids, put your ware away. Cony-skins, Cony-skins, have ye any Cony-skins, I have fine bracelets, and fine silver pins.

Ger. Buy any Brand Wine, buy any Brand Wine?

Boy. Have ye any Cony-skins?

2 [B.] My fine Canary-bird, there's a Cake for thy Worship.

1 B. Come fill, fill, fill, fill suddenly: let's see Sir, What's this?

Ger. A penny, Sir.

1 B. Fill till't be six-pence, And there's my Pig.

Boy. This is a Counter, Sir.

1 B. A Counter! stay ye, what are these then? O execrable Jugler! O dama'd Jugler! Look in your hose, hoa, this comes of looking forward.

3 B. Devil a Dunkirk! what a Rogue's this Jugler! This hey pass, repass, h'as repast us sweetly.

2 B. Do ye call these tricks.

Enter Higgen.

Hig. Have ye any Ends of Gold, or Silver?

2 B. This Fellow comes to mock us; Gold or Silver? cry Copper.

1 B. Yes, my good Friend, We have e'n an end of all we have.

Hig. 'Tis well Sir, You have the less to care for: Gold and Silver. [Exit.

Enter Prigg.

Pr. Have ye any old Cloaks to sell, have ye any old Cloaks to sell? [Exit.

1 B. Cloaks! Look about ye Boys: mine's gone!

2 B. A ——— juggle 'em? ——— O they're Prestoes: mine's gone too!

3 B. Here's mine yet.

1 B. Come, come let's drink then more Brand Wine.

Boy. Here Sir.

1 B. If e'r I catch your Sow-gelder, by this hand I'll strip him: Were ever Fools so ferkt? We have two Cloaks yet; And all our Caps; the Devil take the Flincher.

All B. Yaw, yaw, yaw, yaw.

Enter Hemskirk.

Hem. Good do'n my honest Fellows, You are merry here I see.

3 B. 'Tis all we have left, Sir.

Hem. What hast thou? Aqua vitae?

Boy. Yes.

Hem. Fill out then; And give these honest Fellows round.

All B. We thank ye.

Hem. May I speak a word in private to ye?

All B. Yes Sir.

Hem. I have a business for you, honest Friends, If you dare lend your help, shall get you crowns.

Ger. Ha! Lead me a little nearer, Boy.

1 B. What is't Sir? If it be any thing to purchase money, Which is our want, [command] us.

Boors. All, all, all, Sir.

Hem. You know the young spruce Merchant in Bruges?

2 B. Who? Master Goswin?

Hem. That he owes me money, And here in town there is no stirring of him.

Ger. Say ye so?

Hem. This day, upon a sure appointment, He meets me a mile hence, by the Chase side, Under the row of Oaks; do you know it?

All B. Yes Sir.

Hem. Give 'em more drink: there if you dare but venture When I shall give the word to seize upon him Here's twenty pound.

3 B. Beware the Jugler.

Hem. If he resist, down with him, have no mercy.

1 B. I warrant you, we'll hamper him.

Hem. To discharge you, I have a Warrant here about me.

3 B. Here's our Warrant, This carries fire i'th' Tail.

Hem. Away with me then, The time draws on, I must remove so insolent a Suitor, And if he be so rich, make him pay ransome Ere he see Bruges Towers again. Thus wise men Repair the hurts they take by a disgrace, And piece the Lions skin with the Foxes case.

Ger. I am glad I have heard this sport yet.

Hem. There's for thy drink, come pay the house within Boys, And lose no time.

Ger. Away with all our haste too. [Exeunt.