THE RUMSELLER'S SOLILOQUY

I had rum, and gin, and brandy All made of whiskey, too, And all arranged so handy To tempt their thirsty view. Oh! no they need not talk it, Those were happy times. With hand in drunkard's pocket Hauling out the dimes. Was I starving others? Then so let it be; Those children and the mothers Did not belong to me. While lying in the gutter, A mother's loving son, Conscience began to mutter At the deed I'd done. Then came this consolation Just in the nick of time; The law of state and nation Had legalized the crime. For I had got my license, Had paid my license fee; So the squeemish nonsense Had no effect on me. The brewers of the nation To the constitution go, To save their occupation From the prohibition blow, Wonder if the constitution Would reinstate me here; Defend me from invasion While selling rum and beer. For temperance is booming, My license now is dead, And poverty is coming, My children cry for bread. Gambling I've been trying But could not stand the test; With all my cheat and lying I came out second best. I wish I'd stuck to labor, Earned my bread by honest toil, Like my hale and happy neighbor Who ploughs and tills the soil. My flesh is made of lager, My muscles weak and lax; I cannot turn the auger, Swing the hammer or the ax. My children's cries so wounding, My heart with anguish torn; My troubles so confounding, I wish I'd not been born. The thread of life I'd sever And lay myself to rest; But thoughts of the forever Send trouble to my breast. Should I meet with retribution Beyond the bounds of time, Neither law nor constitution Would legalize the crime.